why does stress and arguing with my fiance make me not in the mood to have sex alot?

Question

and when i have alot on my mind it puts a damper on things like bills,money relationship..

Answer 1

Stress diverts energy (including energy that would be used to stimulate hormonal production) away from normal everyday channels into those used for conflict-resolution/defense.

Stress, essentially, pushes people into recovery mode, while sex is usually only possible when one is recovered and able to devote excess energy to its pursuit. Also, arguing with the person whom you would be spending your sexual energy on is like trying to get close to someone you can't stand. Arguing makes us pull away from a person while sexuality intends to draw us closer. You can't do both at the same time. This is usually why, when couples fight, they make up so intensely afterwards: since they are no longer pulling away from each other, the gap between them makes them that much more aware of their intimacy, which makes them reconnect even stronger to better strengthen the bond.

Again, stress diverts energy away from our ability to handle multiple energy-intensive activities. Imagine trying to juggle three balls, labeled bills/money, relationship, and family. Now try to juggle them while balancing a stress ball on the tip of your nose. As each ball is added, the less energy/concentration you have to devote to it's maintenence. The concentration you use to balance the stress ball takes away from the energy/concentration you could be using to juggle the other three; hence, you usually dont' juggle them so well, and maybe one or two (or even all three) get dropped.

Answer 2

it is very common for both men and women to have this problem.
talk it out and Im sure your libito will return