What shall one do if I I LOVE 2 woman? I am a faithful husband but my SOUL is splitting in 2. I´m goin crazy?

Question

I met a girl at work as my co-worker. It has been 2 years. At the begging I thought it was just office tension. But I have started to fall for her emotionally. I feel bad but I can not avoid feeling more for her as time goes on. I know she feels the same. When you see someones eyes and body language you can read clearly sometimes. We our good friends, we have not had sex. But I want to spend more time with her. I feel I am in love with 2 woman. What would you do?

Answer 1

I can't really tell you what to do; no one here can. I can tell you a couple of things though. If you are THAT attracted to someone else, something is missing in your relationship with your wife. Before you make a mess of your job and your marriage, why not talk to your wife about couple's counseling? You're on a dangerous path right now if you still have feelings for your spouse, but keep thinking about this other woman too. If you didn't care for your wife I'd tell you to leave her, but that's not what you are saying. You can save your marriage if you commit to it now, and if your wife is willing to work harder to make it better. Tell her the truth, in fact. Tell her that you are finding it hard to ignore other women. You haven't been unfaithful, but you need to put her on alert that this is a SERIOUS problem for BOTH of you.
My husband wouldn't listen when this started happening to me, and we are OVER now. The less he cared, the more I cared for the other guy.
Please note: I am taking your word for it that this is love, not lust we are talking about. If you are just hot for this woman, take a cold shower and stop being melodramatic about it.

Answer 2

Marraige vows should be taken seriously. Everyone will be tempted at one time or another during a marraige. What weeds the true men from the boys and the little girls from the women are what you do when you are tempted. You are MARRIED and your wife should come first before all other women. You need to stop where you are. Get another job. Move. STOP!
Also, if I was the woman in your office( which I never would be) I would never be able to trust you..If you are the kind of man that would leave his wife, or cheat on his wife for some temptation...you would probably do it again, and again. What sort of woman wants a man like that? Where would your integrity be? And if you are even LOOKING at a woman who would try and come onto a married man and ruin his marraige..what sort of woman is SHE and why would a man want to be with her?
Take your vows seriously. Grow up and stop being led by your pe**s, and be true to your wife and get the other woman OUT of your life!
Applause to Kendrick...that's the words of a real man!

Answer 3

You're a selfish SOB and if you think you're a "faithful" husband because you haven't committed the physical act of adultery then you are only lying to yourself. You've convinced yourself that you're "in love" with another woman from work who hasn't audibly told you she's interested in you. Even if she did, what kind of person would she be to have an affair with a man she KNOWS belongs to another woman. Even if the two of you got together, what kind of relationship would the two of you have? Your entire relationship would be based on lies and deceit and the ONLY one getting hurt is your poor unsuspecting wife. What's wrong with your wife? You say you're in love with "2" women which says you still love your wife. Well, if you're thinking about having an affair or leaving your wife for another woman then you really don't love your wife. You're a jerk and a jackass and I feel so sorry for your wife. The best thing you can do is WAKEUP AND REALIZE WHAT A WONDERFUL WOMAN YOU'RE ALREADY MARRIED TO, GO HOME TO HER AND THANK HER FOR STAYING MARRIED TO YOUR SORRY BEHIND FOR SO LONG! You need to end your so-called friendship with this other woman immediately. Otherwise, I hope your wife takes you to the proverbial cleaners and you and this other woman are left without a pot to p*ss in! Btw, you also need to seriously give consideration to YOU having to face YOUR WIFE being with another man, too. Do you think if you divorce your wife that another man isn't going to realize what a gem she is and scoop her up? Right now you're only thinking about yourself, but you should think about what the downside and consequences of your idiotic fantasies about this other woman will be!

Answer 4

quickly evaluate your marriage and how you would feel if you lost it cause it could happen in a split second with this kind of stuff, thats number one and second when you are married I believe you made a commitment and also at heart i'm sure you loved your wife therfore it should be your responsability and choice to not allow yourself to fall for someone else, I mean being good friends and being very fond of someone is ok and seeing things in them you could see enjoying are reasonable but its up to you to limit where you let your feelings go, but maybe you've allowed yourself to do this because your marriage is not fulfilling enough to you which you also there have to learn to be satisfied with some aspects to get others, give and take kinda thing anyways the point is evaluate your marriage and go from there if you want to proceed this new relationship I recommend ending the first one before starting another or atleast making it public somehow seems that theres alot less anger there in divorce when its not directly because of another person, partners seem to feel very bitter resentful when partners cheat during the marriage and then they really sock it to you as far as assets and dirty tricks, if you dicide to keep the marriage theres nothing wrong with telling this other girl that you were confused about yourself and what you wanted or were missing in your life and you reevaluated it and your sorry for leading her on with flirting or body language but your not able to or willing to act on anything and woud like to make sure it stays as friends just incase she was thinking anything different because she might be thinking somewhere down the road something may have come of it so you'll have to let her know you've changed you rmind, or persue it and let her know you need to take care of your marriage in the proper way before getting to involved as she would have you do with her out of respect, which i'm sure in the end she will respect that you were mature enough and honorable enough to do so and wont be worried that you might treat her that way as well, good Luck KiM

Answer 5

you are in love with you because that's who you are trying to please.when you are in love with some one you will avoid any situation that could be a problem.One time a few years back I got a chance to spend some time with some one who I use to think I loved.There was a time I would have jumped to be with this person,well the chance came about when I was involved with some one else and although we were many miles apart as i was on vacation and my b/f would have never known,I chose not to let anything happen and I didn't allow myself to be alone with this old love that I am still good friends with,because I didn't think my b/f would do that to me.I was glad I chose that and even though he never knew why I didn't show,I was glad that I respected my present relationship enough to be respectful.Today I am trying to break up with that same b/f,but I don't regret not being a cheat.

Answer 6

Ask yourself what is missing in each woman that makes them not enough by themselves. If that doesn't help, ask why YOU need two women. What is going on in your marriage? What have you lost with your wife? Is it the newness and excitement of someone who doesn't know your faults? Is your wife distant? Sex gone? She doesn't treat you the same? Why did you marry her years ago? Recall how she made you feel back then. Is she still making you feel that way...or is the office woman doing that now? This one you have to answer yourself.

Answer 7

If you are married, you cannot be in love with someone else. Someone is going to get hurt. How do you think your wife would feel knowing that you're in love with someone else? Someone has to go, and it's up to you to make the right choice. If you're TRULY falling for your co-worker and you want to be with her, you need to tell your wife about this; unless you want her to hear it from someone else. You can't go behind her back with this woman. Break it off with someone; before u hurt them more.

Answer 8

Have one of your guy friends slap you and tell you to snap out of it. Be a man, not emotionally confused. You are married, and don't compromise that with some sudden misconstrued feeling of emotion with someone else. You can't truelly love 2 people at the same time, in a romantic way.

Answer 9

Keep it to yourself for starters. I can tell you what will happen. Unless you plan on being polygamous there's no point in it. Your wife will be upset and you might end up losing both your loves in the end. If you want to lose your wife, keep going for the coworker. Unless your all about lies and deciet it's not going to work, and I can tell by your post that you feel guilty already. Trust me. It might work, you might be able to keep your wife in the dark for awhile, but before long one or the other is going to get jealous. Sparks will fly. Someone will get hurt.

Answer 10

I think you need some time to be alone. Take vacation for a week or two, try not to think about any of your problems during that time, by the end of this time you will have more power to face the problems and make right deceision.

P.S. just go alone on vacation : )