Recently for Christmas I gave him expensive clothes, but he gave me absolutely nothing.
2006-12-31 02:43:51 · 26 answers · asked by Leslie S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My husband is often not the greatest gift giver, he says it impossible to buy for the woman that can already buy whateve she want for herself. I have found direct confrontation works best and maybe your overlooking something he did that he thought was fabulous. My husband got my car detailed, hmmm not exactly true romance is it. But I know he loves me.
2006-12-31 02:47:55 · answer #1 · answered by 35 and loving it! 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hello,
Yes, your husband loves you!! Please don't think that because he didn't purchase you gifts, material things for Christmas that his love isn't there. Take some time to look at the situation and the reason for Christmas. It's surely not about purchasing expensive gifts to tell someone or show them you love them. Though the thought is nice and sometimes grand, but again that's not what love, Christmas is about.
If your unsure that he doesn't love you or wondering why he didn't purchase you any gifts be it expensive or not then I suggest that you talk to him about this. Here's an idea for you both for next year... Instead of purchasing each other gifts or you purchasing him a gift. Pick a child that you know or even don't know to buy him/her a gift. You want to talk about feeling the love, spirit of Christmas..it's just a feeling you want be able to describe to anyone. This way you'll both know not to go out and purchase gifts for each other and it want be expected.
Trust me your husband loves you so don't even begin to work yourself up about this nor carry it into the new year ok...
You two should do something special tonight and ring in the new year in each others arms...besides how do you know that tonight he want hand you something when the clock strikes midnight? hummmm you never know....
Take care of yourself!!!
Happy New Year 2007!!!
cheers to you & your husband!!
2006-12-31 02:57:38 · answer #2 · answered by ssgtmommy01 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a risky assumption with many men that thoughtfulness is an indication of love. Persons with guilty consciences often lavish gifts upon the betrayed party.
Especially questionable are those periods for obligatory gifting or carding. I personally dislike cards, stopped sending them long ago, and pitch them when they arrive, and the first to go are those with extended messages about the kid's first year at Harvard Med School and hubby's recent promotion in the firm with the advance in income. Sh*t! I feel like writing to tell them all that I'm blind and my damn dog died.
My wife (whom I love with all my heart) and I took council several years ago and fell upon the novel idea of just saying, "Merry Christmas, honey, I love you still and always shall," in lieu of gifts we neither need nor want.
She just came in and read this over my shoulder. She went to a closet and retrieved an unopen box that, as it developed, contained a gift intended for a Christman sometime in the period of the Early Republic, but had been forgotten. A couple of nice shirts that I had no need for then and none now. We laughed . . . together.
There are so many other manifestations of love that gifting pales to insignificance. I'm betting he loves you in the normal way and according the phase your marrage has reached and passed through.
I have fallen upon one conclusion in my life, honey, that I think may be a sort of wise insight. It is this: when you see that tottering old couple come into Bob Evans' on a Sunday morning, still holding hands, dancing the dance of life together through the long haul to very end, don't conclude that you are witnessing two loving, understanding and patient humans who have committed their lives to making one another happy. The odds are that you are looking at just one such person, and the lucky dumbell who was fortunate enough have married her. Your husband may very well be just a lucky dumbell, but you must never let on.
Bless you, my dear, bless you.
2006-12-31 03:27:05 · answer #3 · answered by john s 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is he seeing someone else? Has he always had this behavior? Did he have money to purchase you a gift? Some guys don't like buying gifts, or forget about it. Well, if your husband doesn't love you, how do you know? Maybe you need to evaluate your life. Why are you with someone that doesn't love you? I think you need to do some soul searching. What attracted you to this man in the first place? I would have to know more in order to answer this for you.
2006-12-31 02:52:03 · answer #4 · answered by supersweetfungal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ouch!! Perhaps you're trying too hard. May I suggest backing off a bit and acting very confident and independent around him? He may feel you pull away and pursue again. A great book on the subject is "Love must be Tough" by Dr. Dobson
2006-12-31 02:46:44 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Come on do you really think that by only giving presents we express love to each other. Don't come to conclusions in such a short notice. There are people who express love internally and do not express with material things and that is Platonic love. he is probably expressing that. Find out.
2006-12-31 03:02:08 · answer #6 · answered by Tony 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, I undstand that feeling. Recently, I was with a man and I spent more money on him then he ever spent on me. I didn't mind at first because I'm not a materialist ... BUT, he made a statement that really hurt my feelings. He stated that he wanted a women who would take care of him.
That statement above sent chills up my spine .... LOL!!!! And thats one of the reasons we are NOT together anymore.
He was such a loser ..........
2006-12-31 03:01:55 · answer #7 · answered by rosie768 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gosh, i dont know what to say...
Pray a lot that he change for the better and that he realize how you love him dearly. And hope that he might change.
If he doesnt, then move on, get a divorce, find a new husband that will love you back.
Everybody deserve to be loved and be happy. That includes you...
Good Luck...
2006-12-31 02:48:31 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love the way You Changed Your avatar after the questions. Good luck with your hubby , everyone has problems in a marriage but they will work out if you Communicate....
2006-12-31 03:17:06 · answer #9 · answered by ~just_jd~ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is it really that important for you,expensive materials?!!!thats funny.come on its no big deal.you should not even think about it.did you buy those things for him because in return you expected some expensive materials?!!!he is your HUSBAND, the dearest person in your life!!!maybe he is in trouble financially or morally,maybe he needs your help.for gods sake don't judge that way.talk to him,show your love to him.men are nothing without women's support.materials worth nothing comparing to LIFE&LOVE
2006-12-31 03:09:08 · answer #10 · answered by kiki 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋