im involved with a married man whom ive met for 3 mos. i am married too..he has a son and im pregnant.i have a wonderful husband still doesnt know about the two of us.his wife caught our affair and she is trying to destroy my life by threatening me with so many things.involving my career.we know we love each other so much but theres no way to escape in this real life.we're in different places right now..we know the best way to do but we just cant stop communicating each other..we dont want to continue our affair for the sake of our own family.but we cant just stop thinking about ourselves..how can we solve this problem?im really having so much pain emotionally and mentally..i want this affair to stop.
2006-12-28 19:04:45 · 21 answers · asked by haylene 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
as soon as we knew im pregnant..my lover and i consulted an OB. to know if the baby might be his or not..but my lover is 100% sure that the baby belongs to my husband.we used condoms and my husband and i are trying to conceive during that time..however, im still confused even now..my lover knew how scared i am right now..but he is trying to calm me.he is my confidant..cause we are the only one who can confide with each other..no one in my family or friends knows about our affair..thats one of the reasons why i cant escape from him..but soon the baby comes..and if the baby belongs to my husband then i can finally escape from him...
2006-12-28 20:05:45 · update #1
if you want it to end , end it.think about your husband and how he would feel if he found out?how would you feel if it were your husband cheating? you need to do some sole searching and think about what you want out of life for your family and yourself..
what about the other guys wife what extent will she go to hurt you? i really don't have a clue to what you could do to stop the affair. if neither of you want this affair get away from each other avoid each other like the pleg and remember your vows to your husband and the other guys vows to his wife.
2006-12-28 19:24:58 · answer #1 · answered by chan72 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the baby is not your husbands, I'd say your marriage is over. If it is your husbands, I get out while you can. I am surprised the guys wife hasn't gone to your husband yet? Everyone wants what they can't have, but you need to come back to reality. Sharing in each others life-day in and day out might be a whole lot different from seeing each other every now and than for just 3 months. Three months is nothing! Sounds like a sexual thing most of all. Has this guy ever cheated before? Normally people who cheat, will do it again! Your gonna need more than luck, so I hope you start thinking about your unborn baby at least.
2006-12-28 19:16:32 · answer #2 · answered by sue d 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Picture this everyone you know who has had a ugly divorce. Now picture what it will do to both your familys. His son would not be happy with you breaking up his parents. Are you pregnant by the new guy or your husband? What about your child to be or other children if you have more. Its true the kids are the ones that pay the most from divorce. You met him three months ago its still all new and exciting, but do you really know him? You said your husband is wonderful, This you know for sure about your husband. The only thing you can know for sure about this guy is he will cheat, because he already is a cheat. If your husband treats you with respect, and if you have other children no one will treat you or your kids like their real father does. If your husband finds out you may loose the best thing that ever happened to you. Your whole family. Plus if she becomes his Ex wife remember she will be in your life, like it or not FOREVER because they have a son. How happy do you think you could be with this man with both of you knowing how this relationship began. Could you trust eachother?
2006-12-28 19:21:41 · answer #3 · answered by emberly 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey I know you want to stop this affair and make everything go back to it was before but you need to tell him what if the condoms did not work and the baby belongs to your lover? Would you be able to live a lie and tell your husband it is his when it may not be? You need to come clean because even if the affair is done you will feel guilty!
2006-12-28 20:43:26 · answer #4 · answered by Danielle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This more complex than most people think. It's not as simple as just walking away. You've developed feelings for each other.
Usually, these affairs have a cycle. They're normally not meant to last, because it's a flawed relationship. However, in your situation, you can't wait for the affair to burn itself out ...
If you can convince yourself that this man is pure evil, that might help. Also, draft a "goodbye" message for him.
I think you know that you need to save your marriage ...
However, if you think the baby might be the other man's, you've got an entirely different situation on your hands.
2006-12-28 19:38:06 · answer #5 · answered by Yeah Baby! 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you want this affair to stop? then stop it. You can control yourself can't you. You were a fool to do this and now you are gonna get what you deserve when the wife tells your husband. What would you do if some one told you about the affair your husband was having That wife has every reason to try and ruin you life you ruined her marriage. turn on your brain and close your legs and you can end the affair anytime you want, if you really want to. You sound like you want to be a home wreaking tramp
2006-12-28 19:09:52 · answer #6 · answered by CindyLu 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am a single guy of 25 and it is stories like these that make me think twice about marriage. I dont wanna judge you but put yourself in your husband's or child's shoes. Imagine how that would feel.
What did you hubby do wrong, at least warn people like me so that I will know what not to do wrong when I get married coz infidelity is the one thing I cant stand in marriage
2006-12-28 19:12:15 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off who is the baby by if the man you had the affair with you have to be honest with your self and tell him the truth.tell him every thing you told me now if he hits on women then dont tell him if he dont do tell him then tell the other man to get a life because have a baby on the way,have your fruture to think about and you want to be with your husband.
2006-12-28 19:15:17 · answer #8 · answered by Tamika 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well...I can't blame you maybe you have your own reason why this thing's happened,you are only a human that sometimes commited mistakes but whatever the reason you may have it' still your fault because you are a women all the control power was on you.when you entered into this kind of situation you must think it first all the consiquences or the advantage & disadvantages.But if you do something only for pleasure. . . you are nothing!!! well. . . i might suggest control your emotion when he called or mail you dont ment it,dont mail or call him back.I think you have to change your phone or cel.no. that's all!!!
2006-12-28 19:49:02 · answer #9 · answered by chicklet 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
so where those orgasms worth it?
did you think of your husband when the other guy orgasmed inside you?
you need to sort it our. if you play with dogs, you WILL get fleas.
I hope that child is your husbands. but then research shows that women cheat more during their most fertile cycles. I bet its the flings baby.
nothing will save your marriage then. but i bet again that you will deceive your husband by saying it was his. shame lasts forever, and one day he will find out the hard way.
this is why sex is never a good enough reason to cheat. if you must find a new partner, get rid of the complications first, like husbands/wives.
2006-12-28 19:24:00 · answer #10 · answered by SAINT G 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋