Anger: it is such a very destructive mental/emotional state which we all suffer from in our lives! How does...

Question

a person successfully learn to overcome anger ?
For anger puts us all into an irrational state of mind, which makes it impossible to perceive things, people, situations clearly. It clouds are judgment, leading us to say and do things, which not only do harm to others but to ourselves inwardly especially.
"What can we do to successfully overcome this very destructive mental/emotional state of anger, which keeps us from remaining in control of ourselves ?"

ANSWER: There is an Excellent book out

called, "Working with Anger." This book is

written by Thubten Chodron. It is encouraging,

informative, and very helpful for anyone who

ever given into the destructive mental state of

Anger. It teaches all the alternatives to anger, &

how to successfully produce these alternative

mental and emotional states, which bring lasting

self-control and peace of mind. It also show us

how to successfully cultivate Loving-kindness,

Compassion, & Wisdom !!

Thank You.

There have been some excellent answers which will help us all
with anger, and to help others who
struggle with anger. Thanks.

I do not rate the answers to my questions, and I allow the community to
choose a best answer. Points are not important to me.

Thanks again for all Sound, helpful
Answers.

Happy New Years to all of You !!

Answer 1

yoga works wonders ..

:]

Answer 2

A book can show us the path, but we have to do the hard work of not indulging ourselves in the emotion of anger when it arises. It is difficult not to act on an angry impulse, but it is necessary to minimize impulsive angry action. Remembering and applying the Golden Rule on the fly is a good way to start. Think of what your anger makes you want to do, then think of someone doing that thing to you. Consider your probably responses and repercussions. Go beyond the immediate and think of the chain of events an angry action would set in motion. Then be thankful that you did not act in the time it took you to breathe a few times and think. It isn't easy, but if we are to survive in close proximity with a multitude of other humans, it is an absolutely vital skill.

Answer 3

The American Psychological Association and the American Anthropological Association, recently conducted research and, conducted with the benefit of the fully-mapped human genome, has begun to pinpoint specific genes that increase the risk of socially harmful behavior such as aggressiveness, anti-social behavior, suicide,drug abuse etc.

Psychologists recommend a balanced approach to anger, which both controls the emotion and allows the emotion to express itself in a healthy way.

Examples of which are:

Direct, such as not beating around the bush, making behavior visible and conspicuous, using body language to indicate feelings clearly and honestly, anger directly at persons concerned.
Honorable, such as making it apparent that there is some clear moral basis for the anger, being prepared to argue your case, never using manipulation or emotional blackmail, never abusing another person’s basic human rights, never unfairly depowering the weak or defenseless, taking responsibility for actions.
Focii, such as sticking to the issue of concern, not bringing up irrelevant material.
Persistent, such as repeating the expression of feeling in the argument over and over again, standing your ground.
Courageous, such as taking calculated risks, enduring short term discomfort for long term gain, risking displeasure of some people some of the time, taking the lead, not showing fear of other’s anger, standing outside the crowd and owning up to differences, using self-protective skills.
Passionate, such as using full power of the body to show intensity of feeling, being excited and motivated, acting dynamically and energetically, initiating change, showing fervent caring, being fiercely protective, enthusing others.
Creative, such as thinking quickly, using more wit, spontaneously coming up with new ideas and new views on subjects.
Forgiving, such as demonstrating a willingness to hear other people’s anger and grievances, showing an ability to wipe the slate clean once anger has been expressed.
With regard to interpersonal anger, Dr. Fiendler recommends[1] that people try, in the heat of an angry moment, to see if they can understand where the alleged perpetrator is coming from. Empathy is very difficult when angry, but it can make all the difference in the world. Isn't it frequently the case that when we get intensely angry at someone, the next day we feel guilty to some degree? We may say to ourselves something like, "You know, they did have a point. I sort of over-reacted." Taking the other person's point of view can be excruciating when in the throes of anger, but with practice it can become second nature.
Try to listen carefully to what is being said to you. Anger creates a hostility filter, and often all you can hear is negatively toned.
Buddhists, on the other hand, recommend a slightly different approach. They believe that there are several antidotes for handling anger, the chief amongst them are: patience, understanding karma, equanimity, and realization of emptiness.


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Answer 4

Self Control. Simple as that. Everyone has the power to control themselves.

PS Why are you answering your own question?

Answer 5

Anger sucks, that's why I became a Shiranic Holy Monk. When I worship the great Shiran (may his Pontifical Name be exalted and adored with rabid fanaticism) my anger melts into the oblivion of his Narcissus HOLY charisma.

Answer 6

anger is not necessarily a bad thing and its a normal human emotion....uncontrolled, unwarranted anger is a bad thing.....righteous anger is a very good thing and a great motivator for doing good.

Answer 7

Anger is really a fear. We need to find out why we are so angry. We need to face our fears. COunting to ten to cool down works for me so I do not make stupid mistakes when angry.

Answer 8

Are you asking question or promoting this book?

Anger is one of stages to cope with stressor in our life...
You need to handle them differently...

Answer 9

So you ask a question and give us the answer. I don't think this is what YA is for.

Answer 10

You answered your own question?