Ok i'm 22 year old and i'm 7 weeks, my boyfriend is 24, he will be 25 in feb and i'll be 23 in aug when the baby is due. but we really think we should give it up for adoption. but i want to keep it. he said that we will not leave if i want to keep it. but i know he will be mad if that is what i pick. and on top of that his family feels the same way. his mother works with adoption and he was adoped and his brother to. but my family is all about keeping it. what should i do?
2006-12-29 10:11:14 · 22 answers · asked by crissy2422 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
DO what your heads tell you, Speaking from experience, it is all great and good to think dreamily how fabulous it would be to have a baby in your life that you and you're boyfreind made, But think about the baby .... Can you support it/Will you be happy being tied down? Can you financially support it ? being your age I am sure you like to go out have fun etc etc ( yes I know you are probably saying but my family will be ther to take care of the baby and you can go out and do whatever, but remember this is your baby not someone else till you decide it is someone elses) there are so many factors you need to think about...
But above all don't do something to make other ppl happy that makes things worse.
it is not a desicion to enter into lightly no matter which way you go
if you do decide to go adoption, pick an agency that has it where you can go through hundreds ( even thousands ) of potential mommies and daddies and pick your babies parents, that is what made it easier for me, also depending on the agency you can, chose the level of "openess" the adoption will be ( meaning you can ask to see the baby every now and then or get pictures etc etc Somebirthmoms and adoptive families get along so well the birth mommy is so involved they see the baby eeryday even holidays)
I pesonally wanted it to be a little less open if I write them I can get pictures, but I thought it would be best to let him live his life with his new family.
I can only reitterate that this is not a desicion for your family but for you and your boyfriend
but think long and hard and do not let them push you into making a descion you will not be happy with.
I thought about keeping my son and I did for a week, and all the ppl that said they would be there for me, weren't and I was alone, and my boyfriend of X years didn't even spend time with me and my son and when it cam down to it... I had to tell my brother & other ppl and followed thru with what I needed to do for the best interest of everyone the one thing you want is to be happy you gave life and gave a couple a chance to have a baby of there very own, and not be resentful of the life you didn't get to lead/live
SO now that was long winded , you probably knew all this, but really don't do what the people who won't be raising him want , do what you need to do for yourself
2006-12-29 10:47:57 · answer #1 · answered by drkbabe73 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You still have a while to think about this. But whatever you decide you have to be absolutely sure that this is what you want to do. Having a child is very very hard work and your life will never be the same again. But if you give up your child that will be a decision you'll have to live with forever. You have to make this choice but be sure to choose what you feel is right for you and your baby, not what everyone else thinks you should do.
2006-12-29 10:18:26 · answer #2 · answered by Tink 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a HUGH decision where you need to consider so many factors. Are you able to care for the child? Emotionally and financially? Will you have support despite the way the fathers family feels? Although a young adult, you are an adult and responsible for your choices and decisions. Will you be able to feel good about your choice if you give up your child? Can you provide love? Are you mature and responsible? I recommend looking for some support from some prefessionals who can help to answer some of your questions and support you through the entire process! Good luck.
2006-12-29 10:22:18 · answer #3 · answered by shazi 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep your baby if you want to! I had my son at 19 and my boyfriend wasn't even present for the birth. He dumped me..but things ended up okay without him. He and his family are not involved in any way. My son is now 2 years old and life couldn't be better! Keep in mind that if you're having doubts about giving your child up for adoption..you may have horrible heartache after those papers are signed.
2006-12-31 07:55:21 · answer #4 · answered by Lindsey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk to your boy friend and even go for some consulting, your baby is not a pet. it is a human being that you are bringing it to this world.
I think you 2 are adult and have to make your own mind, no matter what your family do or think.
If I was you I would marry my baby's father and keep the baby, but I can not tell you to do so, since I have no idea about your situation.
but I think you have to make it clear between you 2 before doing anything.
Good luck
Iam sure giving up your baby will not be easy. but good luck with whatever you do.
2006-12-29 10:47:01 · answer #5 · answered by Me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-28 16:22:02 · answer #6 · answered by nocera 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The decision needs to be made as to what will be best for the BABY when it arrives. Not your wants not your boyfriends wants. Are you emotionally and financially capeable of raising a child, putting that child through college and everything that comes with having a child? If you're not then it would probably be best to give the child up
2006-12-29 10:42:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do what you feel is right i was 23 when i had my daughter she know is 4 and her dad and i are married and own a beautiful home and we bought were very unsure about it but if he's a real man he will stand by you and the both of you will do well i wish you the best in the new year !
2006-12-29 11:21:01 · answer #8 · answered by julyerie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You called the baby "my baby" and you said you wanted to keep the baby. That's what you should do. Your boyfriend can be a part of the baby's life if he wants or not if he doesn't but he has no right to force you to give it up. It's your baby it doesn't matter how old you are and your already attached to the baby. Your boyfriend needs to learn to take responsibility for his actions and its not his parents decision.
2006-12-29 10:27:00 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh honey~ the h*ll with him and what he thinks.... If you feel like you are ready and that your family is willing to help you out, don't worry! If you really think you are financially stable and can raise a baby do what your heart tells you to. A baby will definitely be a life changing experience but you can't handle it. God would not have given you this baby if He felt like you weren't ready. Woman can go through endure anything in life, WE ARE STRONGER THAN MEN!
2006-12-29 10:16:46 · answer #10 · answered by MaMa2aCrazyBabyBoy 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋