highschool sweetheart and is sending her secret messages through her my space site? Thier breakup was caused by her mother, so there were unresolved issues between them. Also she is now married and living in another state, however my husband will be going to that area for a buisiness convention soon. Should I be worried, and confront him? We have been married 5 years and have two children, and I've never had reason not to trust him, however I'm uncomfortable with him contacting her.
2006-12-29 10:41:59 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am not married, I was asking this question for a friend so I will leave the voting up to you.
2007-01-01 12:09:14 · update #1
sounds bad, but the good part is that he has already slept with her before, so if he does it again, it is not really cheating.
2006-12-29 10:47:27 · answer #1 · answered by shane892000 2 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Marriage is all about trust. You are his love and life now. She is just something from the past. Have you seen anything that he has written her? I'm sure it is all innocent. If you are concerned about it, then you should mention it to him (but if you do, do it in a nochaluant manor, don't be angry or confrontational, remember he hasn't actually done anything wrong). To have a lasting marriage, you need to be able to communicate with eachother. Best of luck.
2006-12-29 18:50:41 · answer #2 · answered by Mandy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it's a real business convention you would be able to go also. This is the most used up excuse in the world, I mean, what are the odds on that, he contacts her, and all of a sudden he has business in the exact area. Really? Find a caregiver for your kids and tell him that you will be joining him there. See what he says to that.
2006-12-29 18:46:32 · answer #3 · answered by artist-oranit.com. 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have a right to be suspicious. I would tell him about your concerns before he leaves town. I wouldn't mention you're aware of the secret messages. Just tell him you've noticed his behavior is different and you're getting a bad vibe. Then monitor the myspace site and see what he's telling her. You can hope for the most innocent scenario but be prepared for the worst.
2006-12-29 18:50:30 · answer #4 · answered by CA DIVA 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs to let this go. We all wonder about ex'es but you know what, the reality is that he made a life and family with you, and that wasting even one minute on her is energy spent in the wrong space. Ask him what if? So what if he contacts her, what's his plan? He hasn't really thought this through, but if he does he will realize he's barking up the wrong tree.
2006-12-29 18:48:43 · answer #5 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you know all this for a fact? If it is a fact, then by all means have a talk with him. Ask him what are his intentions. It seems that sooner or later you're going to have to tell him to make a choice. You may be concerned about the other woman....but realize this....HE is the one who has the commitment to you...not her. I only wish you the best of luck.
2006-12-29 18:46:54 · answer #6 · answered by cajunrescuemedic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't be comfortable. I wouldn't confront him about it in an aggressive way, but definitely talk to him about it. Tell him you know he is being sneaky with his messages to her and it is unacceptable. He is a grown man with a family. He needs to act like it. Come right out and ask him how he feels about your relationship and if there is anything you two need to work on and build from there.
2006-12-29 18:47:16 · answer #7 · answered by A T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's sending her "secret" messages, then you DO have a reason not to trust him. I would confront him and put an end to this nonsense. Otherwise, you might be on the outside looking in.....
2006-12-29 20:40:34 · answer #8 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
then you need to talk to him. a lot of women say that its ok for men to do this and that and something else and that it shouldnt bother you, but my theory is if it make YOU uncomfortable then you need to talk about it. I would be bothered by this. why talk to your ex all of a sudden out of nowhere? thats kind of strange. I occasionally talk to the odd ex of mine, but I have ever since we split before my husband and I even got together to its not like its out of the blue and my ex is in another country. I would be a little suspecious, but just ask him about it. if he loves and respects you then it shouldt be a problem for him to explain to you whats going on.
2006-12-29 19:31:16 · answer #9 · answered by Jenn ♥Cadence Jade's mum♥ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask him what his intentions are.
Then ask him why he is secretly writing her! Show him what you know. And wait for a response.
Don't be surprised if he acts shocked and refuses to admit any of it.
If you're that worried about him, hire a detective or leave him.
2006-12-29 18:46:12 · answer #10 · answered by domesticgoddess 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course because he's married so why must he secretly send her messages through her my space page. Ask him about this.
2006-12-29 18:46:11 · answer #11 · answered by foxy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋