Last night I saw a "flaming" gay man in a homosexual relationship say to his ex girlfriend: "we would have been married and had ten babies by now if our parents didn't make such a big deal about us seeing each other".
Also, being married, having children, then going to a homosexual lifestyle is very common.
How do you explain the 'choice' and ability to stay in heterosexual relationships for decades then go exclusively to homosexual ones. Or for that matter, bisexuality.
How does that differ with other homosexuals who have never had sex with a woman or man ever?
Is Elton John, for example, less a homosexual, Freddie Mercury, (both married previously), or Anne Heiche?
How does genetics and environment more than anything play a role in behavior? Sexual or otherwise?
2006-12-31 03:29:03 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Sorry to burst your illusionary bubble but homosexuality IS a choice! That fallacy that it was not a choice was sold to the public starting back in the 80's by two leaders of the homosexual movement. One was a marketing graduate from Harvard and the other was a psychology graduate from Harvard. They put the two together to SELL homosexuality after the breakout of the AIDS virus and when people started to see the results of the homosexual lifestyle. It worked too. People bought it hook line and sinker.
2006-12-31 03:38:29 · answer #1 · answered by allen r 1 · 2⤊ 4⤋
Many gay people TRY HARD to fit the old school morals of our society. When they get married, and even have kids and straight sex, I feel that there are a few things at play:
1. they want to try to fit into people's expectations
2. they want a family life - family life is good!
3. thinking maybe if "I try hard enough I can can change my orientation "
But this usually won't work. (except for family life - people who love each other can make this work any way they want to)
Homosexuality is not a choice. Bisexuality is. The difference in my opinion is that if one really enjoys straight sex and relationships, they will always go back to that. I have seen it a zillion times. Contrasted with gays - who, having accepted there's no choice in the matter, stay in the gay relationship arena.
I don't think it's genetics that determines sexual preference. I am certain that environment does not foster gayness. Look at case studies of kids forced to live with, or in opposition to the way they are made. It does not work. You can't force sexual preference one way or the other. It is what it is.
Opinion: Elton John, Freddie Mercury, are/were gay men trying to change who they were, and finally gave in to their personal truth and stopped apologizing for it. Anne Heche - bisexual, and went back. A lot of us experiment. I have seen many women flip-flop sexual orientation over years and be in monogamous relationships of both kinds. I have seen this far less frequently with men.
It's cool to try to understand this dynamic, But, I think our society needs to stop judging what otherwise productive and good people do behind closed doors. Let people alone in the bedroom - it's just a part of who someone is - not their definition as a human being
2006-12-31 11:56:15 · answer #2 · answered by justbeingher 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a very complicated subject. For some people homosexuality is not a choice, it's in their biochemistry. For others it is a choice. As far as being bisexual, I am not certain, but I would say that it's the same as being homosexual. For some it may be in their chemical makeup, I mean, why can't there be a chemical cause for bisexuality just like for homosexuality, and again for others it's a choice. I am by far no expert on the subject but I have had friends who were both. One female friend switched back and forth, so she was bisexual. I had a male friend who stayed strictly with men and never varied. Both homosexuality and bisexuality are found not only in humans but in other species as well. All in all I would say that any combination whether it be homosexual, bisexual or heterosexual are all normal and a part of the many variations in nature.
2006-12-31 11:45:09 · answer #3 · answered by Firefighters Wife 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There's a lot of discussion not just outside, but inside the gay/lesbian/bi community about sexual identity...I agree with Kinsey's hypothesis that all humans can have a sexual identity that ranges from exclusively heterosexual to exclusively homosexual. So like most scales, the majority of human beings fall somewhere between the two ends of the spectrum. So that's why some people who are gay have never been interested in being with anyone of the opposite sex; and why some heterosexuals can't imagine being interested in someone of the same sex.
I think the reason so many people marry is because it's expected. Later, they figure out they are really gay or bisexual. Since being gay or bi is condemned by many people in our society, many people don't even consider it, even if that is how they really feel. Others get divorced, and some feel that they are willing to take the risk to find out who they really love and are attracted to. But the risks in our society are high-you can lose your job in most states for being gay, you can lose custody of your children, you will be rejected by many churches, and you face rejection by your family, friends and community. In most states, you still can't marry your partner and if you don't make a really good will, your partner does not have any rights to their home, their furnishings, savings, retirement, etc.
I married my best (male) friend after college, but had also been in love with my best (female) friend. After 5 years, I divorced my husband, I dated women and was with my female partner for over 15 years..for the last two years I've been dating men and now my male partner is living with me. I won't marry him, unless my gay/lesbian/bi friends can marry their partners, too. My state has been trying to pass laws that only heterosexuals can marry, so don't think I'll be getting married in my lifetime.
2006-12-31 11:54:11 · answer #4 · answered by edith clarke 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
People are born Gay. They choose to be bisexual. To be bisexual is to be confused. If you speak, heart to heart, with a bisexual person, you will find that they are really gay or straight but, what they are truly seeking is the "nurturing" love from from the "bi" encounter and are confusing it with "sexual" love OR they are just behaving hedonisticly.
Beging married, having children and then going into a homosexual relationship? That's easy, they were living a lie. It was more acceptable to live the "normal" lifestyle and then they realized they needed to live an authentic life.
2006-12-31 11:58:56 · answer #5 · answered by Fortuna 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Like baby ducks imprint on the first thing moving as a mother. Ever seen baby ducks trailing around behind a bewildered cat? It happens.
It is thought that humans imprint on behavior.
Girls imprint on something strong and assertive for a mate (a father image)
Boys imprint on something soft and nurturing for a mate (a father image)
If a young boy sees his father as soft and nurturing then he might be gay.
If a young girl sees her mother as strong and assertive then she might be gay.
So for some reason each of identical twins might get different impressions.
During a certain time of the month women report a different image of attractiveness.
What is attractive can change with mood or suggestion.
Girls with lack of discipline and direction from their Father may want to be "tamed".
Abandoned children may seek a wife/mother or a husband/father.
Sex is a symbol of bonding & intimacy for those hungry to control a mate
Sex is a biochemical psychedelic drug making symbols and images seem real.
For me sex gives me a feeling that, "I have arrived!"
2006-12-31 11:39:52 · answer #6 · answered by Russell W 3 · 0⤊ 4⤋
silence speaks loudly
2006-12-31 11:35:47 · answer #7 · answered by HEY boo boo 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋