My wife and I both want to experiment outside marriage.We are very sure that it will not affect our marriage.Is it safe to be swapping partners?We want to do it with strangers....how can we do it?
2006-12-31 05:22:45 · 29 answers · asked by deoragrov 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My wife and i recently started this stuff , we were very sure it wouldn't affect our marriage too. But it most definitely has, i have been miserable ever since we started. She couldn't limit it to strangers, she started calling up old friends and she couldn't leave the strangers strange. ( i had 54 long distance phone calls to the stranger on my bill last month while i was working) my advice is even though you can trust her now i can't trust mine now , Don't do it. I have been working for months to get out of the mess I'm in. You really don't want to do this if your marriage is good. Find something else to spice things up. This is the downside that people in the life don't tell you about, it's as addictive as any drug and once you start you can't stop.
2006-12-31 05:34:23 · answer #1 · answered by Eddie N 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Look on line in your area for "Swingers" clubs. they are not hard to find. This is a big step and not for everyone. Make sure your wife and you talk about what is exceptable to do and what is not especially if this is your first time.
Most couples set "rules" for this type of activity, for examples they never allow swinging alone it must always be with the spouse present. Some couples even do "mild swing" where they have another couple present but only the foreplay and Petting is done with the other couple, for the actual sex they return to their spouse.
Please look into this carefully, it may sound exciting but it is not for everybody. If your marriage is not 100% it can break it.
If you are the type of couple that can do this and it not affect your marriage then go for it. It can put the zest back in and actually bring you closer to your spouse.
Its all what you make of it.
Safest thing to do if Join a swingers club. Most of them screen members and have monthly meetings that you can attend and meet people who are interested in the same thing, and the members have been pre-screened I would NOT recomment just picking up a stranger( you never know what you will get or what will happen)
Never invite somone you met back to your home. Your home is your "safe" place and that is just for you and your spouse to enjoy each other.
Be safe, Be carefull and only do what will enhance your relationship with your spouse.
2006-12-31 05:43:46 · answer #2 · answered by just_trump_my_ace 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wife swapping is an old term and a mysoginist one at that...most swingers and polyamorists are more "feminist" in nature...
this is very popular as monogamy is a farce...
there are many clubs to go to and groups on line - just do a quick google...you can be safe as long as you use protection and meet in places where others are around - which is why the club scene is good...
enjoy!
2006-12-31 05:28:26 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unless you know someone very very very well, there is always the chance you are taking unnecessary risks. So, is it safe? Not if you consider there are always risks... and especially if it is strangers. Search the internet for swingers clubs- I would think they would at least of some control over the "safety" of their members and your best chance would be there. Make sure you talk about everything that could happen and how both of you would react before you do it and be sure you are ready both physically and emotionally.
2006-12-31 05:30:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to watch some reports on swinging before you leap in. How old is your wife?
The report I saw most swingers clubs the people are in their 70's. Any time they get a young woman even 50. All those old men line up for her. And you will have some 70 year old raisin to swing with. And your wife will feel like a tramp.
Do your homework before you leap.
2006-12-31 05:28:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Most "swapping" agreements result in divorce.
Never ever swap or allow another couple or man in your bed.
The only thing that is relatively safe is a 3some..
Hubby, Wife and a woman the wife, and wife only, invites to share
the bed..
2006-12-31 05:26:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Well... what I've learned is that every marriage/relationship is different. To me this wouldn't be normal b/c my husband & I aren't into that sort of thing but if you're wife is willing & the other couple is also then... whatever... that's your guys' marriage.
2016-05-22 23:53:36 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I could not imagine someone else being with my wife, but on the other hand if it was something she felt strong about I would rather know about it than have it go on behind my back...GOOD LUCK
2006-12-31 06:15:52 · answer #8 · answered by hmwh_mwc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Swingers......this is what the new generation calls playing around only with this your spouse plays around also.....
Not about to condem one for his/her personal relationship like that but I think marriage is a committment to each other...If you feel you need to experiment then something is missing
2006-12-31 05:27:37 · answer #9 · answered by Gypsygrl 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
adultfriendfinder
Be aware that she may find a guy or gal she wants to be with more than you and she may want a divorce. Because you were a consenting partner you will not be able to divorce her for adultery
2006-12-31 06:03:53 · answer #10 · answered by fortyninertu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋