You know we've been together since 7 years ago but he hates to call himself as gay
2006-12-28 13:50:59 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
You've been doin' this guy for SEVEN years, even cal him your "boyfriend," and you're STILL unsure whether you and he are gay? Somehow, I don't think that's really what you want to know. What you really want to know whether or not you should burst out of this self-imposed hell of a pseudo-relationship with a guy who is so self-involved and insecure that he has trouble figuring out what side his bread is buttered on. Do yourself a favor and step out of the closet. And ask him to come with you. If he doesn't, leave him there. You'd be much better off. Sounds insensitive, I know, but c'mon. Life's too short and love's hard enough to find these days to waste it in an ambiguous relationship with someone who pretends to be just as confused.
2006-12-28 14:01:21 · answer #1 · answered by dangerouspoet 4 · 3⤊ 3⤋
Well it happens I had a boyfriend since I was 16 he always wanted sex but he said he wasn't gay. After about 7 years he realized that we were living together and he had become more of a lover in my eyes. In time I had become one in his.
Everyone goes about it at the pace they feel comfortable in.
He may never feel completely out so if your looking for a response you may have to find it in what you get.
Your just wanting more back from what you feel.
It's natural.
I hope it works out for you..it lasted me till I was 30
2006-12-29 18:27:27 · answer #2 · answered by serge4hair 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it is entirely possible that he isn't gay. Bisexuals exist, I can vouch for it. I'm bi, my gf is bi, my exbf is bi. Being in a male-male relationship, even for 7 years, doesn't make one gay. I've been in a relationship with another girlf for two years and I'm still bi. I'll always be bi. Often gays and lesbians like to pretend that we bisexuals don't exist because it complicates their worldview or leaves them out of the privledges of being part of the perfect gay couple. And it's really rude and annoying.
Now if he's claiming that he's straight, then that is a horse of a different color, and he may need some therapy stat to deal with his self loathing issues.
2006-12-29 15:22:59 · answer #3 · answered by dani_kin 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It sounds like your boyfriend doesn't want to be put into the box that society labels him. I think that it is good that he doesn't want to be labeled "gay" by society. It is human nature to give things names. But it is wrong. You are 2 humans in love. You should be thanked by society not crucified for your life style. If society looked at things a little differently they would see the same sex couples are a blessing as they not only help with the planets over population problem, they adopt babies with serious illness eg: AIDS. I say don't worry if your boyfriend doesn't want to be labeled, respect him! It sounds like he is aware of societies acceptance.
2006-12-29 01:02:38 · answer #4 · answered by Jeremiah 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Maybe its not a sexuality issue but rather a social issue. He doesn't want him self being associated with the "gay" stereotype, thats why he refuses to call himself "gay."
2006-12-28 22:02:00 · answer #5 · answered by Sui Generis 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Sounds gay to me if he's your b/f for 7 years.
2006-12-28 22:59:47 · answer #6 · answered by cripesokay2 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Haha, um... technically, yes, you two ARE gay, but it may just be that he doesn't like the word gay, or more specifically, doesn't like being called gay because of some personal sub-meaning it may have for him. I HAVE heard of this one system that specifies different meanings of the words "gay", "homosexual", "lesbian", "******", etc... (example: ****** is a word for nasty sex-crazed, slutty gay men, while homosexual is simply a man who dates and has feelings for other men; and while a "dike" would be a nasty, sex-crazed, slutty lesbian girl, a butch lesbian is a more masculine form of a lesbian). Anyway, that system gets confusing, and so I don't really bother with it, chossing to call myself whatever name I feel like (gay, fag, homo, queer, etc), but your boyfriend might follow one of those systems, and in the system he know, being called gay is actually an insult.
I hope I helped a bit. Loves,
~!*Mr. Izzy Fabulous*!~
2006-12-28 22:14:57 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Oh good grief.
You're gay. He is gay. Just accept the facts and go on with your life together.
2006-12-29 01:24:38 · answer #8 · answered by castle h 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
many ppl feel that way so the call themselfs MSM- men who have sex with other men. they don't like to b called gay. they are ofen very masculine in appearence & mannerism. many of their closest friends & family don't know their "secret" ., as they are on the "down low"
don't fret over labels for love IS love now matter what other name its called
2006-12-29 21:34:46 · answer #9 · answered by harmony 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only you can answer if you are gay or not, and same with him. I wouldn't push him to define himself. Just enjoy the relationship.
2006-12-28 22:32:10 · answer #10 · answered by sweet_leaf 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋