He cheated on me and I don't know how I should be handling it. I really don't know what to do.?

Question

Everyone keep telling me I'm too calm. I've been hurt so much I just can't seem to express my feelings around others. But when I'm alone I break down.

Answer 1

leave him.

Answer 2

First of all, I can't imagine how much it hurts. Being calm in public is fine, but don't be afriad to feel. It hurts, and crying is only natural. With cheating comes the feeling of being betrayed. It doesn't matter what the situation was - if he really truly loves you then he wouldn't have cheated. Time to move on and find a guy that will give you the love you deserve. It may hurt in the meantime - but that's life. No one ever said it was easy

Answer 3

Take deep breaths...and if everyone keeps saying that you're calm and you know you're not really, then prove it. Invite over some of your close friends and just belt it out. If anyone says that they're getting sick of your pittiness, remember that they're not really true.
And about your ex-boyfriend. If he couldn't give you any compassion worth keeping...then why waste your time on someone who isn't willing to spend all of their time on you? I mean really who cares about this boyfriend anymore, and don't second guess yourself and don't push yourself so much to be everything that he wants. Remember and keep in mind every day and every minute of every day that he doesn't deserve you. And with that being said, you're waaaaaaay too good for him.
And really, when you're alone it's good to belt it all out and break down. But it's best to do something FOR yourself instead of TO yourself. Like go get a manicure or pedicure and go shopping with some of your girlfriends and go get some icecream with your mom. And if it helps...call him up and tell him what a loser he is for cheating on you. But don't cry. Forbid you cry in front of him...
That's all that i have though. The rest is up to you and anything else that someone can think up. just don't keep yourself down, gradually pull up!

Answer 4

Your calmness might still be the shock of it happening.When my ex cheated on me I was calm on the outside but wanted to destroy her and him on the inside.I gave her another chance that was dumb she just took me over for more.I was married you do not say if you were or not.But either way if you are married or not you do not need him so get rid of the bum as soon as you can and don't look back because its true what they say once a cheater allways a cheater.Good Luck and if you ever want to talk about it just email me I am a good listener.Because I have been there.

Answer 5

I have been there, and I understand what you are gong through. I felt foolish in other peoples eyes, it hurt my pride, but I could not show it cause then i would feel they thought I was week. I always had this feeling that he was a cheater, he would look at other girls right in front of me and talk about women he saw on TV and their clothes, hair body etc. After being married for 7 years I found out he had cheated two times and I divorced him! I will never let myself feel that way in a relationship again. I learned allot. Hope this helps!

Answer 6

I can understand exactly how you feel.. I've been in the same situation as you. I've been hurt so many times and I just dont seem to be affected by it in public but when im alone I cry my eyes out. And now, I cant trust anyone at all. I feel soo lost. but the best thing to do is, get to know yourself, do things u love to do on your own for a while, go out with ur girls and just enjoy life. AND leave his ***. :)

Answer 7

do you love him? Is he remorseful? Does this appear to be something in his nature? Has he done it before? These are questions you need to ask yourself....cheating isn't an end all to a relationship...but, it's certainly close. Only you can decide hom much this relationship is worth to you. No matter what though, DON"T let him tell you that his cheating his some how your fault. IF he does that.....no question leave him.

Answer 8

everybody deals with things differently. i don't like breaking down in front of anyone else either. you deal with it in the way you feel is best. give yourself sometime to deal with the betrayal before making any permanent decisions. see a counselor if you think it will help you. from there, just take it one day at a time and the right decisions will come to you.

Answer 9

u have been hurt so much u tend to hide feelings, and not speak up for your rights. so if he cheated on u, u deserve the truth, if u don't confront it he will keep doing it to u, sometimes when we do confront they leave us, got to be prepared for either outcome here, but stand up for yourself, cheating is something no one has to accept, if he leaves u than he didn't love u as much as u thought he did, and maybe is best.

Answer 10

It took my husband to leave his ex-wife 3 times of her cheating on him. NOW that is CALM. You are going to end up putting yourself into such an emotional depression, and you are going to end up hurting yourself, or someone else. Please go get some counseling, and focus on what is truly important here. (WHICH IS YOU SWEETY!) You'll bounce back before you know it. My husband and I are happily together 3.5 years now. And he has realized that true love KNOWS there ARE boundries! (Meaning, if they truly love you, they would never do something that horrible to hurt you, period.)

Answer 11

Need more info, how old are you how long have you been together, are you married, do you have kids. That makes a big difference, but a cheater can be forgiven, under the right circumstances