What should I do with my life?!?!?

Question

I am 28 and feel like there is so much passion and exhilaration inside of me, yet I am still Ms. Average. I have so much education and have worked so hard to become the person I think I'd like to be, but I still have no idea what I want out of life. So many people I speak to say the same thing - they know that they want a better life but cannot specifically pinpoint exaclty what to do to get out of the self-dug hole. I have read so many books on self-improvement, done courses, been to university - have re-trained in at least 10 different careers, yet still feel lost. Does everyone else feel the same - like there is something special inside of you, but after a while, you start to feel as though maybe life is just a treadmill and only a few 'lucky' people get to have amazing fulfilling lives? What is the point to life? How do you become a self-made successful person? It seems that arrogant, selfish people seem to get a lot further than kind and loving people. Why is this so? Thanks! x x

Answer 1

You stop thinking about it, and start doing it.

Answer 2

Hmm... a few points to note on this one I suppose- it's okay to be average. Not everyone can be a celebrity, and it's probably better to be yourself for your own sake.

What is the 'self-dug hole' you speak about? You doing nothing? If you just move a step then you are on your way out...

You have retrained in ten different careers? How long have you followed each career path? A month? Three months? If you reject each path before you have had chance to really understand it, then there's no wonder you feel you are having little progress.

I think all these guys saying 'just do it' have it quite right. Set out in the direction that feels best, and stick at it... even if it's the wrong direction, you need to start travelling to realise that, and going down the wrong path will help you to realise what the right one is.

Don't panic, strive for happiness, and you will find it. A steady career where you work hard and come home tired is not to be looked down on... that's what I hope for myself, something where I can use my skills.

Arrogant people may get further in a short time, but there is a badness inside them that twists them out of shape... if you are satisfied with your own conscience, that's enough, it's worth more than money.

Answer 3

A lot depends on what your definition of "succesful" is. Do you have to have a lot of money and flashy stuff or do you just need to be an important part of life to those you care about the most? If it's the former, you should probably do a little research into the different career fields you are qualified for, find the one with the greatest possibility for advancement and pay increase, and then begin persuing it. If you just want to be happy then you have nowhere to look but inside yourself. Think about the times you smiled the most, laughed the most, and enjoyed life the most. Then try to create your life around those things. Perhaps it's by being with the right person and you need to organize your life around that search. Or perhaps it's when you were in school, and then maybe you want to teach? I guess overall, to give life meaning and to feel succesful you have to find what makes you smile and do that as many times a day as possible.

Answer 4

Stephanie, think about something that you would like to try doing, and then do it. Work at it for some time and see if you are happy with it. Lives are not started with being amazing and fulfilling, one works up to that in time. One becomes a successful person by living life with small successes one at a time. And "self made", you will find usually have someone giving them the opportunity or helping them become so. Does success include marriage or family in your future? May the New Year bring you health,meaning and prosperity

Answer 5

think about what drives you, honestly. Hobbies, teaching, learning?


I the same age and I know what I wanted to do cause I always wanted to motivate people in terms of direction(in a nice way!)

You need to become assertive when necessary also. Be kind, polite and courteous and all the rest. If you want something badly enough, you'll find the ways which don't work but the more of those you find, the more likely you are at succeeding.

Its ok we were all put here for a reson life goes on so find a way to go on with it and be happy while you are doing just that!!

Answer 6

Okay - first thing to do is to have a more optimistic outlook on life. You, at 28, are at the very beginning, while I at 65 am near the end. Optimism and being interested in life now and what the future may hold for you, is the main stimulus which will see you along what may seem an uncertain road ahead.

Game plan. Start by putting down on paper all of your skills, not what you know, but what you are able to do with your hands; painting, drawing, needlework, driving and that sort of thing. This list will do more to help you understand the sort of person you are, in terms of meeting what life brings, than anything else.

Unfortunately, brain-power has very little to do with success. In fact, some of the most successful people in human history were not always that 'bright'.

When it comes to success in life's 'battle', the most aggressive people, the doers, will often succeed where others will fail.

Let's think of it in simple English country lore. "In this world there are two kinds of folk, them as do and them as don't. Them as don't, never do."

You have to try and turn yourself into a doer. That is, a person who is willing to take risks, such as starting a business or going into partnership with another person and starting a business. Risk takers often come out on top. No one will hate you if you fail but they will if you do not try and try again. People like those who keep on trying. Sooner or later such a person gets on top of what it is they are trying to achieve and becomes one of life's winners.

When we are at school for the first time, we quickly learn that it's all about being competative. We must compete with others to do better to try to be top of the class, not only in our studies but also at sports.

Never give up. Keep going. Follow your dreams.

Answer 7

think about what drives you, honestly. Hobbies, teaching, learning?


I the same age and I know what I wanted to do cause I always wanted to motivate people in terms of direction(in a nice way!)

You need to become assertive when necessary also. Be kind, polite and courteous and all the rest. If you want something badly enough, you'll find the ways which don't work but the more of those you find, the more likely you are at succeeding.

Plus, 28s that age where you know you're changing a hell of a lot mentally and you just start growing..........I'm still in it!!!

happy new year

Answer 8

Sounds like you're already living an interesting life... don't be so hard on yourself. We all feel the same at one point or another in life. The difference is the steps we take to make our lives more interesting. Sounds like you need to take time to enjoy the world. Travel. How about signing up to teach English in another country. You'll learn to appreciate what you already have and maybe learn about a culture diffferent than yours.
Then focus on the one career you enjoyed the most and be the best you can at it, give yourself a goal: the top.
Jumping around can make you confused.
Good luck and Happy New Year!

Answer 9

Firstly, stop reading self help books.

Clearly, if you have re-trained for ten different careers, then you have abilities. If you have been through university, then you have the academic wherewithal and the strength to carry yourself through.

You describe yourself as having passion and exhilaration inside of you ~ for what?

Often, it is not what you know that is important, it's what you don't know and the desire to fill that gap which leads you to where you might best flourish.

A treadmill is only a 'treadmill' if you perceive it that way.

A friend of mine continues to ask me 'if I am stuck in a rut,' or she tells me that I am. Well, if that's how she sees it, then that's what it is - for her - 'it's her perception,' but not the whole picture; it is not my perception of my life. And surely, it is my perception which is of the greater importance!

The point of Life is 'to Live it,' with your passion and exhilaration because, knowing so or not, these things in you will rub off onto others, and the effects will be felt.

'Amazing' (successful lives) is like the 'glamour' thing, it's the fantasy as perceived by the onlooker. What is the 'success' of anything is in the achievement of it, and I'm afraid that that is really like running a race, you only know you have won when you reach the end.

The successful businesswo/man is only as good as the last deal, only as good as s/he does not fail / fall down and screw up.

Like you, I get irritated that life seems to favour those with the guitar who make a lot of money and have their moments or idolatry without achieving any real or useful skills to society at large. But I'm not going to let myself dwell upon them or the Celebes whose (seemingly shallow) lives allow them to know the cost of whatever without knowing the values of anything (as money seemingly pours through their fingers).

Success is not 'money,' it is a sense of what / who you are, and awareness of your own integrity and that understanding of your connection to segments of society and the effects that you can have therein.

It’s those ‘connections’ with others that are so often so vital.


I hope some of this helps ~ and I’m sorry if none of it does.

[ I hope you can 'overlook' the stupid answers from the morons. They know not what they do. ]

I wish you the best for 2007.
Sash.

Answer 10

At 28 it is unsurprising that you do not know what to do, you may well still be tying to accomplish the stage of intimacy which will allow you to be unself centred enough to see the possibilities that exist if you focus on others not yourself (that's not meant to be patronising or insulting, just the case, i was definitely the same)

Look up the following, Eriksons stages of development and also post conventional morality. Have a bit of a think and decide where you are at, then focus outside and accept that success is self defined at the end of a lifetime (not the beginning where you are, you lucky girl)

Answer 11

Live it to the last minute!!!!!!!!!
Learn about your self, things you are good at and how to improve your self. Learn about different places you'll like to go to, plan for your future. But most of all be a positive thinker!!! It will take you far and you will be happier. Think big!!! But never hurt anyone on the way, help others succeed and you will find your way for success too. There is so much to do. Just star this year, God will be with you all the way, believe and trust!! Blessings dear avatar!