I'm 25, married with no children, my marriage starts when i felt lonely, depressed and devastated 3 years ago, i was trying to get out of the horrible situation but it didn't work out! my first days & months of living together are always a nightmere to me! however by the time passing, it comes down and happend to be stable! at times i felt i don't love him, i felt to be interested in other individuals, i felt depressed, angry and indifferent but i couldn't leave him! even at the time i felt that i've found my special one i couldn't resist his statement that he loves me!
now i need to make it clear for myself, i still hurt by the way he treated me in past, i still have my special one in my mind, but i can't stop thinking about my husband and i can't resist calling him and looking at his eyes!! do i love him? should i forgive him and start a fresh start? or should i resolve this with myself and go toward my own way?
2006-12-29 19:30:55 · 19 answers · asked by liliap60 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hi Lilia,
I am answering you from experience... another relationship.. another person added into things doesn't resolve anything. In fact it can make things harder for you. Having to end a relationship, he'll be hurting and so will you.
Do everything within your power to resolve your marital issues.
Have a sit down with your husband, tell him how you've been feeling. And since he loves you, would he be willing to work on a few things, together, with you. You said enough to make me feel sure that you do love your husband.
I wish you the best! :)
2006-12-29 19:47:33 · answer #1 · answered by Sandra Dee 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try marriage counciling first...help resolve things in the past and in the present! If it still seems like it does not work....than it is best to get a divorce! You can't stay in a relationship just to make the other person happy!!! Be honest with yourself and step up to the plate!!!
2006-12-30 03:36:10 · answer #2 · answered by September Sweetie 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know, only you can answer that question. If in your heart you feel that he is the man for you then you need to stop playing your games and stop seeing other people and actually work on your marriage. You came in to this marriage with a lot of backage and you need to own it. If you decided to stay in the marriage you need to stick by the marital rules which mean being faithful and love one another.
2006-12-30 03:39:31 · answer #3 · answered by Serinity4u2find 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like you already know the answer. If you question your love then you do not believe in it. You may be attached to him as an idea more than a person, and that may be your downfall in this case. I say "as an idea" because you probably want someone to be able to confide in and to love you but that doesn't mean you want him; he's just all you know right now. If you aren't sure he's the one you want, and three years have already passed, then I'd say you should move on.
2006-12-30 03:36:25 · answer #4 · answered by Gray 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are soo many ways to think about your situtation. You take pieces of what you know and analize it all to death. I know I been there, everybody has or will.
You must release the prisoner (You) and forgive and forget. Try that for 6 months, do your best if that does not work, move on.
Good Luck and Happy New Year!
2006-12-30 03:37:36 · answer #5 · answered by Tiger Crane Master 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you might love him BUT your not IN LOVE with him!! I would say get out now while you both have time to find your sole mate and there are no children to hurt. Latter in life you 2 may meet and be more settled in life and get back to gather on better terms. But for now leave and find your self. Please don't waite and have kids as they are the ones that get hurt the most. *
2006-12-30 03:55:55 · answer #6 · answered by Les Gramps 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW I know how you feel, Im in a similar predictament. But think to youself does it hurt more to be with or without this man. I feel like you do need a fresh start because if u dont wakeup everyday knowing ur hubby is the man you want to be with then maybe you dont belong together, but thats just how I feel - Yet I havent got the balls to do it myself so good luck
2006-12-30 03:32:57 · answer #7 · answered by cvegas229 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You still have that liking for him. It will be difficult for you to develop liking for two people at the same time and justify yourself. I think you need to have a self introspection and consider the pros and cons on leaving your husband. Give one more chance to your husband. If it fails again go your own way.
2006-12-30 03:40:36 · answer #8 · answered by Tony 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You married your husband while trying to get over another man?? BAD--no wonder--you were just trying to fill a void and unfortunately you involved someone else That is if I read this question correctly--I think thou you are doing him wrong by not being honest with him --
2006-12-30 03:41:29 · answer #9 · answered by skizzle-d-wizzle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you do things for him that you do not normally do for people, even your friends, you still love him. You may be disinterested now but you need to ask yourself: do you like being with him and being his partner? I suggest you also seek out a marriage consular.
2006-12-30 03:37:10 · answer #10 · answered by THe VaN 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋