Should I still be making love with my x-husband when I no that it will be just that.?

Question

We get along better now then before was togeter for 8 years

Answer 1

There is nothing wrong with x-sex. As long as there is a clear definition of what the encounters are. If it is JUST sex then have at it. It saves the one night stands, and there is an amazing comfort zone where you could both be fulfilled sexually because you know what each other wants/needs in the bedroom.

If you are hoping for a reconcilliation--then there should be clear and concise communication on that part of the encounter. If one of you is looking to reconcile, and not the other--then sex is definetly a bad idea!!! Because someone could end up hurt--AGAIN!!! Be cautious and COMMUNICATE--after eight years of "knowing" each other--that should be the easiest thing to do! Expecially since you are already divorced--if you communicate--no harm, no foul!!!

Answer 2

It sounds kind of bad because somewhere along the line someones emotions can get hurt and it could only cause more confusion and pain. Any therapist will tell you that he's your ex and should remain your ex unless you are going to reconcile. Please try to find someone else to have sex with that you don't have such a past with and be able to move on for yourself.

Answer 3

i am still doing the same thing with my ex wife and although the sex is out of this world, because there have been others, feelings will never be the same and the memories of when it was good torment me again because it will never be like the first time we met. Too much bagage and like they say if you couldnt resolve your differences then what makes you think you can do it now.
if indeed you think nothing will come of it then why are you waisting time as i am as well.

Answer 4

I would say it depends on how you feel afterwards. If, hours later, you feel good and pleased, then why not? If you feel distraught, used, frustrated or left wanting something more, then I would say you're hurting yourself with 'short-term gain and long-term pain' behavior.

It's harder to let go of our fantasies of a relationship with someone than the actual relationship. The "woulda's / coulda's, if only..." are hard to let go of. Just make sure you're staying in the present and not wanting to make your relationship something it's not. If you don't kid yourself, you'll move on if or when you're ready.

Answer 5

And you like being a door matt why?
And you haven't moved on why?
Do you enjoy being used?
Are you content to remain in this rut and continue your life without a nice guy in it?
Is this all you think you are good for?

Make a new year's resolution to find and be with a guy who deserves you, hon.

Answer 6

It's up to you to decide what you can and can't handle. If you are both single and know it's just sex, AND you are being responsible for yourself, meaning using protection to avoid disease and pregnancy, then why not? It's not uncommon. With many people it's just part of the "letting go" process.

Answer 7

No,because it will lead to problem down the road.Sex has some form of emotional ties to it and if you guys are over it better to cut and run and same the friendship.

Answer 8

I have it on good authority that sex is better after the divorce. There are fewer ties and you are there for a variety of reasons: you are human & have needs, it is convenient & familiar, if you decide you don't want to anymore you don't have to, etc. Enjoy it and don't feel guilty about it!

Answer 9

depends what u hope to gain from it, if it's just about lust and u want more than that, than it is just going to hurt u and make u feel used. as we have to let go completely of the past before we can move on.

Answer 10

I think one should not hurry in such matters. Because you were together for long and then fell apart. Go slow and initially just be nice to each other. later you may tink.