is it ok for a husband to always say he needs space when space has been provided please read deatails?

Question

my husband goes out all the time with out kids for at least a hour are two a week i am a fool time student at night and i understand he needs the space so i will take are 4 children out of the house for him i ask him were he is going and when he will be back because i worry but lately he is needing more time and i gave that to him last week when he got off early to go christmas shopping for 3 hours all by himself but this week i gave him a hour last night since he had such a busy day and he needed it so today he was going out he says i have to go to the next town to go out not in town then i say that i am going to same town lets meet up later with the kids have family time he says no i whant me time i never have me time i say but you did just yesterda he says i was on computer so i need help to say am i giving him time,,,he hates asked were going his stops were he will be at and what time be home ,,,, please help

Answer 1

your husband has the luxury of being a lodger in his own home,,you are a family not a single parent and what is this 'me time' crap,,,,what about you,,you take all four kids out of his way so he can have some peace,,if he wanted to be single and without responsibilities he shouldnt have got married and had children and sooner or later you are going to blow,,where is his respect for you? he is a spoiled brat and you are acting like a scared mother who is afraid to demand he acts like a husband and father,,if you spend more time together as a family having fun as you suggest he will learn to see fun can be had,,at present you are treating yourself like a second class person,,you are permitting him to say you are less important than him,you are implying you can cope with this life,you and he need help and you need to talk because things like this breed resentment and hatred and he is supposed to be a man not a child who needs naptime,,he doesnt get to cop out of his life and still reap the benefits,,,,and i know this is pushing it but il say it anyway,,,i bet you still make sure he is fed and clean clothed too dont you,make his poor life easier than it already is.where do you come in?who looks after you?

Answer 2

Well hon it sounds to me like you have alot on your plate. To be quite honest I would really start to wonder about all this "me time" he seems to need. If I were you I would have a friend or family member look after the kids for awhile when he has his "me time" and follow him, or if you aren't able to do that (no vehicle etc) then have a trusted friend or family member check and see that there isn't anything else going on other than his "me time" make sure he's not spending his time with someone else.

Having said that, be very discrete about this, because if he is just kickin' it with his friends then you don't want to act like you are overly suspicious of him, so keep the "spying" on him on the d/l. The thing that stands out in your story is that he says he has to go to another town, that is a big red flag right there, at least it would be for me. That in itself sounds awfully suspicious.

Best of luck honey and I really hope I'm wrong!

Answer 3

All people need their space, and it is good to give it to them.
But,
I do not know the cirumstances of your marrige, but I do know that Many men warrant the attitude of the better half wanting to know where they are. How close an eye you keep on him should be defined by what kind of " past history " does he have.

If he warrants it call him, ask him where he is , he should have no problem telling you Exactly.
. And for the men out there , some of us don' t have the best track record, so we need to encourage our wives to call .
Personally I think its cool,
It's lunch time and i just got off the phone with my wife, we call each other many times a day. Trust is a wonder ful thing

Answer 4

hang on, get a e book noted as "the 5 love languages", have him examine it too. they placed it in a brown coated e book now so he would not ought to get stuck examining a red e book. This e book is impressive, i have had friends tell me in the journey that they could've had this e book even as they were given married, they'd nevertheless be married. I supply it to all and multiple that receives married. this is cheep and effective. on the different end, you may want to favor to bounce into "personality plus", yet another e book which will blow your doors off so some distance as why he's like he's. you also locate out why you're like you're. I extremely recomend you verify those books out ASAP.

Answer 5

I don't think that a couple of hours a week to himself is a problem. I assume that while you are at school, he watches the children, correct? He probably also works full time too. I would let him have his "Me" time, but I would also take some "Me" time for yourself.

Answer 6

No, your not giving him space he needs, He said you gave that time to him. You don't give anyone orders and that is what your doing when you say, I gave him that time, your trying to be a ruler
and give him what you think he ask for. Your not his mother, your his wife you don't give some one permission and then get upset when he says no, I need time for myself. You don't know he may have been going to get you Christmas present, you are wrong and I don't blame him. If someone I'm going to give you this time, I would say no you aren't giving me a damn thing I'm taking this time. You see you are so wrong but just don't get it, do you?.

Answer 7

You're a fool (full) time student? I don't believe it!

Yeah, it's normal. And, also, I'm only hearing one side of the story... not his. You need to be a little less controling of hubby and give him some serious space.

By the way... It's also normal to use correct grammar, syntax and punctuation.

Answer 8

If you are a fool tyme student, you neeed yor space too. I hope that yoo can find the tyme to git yur space. Yoo can work out the deatales latur. Us mens need our space to chill out with homies and shooot puul. Have a good new yeer.

Answer 9

sounds as if is seeing someone else, that's why he needs all this space and time. that's also why he goes to the next town, as not to be seen, or maybe that's where she lives. certainly doesn't sound too normal at all, he must have a mistress that's why he needs his space.

Answer 10

Seems like something/ONE else is keeping him busy. When a man is involved in activities that he dont care to share and you cant ask him about, that's a light bulb right there.