I want to make it better......?

Question

I love my husband very much but his family are causing our 2 month marriage to go down the drain. They have mentally abused me pretty much since weve been together, but the last year has been hell, i am so low ive tried to commit suicide 3 times in about 6 weeks, i was nearly sectiones yesterday that i was so ill over his family. I am pregnant and the stress is doing me and the baby no good. I am seeing lots of different people to try and help me deal with things but its just not working. I want him to choose and although to you lot it might not seem acceptable, its the only thing that will hold our marriage together, cos i cant take it anymore.Even my GP says he needs to make a choice. I dont know what to do, talking ends up in an argument, everytime without fail, he just wont choose. If i leave i have nowhere to go and will end up on the streets. Im a confused mess, anyone got any advice

Answer 1

You can leave, go to your local social services or council department, they will help you with accomodation and benefits. Dont let this mans family do this to you, you and your baby deserve better than that, you're not being unfair asking your husband to make this decision. You need to think of yourself and your baby now. good luck

Answer 2

Ask your GP if there are any housing for homeless mothers in your area if you don't have a friend or relative's house to stay at. If your husband won't talk about this with you then it sounds to me like he's already chosen and it's not you. And think about how these people might treat your baby, why would you want your child to deal with them? Get out of the marriage and out of the situation. You need to stand up for yourself and especially for your baby. Be a woman, be a mom, and straighten up your spine. Don't let someone else run your life, run it yourself!

Answer 3

Just forget about the in laws. Have nothing to do with them. don't speak to them, about them or be in their company.

concentrate on your preganancy and the health of your baby. What does it matter what the family think about you? Don't continue to ask your husband to choose because it is likely that you would lose and to be honest, I think you are strong enough to put the family out of your mind. Where are your family and friends, rely on them for the support you need throughout your marriage and your pregnancy.

If you don't pull yourself together soon the social services will put your unborn baby on their 'at risk list' and when the baby is born they will be forever meddling in your life.... So , pull yourself together and get your priorities straight and get some help from your health visitor, tell her you are stressed.

Answer 4

Can you not allow him to see his family but have no contact with them yourself ??? If you feel you have to leave then go to your local council and expalin you cannot stay in the marital home because of emotional abuse - they will house you temporarily at first but then you could get a housing assc. place because you are pregnant. There is always a way out. Talk to citizens advice or Samaritans. Good luck love xxxx

Answer 5

Yes. Anything you feel that is worth having is worth fighting for. But I'm really not sure he or his family are worth fighting for. If you don't have the will to fight - then flee - you must have friends who can temporarily (at least) she;ter you - and give you (but more importantly HIM) more perspective.

Sounds to me as though if you take this drastic step it may knock some sense into him nd he'll realise what he's on the verge of losing.

Answer 6

If this man loves you and knows how u feel he should not want anything to do with his idiotic family u do not deserve that especially as u are carrying his child u should give him a choice and he should choose u if not get rid

Answer 7

tell your husband that his family is affecting your mental health and you all need a fresh start and to move further away from them - to help you recover, you can go to a refuge, homeless welfare speak to social services-get them on your side or go and get counselling together or alone. some parents just cant cut the apron strings, I know youre going through hell, ghood lcuk sugar

Answer 8

sorry but first off I have to say I have no respect for people who try to commit suicide. thats the cowards way out, especially if you are pregnant. life if tough hunny and if anyone told you otherwise then they lied. be strong for both you and your baby and leave him. if he really loves you then he'll be back. if not then you arent loosing anything anyway. if you arent willing to help yourself then nobody can help you. good luck and remember that your worth more then nothing so stop treating yourself like you dont matter.

Answer 9

Your inlaws are verbal abusers, i'll bet they have been abusing your husband for years, they start their abuse by chipping away at your self asteem..if you cant get your husband away from them then remove yourself..he wont choose because he has no self esteem left..they have convinced him that he is a looser and he cant live without them.. I feel sorry for you..you have to get away from this situation, please seriously find somewhere to go, get away ..

Answer 10

Get counseling. Please. If your hubby won't go, do it for yourself. He needs to stand up to you since he is your man and is to protect you from physical and emotional abuse. He needs a reality check. Take care of yourself and your baby.
You're in my prayers :)