How do I tell a friend to quit complaining?

Question

I have this friend that I used to work with. I quit because I couldn't take the bs of the job anymore. It's been almost a year since I quit and my friend calls me everyday and constantly complains about the people at work. I quit cause I was tired of it, I don't like hearing about it everyday. Plus she is 6 years younger than me and has no husband or kids to worry about. I have a husband serving in Iraq and two small kids at home. The things she complains about are nothing compaired to what I am going through. How do I kindly get her to stop doing this everyday. She is my friend so I want to be here for her and listen when she needs me but this crap is just childish. I have enough stress!

Answer 1

She is probably complaining to you and telling you all of her problems and then forgets to ask you about yours. My mom does this crap to me all the time. There is no easy way of doing it. You should just talk to her and tell her that you quit the job because you didn't want to think about it and by her talking about it just upsets you. Tell her that you want to talk about things but just not those things. I'm sure that if you talk to her in a calm voice of reason then she will understand. You also have to understand that she is 6 years younger and is probably mainly focused on herself right now. If you make her see that you have problems too then maybe she'll come around and start listening to you complain a little lol. She also needs to understand that she should be thankful for all the things that go right in her life instead of focusing on all the bad things because it could always be so much worse. Good luck.

Answer 2

maybe she complains because she just wants someone to confide in. she knows that you are the only one that will listen and understand her. maybe you can just talk to her and tell her that her complaining is getting on your nerves. tell her that everyone has to go through something when they are at work and that working for what you want and things that you need isnt always gonna be easy and a piece of cake. just be honest with her. if she is really your friend then she will understand and wont ask questions. good luck.

Answer 3

Be honest with her. Tell her you quit and what goes on at work isn't any of your business anymore. Tell her what you're feeling. Tell her exactly what you wrote here. She may understand. Sooner or later it will get to her and she'll stop. but be kind in doing so. She may complain more..lol. hope this works out for you.

Answer 4

well, what i would do is just tell her that u dont want to hear it. be to the point about it. it may hurt her feelings but if it is stressing u out then u need to stop it. tell her u have too many other things going on in life to have to listen to her whining.

Answer 5

Write her a letter or a card. No E-mail, no phone calls, no IM's. Handwrite a simple little note to her, and explain how you feel. If she sees that you took the time to write something, then she'll (hopefully) realize you really mean it.

Answer 6

tell i not trying 2 b rude but i have my own problems if u don't want 2 go dat way don't answer her calls or try 2 change the subject wen she starts talking/gossiping about ppl

Answer 7

You need to just let her go. Like you said, you've got a life and that's what you need to be focusing on. Stop wasting your time with her.

Answer 8

Don't answer the phone, but if you do answer the phone, keep interupting by saying someone is at the door, or that your child needs you. or whatever it takes to stop the calls.

Answer 9

Tell her if you were in her shoes that you would quit, then remind her you did just that.

Answer 10

"NIP-IT-IN-THE-BUD"!
And I don't mean "BUDWEISER"! All you have to do is tell her to "SHUT THE HELL UP"! "CHANGE THE SUBJECT"! "SING A DIFFERENT NOTE"! "PLAY A DIFFERENT TUNE"! Or just wear ear plug's next time she comes over and just nod your head! End of subject!!!!!!