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I have an adopted daughter but not one of my own.

2006-12-29 13:51:36 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting Trying to Conceive

28 answers

Here's the thing; you have to do what is right for you. There are a lot of women having children in their late 30's and early 40's. It is not like when we were kids and most of the parents were younger. Truth is we live longer now and are healthier than our parents. It is true that there is a greater risk for health problems during pregnancy and an increased risk of birth defects due to age. It would be more difficult to conceive and may require fertility treatments which are very expensive. I had my son at 38. I had 4 other children in my 20's. My son has been a wonderful addition to the family and I have found that I have been able to enjoy him more. I sometimes think of how old I will be when he is 20 ect. He keeps me young. You are as young as you feel. I still get out and play ball with my older kids and go bike riding, rollerskating, ice skating ect. I do not see this changing soon so I feel that my son will have a fun mom even though she is older. Good luck to you what ever you decide!

2006-12-29 15:37:26 · answer #1 · answered by wesleyann 3 · 0 0

I think you should be happy with your adopted daughter.
43 is way to old to have a baby. Have you thought about how old you would be when he/she graduates high school.
My mother had me when she was 37 and I always had a hard time in school. My mom was always so much older than the other mothers.
Mother's that are older don't tend to do things that younger parents would.
You would be 53 when your child is 10 years old.
you would be 63 when your child is 18.
You would be 73 when your child is 28.
You wouldn't even be around to see your grand kids grow up.
That is pretty sad.
I really advise not to have a baby at such a late age. Just enjoy your life and do things with your adopted daughter.

2006-12-29 22:08:59 · answer #2 · answered by Tired-Mom 5 · 2 1

Having a baby at 43 is never easy. I guess you know all the risks to the child even if you are in good physical condition. I got pregnant for the first time when I was 39. I was worried about the baby all through my pregnancy, but my baby was a healthy 9lb5oz boy. Today he's an intelligent, happy, well-adjusted 12 year old. Personally, I don't think 43 is too late.

2006-12-29 22:03:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0 2

You are a lot more tired as an older mom. It is still the most fulfilling and challenging thing you can do. You do have to be realistic about your age as the child's age progresses like the other answerer outlined. It is stressful to go through a high risk pregnancy anytime and an over 35 pregnancy is always considered high risk no matter what shape you're in.

2006-12-30 02:37:47 · answer #4 · answered by ? 6 · 1 0

I think it's a little too late to have a baby at age 43.
I think your body can handle it a little.

2006-12-29 21:54:11 · answer #5 · answered by Kristina P 2 · 3 1

Can you handle the sleepless nights and loss of freedom? Also, genetic disorders such as Downs syndrome greatly increase after age 35. Would you be willing and able to raise a special child, or abort if you were not willing to carry the fetus to term? Do you think you could handle a teenager when you're in your sixties?

Think too, that this child could possibly lose you at a relatively early age. Losing my mom was hard as a mature adult; it would be even harder for someone in their late teens/early twenties.

2006-12-29 21:59:29 · answer #6 · answered by Gillian 3 · 3 2

They will probably consider it a high risk pregnancy, but it's more and more common. Look at Madonna. Try to get as healthy as you can before you conceive and take really good care of yourself.

You do have a daughter of your own. You adopted her. That means she is yours.

2006-12-29 21:59:42 · answer #7 · answered by Paula from Maple Street 4 · 3 0

Socially: NO- You're too damn old- accept that fact that you're pre-menopausal and MOVE ON.

Physically: NOT without intervention. Your child years were from 18-35, anything thereafter greatly increases risks to infant and mother.

Hollywood may claim it's okay- but the silent majority still have old-fashioned views such as STANDARDS and DECORUM.
If you're that keen- why not adopt (from you native country) or sponsor some poor kid?

2006-12-30 02:42:53 · answer #8 · answered by Ministry of Camp Revivalism 4 · 1 1

No it's not too late. But the older you get after 40 your chances of complications such as miscarriages and birth defects do increase. There are plenty of women who have had children when they were older than 43 though that were healthy. Good Luck!

2006-12-29 21:53:57 · answer #9 · answered by Mrs_M 4 · 1 2

I don't think age in itself is a defining factor. Your physical health is. Having answered that however, you have to consider the effects of your biological clock.

The best way to verify that is by going to a specialist who could test you and verify your possibilities.

There is a possibility that your time to produce eggs is gone, however, even then there are possibilities. My wife received donated eggs from her younger sister, which were fertilized with my sperm. We had to go through a very aggressive process of medications (progesterone - three times daily, injection, pills and cream), plus all the other recommended vitamins and supplements and a very careful medical follow up program. Our doctors were all specialists on their fields and help us inmensely.

Today, we have three beautiful and healthy girls (triplets).

2006-12-29 22:07:13 · answer #10 · answered by Marko 2 · 0 1

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