2006-12-29 02:49:30 · 30 answers · asked by molldeerogers 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
bad for all of you if you are not a happy family****
2006-12-29 03:01:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Definitely more harmful. I hate it when people say they stay together for the kids, because I think they use kids as an excuse. Kids can feel the love or the tension in the home. When the parents don't get along the child always ends up in the middle and feels the tension. I was raised be single mother who did a wonderful job. My dad was not a part of my life, his choice. I never felt like I was missing anything and we had a great life. I know people that grew up in an unhappy home and they can't say the same.
2006-12-29 10:58:06 · answer #2 · answered by dana j 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been married before and with child in that marriage and no its not a good idea just to stay together for the sake of the children. Sounds more like an excuse than anything else. Your kids pay the price emotionally when you and your s/o are splitting the sheets but stay together. You need to think of their needs long before you think of yours. Have you tried counseling with the kids?If you stay together for the sake of the kids who are you hurting? That should be an easy answer.
2006-12-29 11:02:49 · answer #3 · answered by J B 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
More harmful. Kids pick up on more than parents think. Living in an environment where the two parents fight all of the time and exist in a loveless marriage will do more harm to the children...especially if one of the parents starts having a relationship on the side. This teaches the kids that it is OK and that is what a normal relationship is like. It also prevents them from being children--they're so negatively affected by the tumultuous relationship that their parents have that they are forced to grow up way too quickly.
2006-12-29 10:55:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The one thing I have learned in life is yes the kids want the parents to stay together. My parents stayed together because of my brother and I. My whole life was filled with them fighting. The verbal abuse my father dealt my mother was just sickening. I always asked my mother why she stayed with my dad and she said " it was for us ." I on the other hand chose to not stay in my marriage just for the kids and I hear all the time " Mom why aren't you with daddy." In my opinion just from life experience it is harmful either way for the kids. Your happiness is also a factor in all this. Do you really want to live the one life you get unhappy? Think about it...
2006-12-29 11:05:50 · answer #5 · answered by Lucinda M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I stayed with my ex for a few years past when I should. We fought constantly and had a air of tension and anger in the house. I believe it hurt our children. Once we divorced and both became happy again, our kids felt much better. Although they wish we were together, they have adjusted to it and are much better off than if we stayed together.
Another reason it is bad, is because children learn what marriage means from the example they saw with their parents. If the parents are in a bad relationship, odds are the kids will be too.
2006-12-29 10:53:57 · answer #6 · answered by Xxar 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's more harmful for the kids. Kids learn from their parents. Would you want your kids learning from your marriage about how to act in their future relationships? They will. If the answer is an absolute "no", then split. Example, is one partner the complete ruler of the home? Is one adulterous? Do their fights become physical (especially in the presence of the kids)? Is one/are both parents an alcoholic/drug addict? Is there any other form of abuse between parents/toward children?
2006-12-29 11:10:44 · answer #7 · answered by Lady in Red 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have you tried counseling? How long have you been married? Tried working it out? Calling a truce? Don't just "leave" because you are unhappy NOW. Think about when you were happy and what has changed. The BEST solution is to work it out and move on. Is there any amicable way to stay together? Coming from a divorced home - I swore I would never divorce. There have been plenty of bad times, but now it's been 10 years and we are happier than the day we married. Work through it and the grass is definitely greener on the other side. I promise!
2006-12-29 11:00:10 · answer #8 · answered by lucki female 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
it could be both. helpful because u don't want to traumatizes the kids with a divorce, so u stay for the sake of the kids. then it could be harmful for all the yellings and all the misunderstandings between u and the husband.
2006-12-29 10:57:08 · answer #9 · answered by ivelisse 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It depends on your situation. If the kids are going to be around fighting and strife all the time than yes it's more harmful to stay in a marriage just for them. It's only hurting them. It's not easy getting a divorce with children, but it better to raise them in a peaceful eviorment. They will thank you for it in the long run.
2006-12-29 10:53:57 · answer #10 · answered by Q~T 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think it is more harmful to stay together, the kids know when its not right, and you are teaching them that this is the way marriage is . and they wont have healthy relationships when they are adults
I know iam divorced and that weighed on my mind for a long time before i finally made my decision.
2006-12-29 10:54:10 · answer #11 · answered by Orleanslady 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋