I have a colleague in work that is jealous of me. He watches and copies everything I do. If I sign up for or do a course he says "I think I should do that course too"!
Should I be flattered or tell him to go and get an imagination of his own?
2006-12-31 05:45:04 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Feel sorry for him, He must have pretty low self-esteem if he has to copy from anyone.
Try and ignore it and dont tell him what you are going to do!
It can be flattering but I also know how frustrating it is too!
You could try talking to him too. Ask him why he feels he has to do everything you do and then tell him that you don't like it and say why.
Good luck I'm sure if you try it can be resolved!
2006-12-31 07:52:59 · answer #1 · answered by willowGSD 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's annoying but it IS a form of flattery. As the other people on here have said, he probably feels a bit low in confidence himself but really looks up to you as a role model, so does what you do because he thinks that what you do is great. So, why don't you act like one? i.e. Firstly, make a little joke out of the fact that he copies you (but without taking the mickey). e.g. wow, I can't believe how alike we are! People are saying that we could be twins! Isn't that weird (or somthing like that)? if he doesn't get the hint, tell him how good he is at doing certain things, such as DIY and ask for his advice on it (without sucking up to him). If he says he wants to do a course that you doing, tell him how great he would be doing one on something he's really good at (you could even lead him to believe that you're doing it and then don't sign up for it and tell him that he's better than you at it if he asks why you've dropped out). If he copies what you wear, tell him about a fab personal shopper/shop you know for clothes that really suit him etc. In other words, you're encouraging him to find his own identity without being too nasty about it.
If none of this works, only then have a quiet word with him and tell him how you feel. i.e. I've noticed that you're doing such and such and to be honest I find it a bit uncomfortable. Why are you doing it?
Finally, if none of this works and you have a sympathetic boss/experienced colleague, why don't you ask him/her for advice about it?
Hope this helps!
2006-12-31 07:15:50 · answer #2 · answered by ice.mario 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
is there someone at work you trust that you can speak about this. maybe your manager. get their point of view and this is a good way of finding out if anyone else has notice his behaviour. another colleague could talk to him about his behaviour. but this is only as a last resort.
maybe he has feelings for you.
2006-12-31 06:05:46 · answer #3 · answered by b1uecee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can try talking to him and see if that solves things. If not, play small but annoying tricks on him...such as if he is overly neat, mess up his desk, etc. Or come to work dressed up as a woman and tell him he must come up with a better fashion than you if he wants to keep up. (I guess you are both men)
2006-12-31 05:55:57 · answer #4 · answered by Greanwitch 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That kind of person is lack of self esteem and happiness inside himself. He really doesn't know how to compete in a healthy way.
2006-12-31 05:51:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just feel sorry for him, he's obviously got low self esteem. Try to not tell him about everything you do.
2006-12-31 05:56:20 · answer #6 · answered by glgl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
be flattered, someone wanting to be like you, emulating what you do is the highest form of flattery
2006-12-31 05:51:07 · answer #7 · answered by rocky 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just get on with your life, he's not doing you any harm the way you tell it.
2006-12-31 05:50:51 · answer #8 · answered by funnelweb 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why not ask him why he is doing it,you may get a surprize.
2006-12-31 06:33:36 · answer #9 · answered by hamish f 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋