We have been together for 4 1/2 years and married 4 months, and she says I'm not as romantic as I used to be. Help me out with some suggestions.
2006-12-28 23:12:11 · 14 answers · asked by fentro1 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
This is a question that is basically easy to understand when we understand some basics. Sounds like double talk right. Let me explain: A wife requires affection and a display of affection and a kind word will start the ball to rolling but what must happen is you will need to invest in a meaning-full conversation with her. Listen to her feeling and tell her yours. Remember that the way we hear is 7% words themselves 38% tone of voice and 55% non verbal. I believe it is a must to show her how much you care will start with how much you will truly listen to her
2006-12-28 23:28:24 · answer #1 · answered by Roger W 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are in trouble... but depending on how far you have been doing what you are doing that makes her feel that you are not as romantic as you used to be, you are not un-redeemable!
The best way forward is to start with the simple things, such as listening to her narrate how her day has been( try and look/sound interested). Surprise her with a breakfast in bed treat, or just call her up during lunch time and ask if you could have lunch together. Make these treats look and sound as natural as possible, so that she doesn't feel like you are up to something. Send her short text messages to say you were thinking about her, say, when you saw a dinner dress (it's just that you were too broke to afford it!), and sometimes just tell her a funny thing that happened at work or on your way home or something someone said to you, that will crack her up. Of course, don't try too hard The key thing here is to spend more time with her, and learn something more about her, then take advantage of it to make her happy. Success in your endeavours!
2006-12-29 07:30:08 · answer #2 · answered by aminimungu 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do the unexpected! Treat her like it's the first time you've kissed her, the first time you've held her hand, remember how you felt when you didn't see her for a while in the beginning, what would you do when you saw her?? Call her at work or home and ASK her out on a date, don't tell her where you're going, just tell her to look her best! You do the rest. Bring her a single rose, kiss her cheek, touch her in all the non sexual spots FIRST! How would you treat her on a first date and you wanted to make sure she wants to go out with you again. Apparently you know how.....she married you!!
2006-12-29 08:04:22 · answer #3 · answered by zekemarie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I can give you some examples of some things that were done for me that I have never forgotten. I was getting out of the shower once and my husband at the time was standing there with a towel that he had put into the dryer to get it hot. That was so nice. Sometimes I would wake up to hand picked roses that he would lay on my pillow, I would find poems that he wrote hisself about how much he loved me. oh and this one was really good. We got on his bike to go for a ride and there was my picture on the gas tank where he could see it while he was riding.
2006-12-29 10:08:37 · answer #4 · answered by *queenfairy1*Antioch California 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have great suggestions for things that you can DO. I like to hear what a man has on his mind - especially when it's about me.
Things that you SAY have quite an impact as women need romance to begin in their heads. Where men are more visual women tend to be more auditory and more tactile.
Tell her how she makes you feel, how lovely she looks in the shadows. Look into her eyes when you say it and mean every single word.
For me it's not about gifts. It's not about where you take me. I want you to come talk to me while I'm in the shower. Bring me a towel and a drink. Put on some music and dance with me. Whisper my name in my ear.
You don't need to spend a dime on me. You only need to look deep into my eyes and tell me what you see.
Look at your wife and be in awe of her. She is a wonderful work of art. When she sees that you adore her, are in absolute wonder, she will feel romanced. It won't matter where you are, what you buy her or how much you spend. she'll feel how much you love her and that's really all she's asking for.
2006-12-29 07:37:52 · answer #5 · answered by outdone 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Send her flowers at work where her co-workers can see her getting them, get off work early and prepare a candle lit dinner for her (do the clean-up also), give her foottrubs and back massages, ask her how her day was and make no mention of yours. It's the little things that add up with women. They remember everything, EVERYTHING. Oh, and if you can afford it, jewelry is always a winner. Especially if it's given for no other reason than the fact that you love her.
2006-12-29 07:18:48 · answer #6 · answered by tiptoesan 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
try to remember what it was that you did when you started dating. Maybe take her to the first resturant you went to together or take her where you proposed to her and have a picnic. It is easy to be romantic for your wife you just have to use your memory. a single bloom of her favorite flower with a hand written note tellng her how much you love her would go down a treat
2006-12-29 07:17:53 · answer #7 · answered by bonfireheat 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Listen, women need small things to feel appreciated...whatever you were doing when you guys were dating, go back to doing that...also remember that women have inherent fear that once they get married, the guys will start neglecting them (mostly true but not always) so try to understand that she may be sensitive about it right now...minor gestures such as complimenting her clothes, hair, etc..appreciating when she cooks or does anything around the house...and surprises..even for coffee goes a long way...small things..forget the fancy stuff...
2006-12-29 07:22:59 · answer #8 · answered by nirvana 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Time to take the charge card out and make up for lack of romantic issue. Send her flowers, buy her something lovely, take her to dinner and romance her the night away.
2006-12-29 07:17:31 · answer #9 · answered by Louisa R 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Help her clean the house, do the dishes, etc. Send her a card for no reason. Bring her flowers for no reason. Look in to her eyes and tell her how much you love her. Hold her hand when going someplace. Open doors for her. Be gentle and kind to her. Just look at her and smile...
2006-12-29 07:18:16 · answer #10 · answered by capnemo 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋