but should I dump him already? I live on my own and don't feel the need to support another "child"....personal experiences preferred....
2006-12-29 19:47:20 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
Mama, put babygirl to sleep and pick out what curb you are going to kick your babys dad to. If he hasn't found a job during the past 5 months and probably not when you were pregnant (I'm taking a wild guess there) don't think he's going to do it anytime soon.
When I was with my babys biological father, it wasn't about finances and responsibility. I was told I had fertility issues and wasn't worried about protection and lo and behold, I got pregnant. The whole time we were going out, I was the one with a job while he would talk about how he wanted a job to support us. Talk don't buy diapers. I was pregnant walking a mile a day (bus changed routes near where I worked) in the winter while he did not work. It's about responsibility and frankly, if you are even thinking about dumping him and not supporting him, that's the first step in the process.
It's just me and my boy and we're doing fine. You will find how much extra cash you have when he's not around. It's the little things that add up and that's just cash in the bank for your little girl. My babys father smoked a pack a day (never near him, always washed up after every cig, sorta funny story there but I digress...). A pack a day, thats an extra 5 bucks in my pocket. So say that I contributed to 4 packs a week. thats 208 packs a year. Which is an extra thousand bucks (and change) I have for me and my son.
Do the math. It really helps when you can see on paper how much support he's getting off of you.
2006-12-29 21:30:23 · answer #1 · answered by Mindiwe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he hasn't gotten a job by now he won't. He knew for 9 months that you were going to be having a baby plus 5 more months so you have to think about it like this: If he isn't willing to support his own kid and you then what good is he?
I would put in a claim for child support through the courts or the welfare office.
Sign up on welfare then they will go after him and if he dosen't pay then oh well they will take him to jail.
It is time for him to grow up. Put him out if he can't do no better.
2006-12-29 19:51:43 · answer #2 · answered by ஐ♥Julian'sMommy♥ஐ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would dump the guy...I didnt have a child with this guy I was dating but her is the situation...
I was 16 when I met chase and he worked at our local walmart well when he turned 18 our neighbor offered him a job so he took it he had to work at this job 30 days before he would be full time well he got fired before his 30 days.. he had a truck payment and a cellphone bill and etc.. and only being 16 I had to pay ALL the bills.. then he started drawing unemployment and then when it ran out he got a job at donnelleys.. and got fired from there and then once again he sat off work forever until I bitched enough and I got him a job with me and he got fired from there... once they dont want to work and wont look for a job they never will work as long as you will support them.. My dad is the same way he doesnt ever have a job and 25,000 dollars behind in child support.. If I was you I would be running for the hills!!
2006-12-29 20:14:57 · answer #3 · answered by kamdens mommy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
These people telling you to run are wrong. Your child still needs a dad. Make him do the babysitting while you are at work and don't give him any money. You don't need to support him but you can still have him help out until he grows up enough to realize he has another person to help support. DON'T get sucked into the "child support" system. That just supports crooked judges and lawyers.
2006-12-29 20:49:58 · answer #4 · answered by J D 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
RUN fast AWAY from this guy -- if he has taken advantage of you alreayd this long (for you to get pregnant, deliver the child, and now the child is 6 months old ...) ...
Well, the tiger won't change his stripes at this time (Meaning ... he will NOT Get a JOB because he is and will be continuing to sponge off of you as long as you LET HIM DO IT!)
GO FAR AWAY -- and DO file with your state's office for Child Support Enforcement -- Identify him as the Prospective Father, and let them go after him!
2006-12-29 19:59:01 · answer #5 · answered by sglmom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, dump him and move on. Go to court and get a court order for child support and custody and visitation issues. Don't cut him out of the childs life, since he is the biological father, but don't let him off the hook either. Being cut off from dad isn't good for the child, nor is it good for her to hear you fight with him or denigrate him. Be graceful and classy and rise above any cattiness he might dispense.
2006-12-29 20:46:30 · answer #6 · answered by LindaLou 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No girl. not unless hes done something seriously wrong. I was married to one of those and while I was at work he actually did the laundry housework? He was Italian and had that temper thing but everything was cool until another lady scared our girls while we had ran out to the store because she was carrying his child. Opps! The girls did not open the door. thank god! and I actually made her show me an ultrasound to prove it. MK and could not resist breaking into her house and taking everything that belonged to him out, before I left. What can I say? If hes a good man dont worry.
2006-12-29 20:02:22 · answer #7 · answered by JAMI E 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YES run girl RUUUUUN! Let me tell you about Jason, I spent 6 years with this fool, for the first 3 years he did nothing, no work, no school nothing! Id come home from work and he'd leave newspapers with jobs circled around it, so I thought he just wasnt getting lucky - little did I know it was all a ploy after 6 years I finally gave up and left him. The man Im with now, though he isnt my sons "father" he has provided us with EVERYTHING weve ever needed.
2006-12-29 19:50:34 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
for sure, all of us would not do not ignore that. it would want to be instantly ahead experience to maximum folk yet those who've in no way been round toddlers does not understand it. Adults many times get sunburns themselves and they are able to experience the nice and cozy temperature and burn. a toddler can not tell the ascertain that they are burning. it does not be confusing for a toddler to get a sunburn (even extreme) without the mothers and fathers being criminally negligent.
2016-12-01 08:06:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Baby Girl, Give the brother a chance! I know five months is a long time, but sometimes it takes a little longer for some of us to grow up than others. Now if this guy is into negative behavior, like drugs and alcohol. The "Heart to Heart" conversation needs to happen immediately. This is when u sit him down face to face, and explain that u need help raising your baby girl. Explain to him that you would like for it to be him that helps raise his daughter, and it takes money, time and responsibility to do this properly. When my son was born it took about a year for the light to come on.
2006-12-29 20:16:50 · answer #10 · answered by retarted_genius 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋