This question is for the men....?

Question

I know this question has been asked multiple times but I didn't think it applied to me until this morning. If my husband has been looking at porn without me knowing it, is it a sign of things to come? Like an affair? It seems like I am more interested in sex than he is most of the time. I guess now I know why. Any advice would be appreciated. Please be nice, I feel like someone has kicked me in the stomach.

Answer 1

Princess, all guys look at porn, some will not admit it, but I do not think your man loves you any less, I do not think that he craves anything outside the marriage, I look at porn, been married for 9 years and never cheated, I have a great relationship, I am very much in love. I just like to look at the stuff from time to time, the wife found my stuff and I had some explaining to do (embarrasing) anyways she knows I have it, but I am very discrete about it.
Do not read too much into it, there are more serious threats to a relationship than porn.

Answer 2

This is a completely natural thing. Guys look at porn. There is no stopping that. Don't worry it is NOT that he doesn't find you attractive any more, he is just looking at exploring "forbidden" things.

This isn't a sign that he is going to cheat on you.

My suggestion is to be open about it. Maybe one day start watching one before he comes home and just let it play out that way. If that sounds like too bold a move, just suggest to rent one and watch it together. Make sure you two talk about how hardcore you want to go. Make sure it isn't going to be something that scares you.

Also try to role play like they do in the films.

But over all. I know it feels like he is "cheating" on you now. However, porn is something every guy looks at. Do not take it personally and just have fun with it. (Don't accuse him of anything or put him down, that could be damaging in the long run.)

Just don't read too much into it. It will all work out for the better.

Answer 3

I had to get help to get me off the porn trap. I never really understood why I was doing it as I'M happily married with a great sex life. I saw a therapist that specialized in sexual behavior and that really helped. I also got a self help book called Every mans battle and that taught me about why I did some of the things I did.
I will say that us men are highly visual and now that my wife understand what makes us tick, she started dressing real sexy when we are alone and that took away the urge to look else where. I have helped some of my friends stop it too.

Answer 4

No, it doesn't necessarily mean an affair.
It may just be that he doesn't know how to communicate effectively through either emotions or through sex. It may take some coaxing from you to get him to open up a bit and talk about what pleases him in the bedroom so that he feels more comfortable.
I don't think this situation is that rare, so unless you have other proof leading you to believe an affair is imminent, don't assume that that's what is happening.
Good luck .

Answer 5

unfortunately this is not unusual and men both married and single like to watch porn, there is a fifty percent chance that it means nothing and there is a fifty percent chance you should be worried,
from experience I can tell you being a man I don't watch porn often unless I personally feel I'm missing something at home.
Now men are extremeley visual, and always want and desire sex and often have a sexual desire that you may not be providing.

For me I would go on the internet to see women in RHT stockings and a gartebelt ans that was a turn on and my girlfriend did not wear those, when I told my girlfriend that that was a big turn on and why I watched porn, she started wearing the RHT stockings and garterbelt for me,

I no longer has much desire to seek that photography out on the internet

so May I suggest you be his porn

Answer 6

I personally like to fantasize about doing some of the things I see on the screen but would never subject my wife to some of it if she didn't find it acceptable. That is the enjoyment I get out of porn and get a lot of stimulation of my libido out of it. I am actually more interested after watching it. Maybe you need to watch it with him and then you will both be interested at the same time. Maybe you could pick the stuff you watch together so it is a little bit more tolerable for you to watch. Just some ideas. Don't look at it as a replacement for you, but as a supplement.

Answer 7

Porn is not that bad to look at if you are an adult.Maybe he is fantasising about what some of these girls are doing to guys.Are you adventurous in bed?Maybe you should spice it up a bit the same thing over and over again does get boring.I would not worry about an affair at this point talk to him and maybe experiment in bed you may find that you also enjoy things you thought you would ever do.

Answer 8

Nope it is totally normal. I used to feel the same about my husband looking at porn. But now I have learned that all guys do it and it's totally normal for them. What I do is watch it w/ him. Ask him what he would like to do. Change the routine. Be spontaneous. Be a freak in Bed but only in bed and watch what happens. My husband watches porn all the time but he has said that he enjoys it the most when I watch it w/ him because we get into it and it's really nice because it does not bother me. GOOD LUCK!

Answer 9

No, porn does not equate to an affair. I think it just means that he's intrested in looking at i for his own self gratification and I don't necessarily mean masturbation. I like looking at it and i've been married for over thrity years and still have a healthy sex life with my wife.

Answer 10

Porn is not an interest of mine (I liked it as a young teen), and I really see it as no big deal. These women are complete strangers and mean nothing. I don't think you should worry. Most of us fantasize whether we have pics or not. As far as his interest in sex goes, he may need to try something new with you, or he could just be masturbating a lot.