okay i am not trying to be crude here but this is how it happened...tell me what you think.
Me and my husband was in the middle of having sex and we talk dirty all the time. However this time he would not let it go. I was pleasuring him ( you know) and he stated " how would you like me getting some one over here to F$%$ you will you &&^# me?". At first i kinda of ignored it but he kept making refernence to it.
I think that was his way of asking for a threesome. And if I am correct do I go through with it. I am not scared of experimenting. We always try new things.
REAL answers please.
2006-12-28 21:46:18 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
no...I think he was just using it as a fantasy thing to excite you and obviously it excites him.....I would not pursue it...could turn out really bad...just let him talk....good luck
2006-12-28 21:48:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
It might have just been naughty talk during sex. There is a big difference between fantasy and reality.
The only way to know for sure though is to talk about it with him. Not while having sex and the hormones are coursing through your veins, but while you are sane and not horny. If you can't communicate openly about it under these conditions, than you're relationship isn't ready for it.
If the idea isn't as appealing "sexually sober" as it is in the height of passion, well then swinging (and yes, a threesome is technically swinging) probably isn't for you.
If is as appealing, well then you two need to talk about more. Why is it appealing? What are the terms of opening-up your relationship to others? What are your rules? What are your boundaries?
There are allot of answers on here already to the effect of "its a great way to get an STD." Well so is casual sex without the situation of a threesome. In fact, the instances of safe sex being practiced in the swinging lifestyle is far greater than that of non-swingers.
Also, some say things along the lines of "sex is for those you love also." Of course, I'm sure these people have had a one night stand in their life and are just being hypocrites. Or they practice "serial monogamy" where they "in love" with someone for a few months, bang like bunnies, then are suddenly not "in love" with them anymore and move on to the next boyfriend or girlfriend. These people are just kidding themselves, anyway.
Sex and love ARE two different things. What gets many couples into trouble, and divorce court, thinking they are the same. Five to seven years into the marriage ("the seven year itch") the lust wanes and they discover that other that good sex, they have little else in common. Sex goes along with love, it is not love.
Oh, and contrary to what the guy says above, in a MFM threesome there is rarely bisexual activity. This is his opinion, not fact. I've been in many and never once has there been any. All the attention was on the woman.
For more information on exactly what to talk about and how to go about it, check-out The Swingers Board's "Swinger Advice" and "FAQ" section (links below).
2006-12-29 05:59:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You will have to talk to him to make sure he is truly willing to do it, or if it was just an at the moment thing. If you both decide to do it, then I will strongly suggest it is talked about very carefully and some rules must be set. These rules should include what things are allowed and what things are not allowed. This will help you both in having an enjoyable experience, instead of something that upsets one or both of you. The details will be important - i.e. will you be allowed to kiss the other guy, will you be allowed to do oral to the other guy, will it be someone you both know or a "stranger", how do you handle the third person after sex, how to behave if you see the person in the street later on, etc.
2006-12-28 21:54:12 · answer #3 · answered by jasonheavilin 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You may not be scared of that,but aren't you just a little afraid of what it will do to your marriage?A threesome is not a good basis for a healthy marriage.To be honest with you,your marriage doesn't sound healthy now.Not necessarily because of you,although you are considering this threesome.But more of your husband.That wasn't something that he just though up,he's been thinking about this for a long time.And in my opinion,pornography is playing a big role in this.That may even be alright with you,but that too is a recipe for a unhealthy marriage.Although he probably would say different.Don't do it.Especially if you value your marriage.
2006-12-29 11:13:58 · answer #4 · answered by Willnotlietoyou 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you want to try it, you should. My husband and I have threesomes all the time. Both of us had done it before we ever even met. So, when we did finally meet and get together, we had that in common.
Some of these people here don't understand that sex isn't always
about making love. Sometimes you just have to have fun with it.
It would probably be better if you started off with one of his friends.
I am sure he already has someone in mind. That way if you do decide to go through with it, it will be someone you are comfortable with. If you don't feel comfortable with it at any point. you need to tell your husband that that kind of lifestyle isn't for you. If he loves you, he will understand.
2006-12-28 23:04:18 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Dear Rose P,
Are you sh_tting me? How would you like to experience a STD you can't get rid of? Sex is great but you people are to kinky for me (in fact you scare the hell out of me), medically when you have sex with someone you are having sex with everyone they've had sex with. I'm glad you asked for adults only because children like yourselves need to be educated. Why don't you just go and buy a big Dick and some KY Jelly (he can Fu_k you until the cows come home while your sucking him off)? One thing for sure is that both of you need to read about STD's. I hope you read this carefully for your healths sake!
2006-12-28 22:27:16 · answer #6 · answered by beamer 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Real Sex is best when it is based on Love. Love is between 2 people only. Not multiple people. Plus having a threesome could lead to him liking the 3rd person more than you both sexually or non-sexually. You really wanna risk everything just to get your jollies with 1 more person?
2006-12-28 21:49:09 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Nice. Well, I asked my wife for a 3 way as well. She wasn't all that jacked about it but one night the time was right (her and gf drinking) and her best friend, her and I all got in our huge jetted tub for a bubble bath and petting. It didn't take that long before my wife was between her legs, spreading that flower open and diving in. That was the start of the most incredible night of my life. I highly recommend going along with it. Now for the warning. My relationship with this other girl went through some tough times before we were able to work it out. second, if he wants to have a mmf 3way, he is bi-curious. Are you ok with your husband smoking a pole?
2006-12-28 21:53:30 · answer #8 · answered by m-t-nest 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
No Sex is to be for the man and the woman partner only. The one girl and one guy. I can't really say anything because I would probably try it but you can make the choice. If you are asking this over the internet you probably don't want to. Your choice good luck.
2006-12-28 23:05:51 · answer #9 · answered by almost married 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
This is a totally personal thing between you and your spouse. If it were me, I would say No as I do not share. I wouldn't want to involve someone else into our personal lives because you wouldn't know what they have or what or how far they would go. Once you start that, then how much more would you / he need to pleasure each other, would just that work, etc.... ie... Once you have one, then one more, then what else would you need, What is too far.??? One man = One woman for me. To me that is the way God intended it.
2006-12-28 21:52:30 · answer #10 · answered by Stephanie F 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Hi Rose, first of all you need to sit down with your husband and try and establish what he meant when he said that to you. When he tells you, tell him what you think and what you're willing to do to satisfy his fantasy. It's all about give and take, so make sure he does something for you that he's never done before. Good luck! ;-)
2006-12-28 21:50:45 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋