I'm in love I found the man of my dreams but.........?

Question

I've been told he's gay recently and I don't know what to believe
I think of asking him but I don't want to ruin our relationship I don't want him to get offended if i ask him if he's gay. I'm scared of asking him I feel more comfortable talking with his brother but I don't want his brother getting upset either. There is a story that there was this man that would follow my man flirt and stalk him and i was told that my guy flirted back the guy came overto his house lots of times when my guy was the only one home the guy was there because my guy is supposetly sick down there. But this took place before i knew my guy but this guy has been around since to my knowledge. Should I ask my boyfriend Lennin if this story is true how do i even begin to ask should i even ask. I feel that if i never answer this question i might end up marrying a gay guy if he's lieing he lies to me and himself

It's a long distance relationship we have been a couple since summer 2005
He never called me last year he miraculosly called me this october and told me that he loves me and he misses me and he wrote me the most romantic letter and told me that he tells his friends that im the love of his life that just so sweet . I haven't met any of his friends he hasn't meet any of my mine he's the pure jealous type even if his brother hugs me he gets supper jealous. I love him with all my heart We dont pay much attention to the negativitiy people tell us. I might also mention that when I was talking about a guy in a video i said that guy is aMaricon which means gay he didn't look up he looked to the ground he was sitting next to me. Thought He didn't hear I said it loud enough so he could here me still didn't look up looking the other side and the ground were werent the only people in the room.
I feel in oreder to succeed in a relationship communication honosty and questions are key things

It's a long distance relationship we have been a couple since summer 2005
He never called me last year he miraculosly called me this october and told me that he loves me and he misses me and he wrote me the most romantic letter and told me that he tells his friends that im the love of his life that just so sweet . I haven't met any of his friends he hasn't meet any of my mine he's the pure jealous type even if his brother hugs me he gets supper jealous. I love him with all my heart We dont pay much attention to the negativitiy people tell us. I might also mention that when I was talking about a guy in a video i said that guy is aMaricon which means gay he didn't look up he looked to the ground he was sitting next to me. Thought He didn't hear I said it loud enough so he could here me still didn't look up looking the other side and the ground were werent the only people in the room.
I feel in oreder to succeed in a relationship communication honosty and questions are key things

Thank you everyone for your comments

Answer 1

:( What a horrible position. However, a relationship needs trust and honesty -- start talking to him and let him know you need to ask him some serious questions and you need [serious] answers. It's not going to be painless or easy probably, but you have to ask him straightforward and watch for his reactions or any hesitation (to know if he's searching for a coverup or something..). I wish you the best and don't forget -- a man is not worth crying over!

Answer 2

If you really love him it should not matter with you if he is a gay or not. What if, it is the other way around? You should love him whoever he is and everything about him. True love should be unconditional. In case it is true that he is a gay, as long as you both love each other, I think you can resolve any issues in the future. Instead of judging him, try to show him that you really love and accept him, whoever he is. Do not ask him or his brother about his true identity, after letting him know that you are prepared to love him unconditionally, I am sure he will tell you himself. Most of all pray for your relationship.

Answer 3

I think you should ask him cuz you could be marring a gay man. And that you don't want to do. You don't have to tell him the story you heard but you just need to sit him down when y'all are alone. tell him you need to ask him something and you're not trying to be mean but you just need to know. He might get mad but that's something you need to know. If he say yes then that would be up to you if you want to stay together. If he really loves you he would tell you the truth.

Answer 4

You have to talk to him, face to face. Ask him how he feels about gay relationships, what does he think of them. Tell him you've heard some rumors going on about him and this other guy, and you want to know the truth. However you will feel about him after he tells you, is how you will feel. Good luck.

Answer 5

what you need to find out is the compatibility long term. I would hate to see you waste 10 years of your life then come to terms with regret. I would find a guy that is willing to share you occasionally understanding that the passion of a woman is important to you. I know if my wife told me thats what she wanted I would want her to be happy and explore that avenue. With or without me

Answer 6

just take it as it comes.watch him and make your own decision.maybe you should talk to him and tell him how ya feel. get it off your chest or you might regret not saying what ya got to say.better to know now than later on wen you guys are married.

Answer 7

I think you need to talk to this guy yourself and get it straight from him--if you think he's the man of your dreams--you shouldn't haven't problems doing this.It sounds like a mess.

Answer 8

Sounds like a nightmare.

Answer 9

just ask him...
"hey (his name) can i talk to you...alone?"(he'll answer)
"ok.listen, ive been hearing a couple rumors and im not sure if their true.but please dont get mad if their not true because its not meaningful.umm...ok this is JUST a rumor...r u gay?
(he'll tell you)
now this shouldnt wreak you and ur guys relationship...actually it should bring up your self confidence and bring up your and ur guys' trust in eachother.

Answer 10

maybe hes not the man of your dreams sorry thats all the help i can give you