homework for 10th graders?

Question

my 10th grade daughter had 8 days of make up work( i got it for her before christmas break) now she goes back on tuesday, it is friday. I would like to "see" the work for myself to know she is caught up. but she says I should trust her that she gets it done. and that the teachers should give her another 8 days to finish turning in the make up work. the rule is they turn it missed homework how many days they were absent.
as her mom, should i just say "ok, you say you got it done. " or should I say " i would like to see what you are turning in"???

when she missed 1 or 2 days before this she said its hard for her to do the days homework and the makeup homework too. so i thought if i check it, i would know that she has the make up done and can consentrate on the new things coming this week.

her teachers say 10th graders need to do the work, we as parents can not do it for them. and i dont understand it anyways. i usually cant help with it. i leave it up to her to get done. Her teachers have also told me at conference time its up to HER to get the work turned in, and not me as a parent, that is why this is hard. im doing what the teachers said, putting the responsibility on my teenager. teachers say this is teaching them to rely on themselves and deadlines.
was looking for other parents with 10th graders and wondering what they do. My parents had 8 kids. we worked on homework but they didnt care about our grades, as long they were not d's or f's. c's were fine. none of us went to college all of us has minimum wage jobs, just getting by and all 8 of us just making enough to pay bills and keep from starving.
so whats so wrong with her telling me its done , shouldnt i believe her,?? shouldnt a parent believe their teenager(10th through 12th graders) her teachers say this.

Answer 1

You can take a peek or two but don't be hovering over shoulder seeing what she has done. If she uses a backpack you could put her stuff in it and take a peek then two. She seems like she really can trust you so don't lose that trust with her just over some make up work....I hope your problem is solved with my help!

Answer 2

Ask her politely to have a look at it none the less. If I had parents that cared then I would have been in a better place faster. The only thing that kept me from a Ivy league or top notch college was a stupid D in geometry in my sophomore year. That and money, but still in high school that is not the concern of most teens. I put pressure on myself to excel and got to where I'm at, but your teen is your business. As your business grows you need to keep a steady eye on the maturity and keep a hand on what is done with your business. She has a mind of her own and respect that, but your giving her the tools to succeed. After all one does not tell their boss "I have the work done trust me". No in all cases the boss would enforce his right to make sure its done to their liking. Be firm in your stance but don't be strict. Good luck and HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Answer 3

You didn't say what caused her to get behind in school. You are the Mom, and as such, you have every right to see her homework, or anything else. Are you afraid of making her mad? So what if she gets mad...she's a teenager..she's going to hate you every other day until she's at least 20! Be the parent, which is what she needs...she obviously needs some guidance (what kid doesn't?)...and you should give it to her. You guys can be friends when she's 25..right now she needs a MOM.

Answer 4

sounds as if the kid is being the parent here. if you want to be the parent then tell her you want to see it. if you want to be best friends then trust her. you can't be both.