My husband acts like a teenager or a college kid. Every time his single friend with no job comes over he runs off with him to the bar! They are always out late and my husband acts like I am so unfair because it is close to home!? He even said to me that if this will cause a divorce he does not care. I think it is immature for him to put his friend first and not his wife and kids!
2006-12-28 11:13:30 · 12 answers · asked by Samantha 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
There are several problems here that i can see. You need to tell your husband that unless he wants to move in with his single friend with no job he needs to get his **** together. A man that is married and has two kids shouldn't be hanging out with a single guy at the bar. And if he told you that he doesn't care if you divorce him over this then i think that he has made it pretty clear what means more to him. You might be hurt at first but after awhile you will be glad that you rid yourself of this jerk who doesn't deserve to have a family and I don't think he wants it anyway.There are alot of real men out there that would love to have a good wife.
2006-12-28 11:22:02 · answer #1 · answered by *queenfairy1*Antioch California 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think every man needs time every now and then where he can do what he wants without the entanglement of wife and children.
However, if this is something he does more than a few times a month I would at the very least demand equal time for myself to go out with the ladies while he watches the kids. That should let him know what it feels like!
You do need to talk about this and work out a satisfactory arrangement that is fair to everyone.
If he doesn't want to do that, you may have to call his bluff on the divorce threat.
2006-12-28 19:20:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, i know that you cant have him tied up at the house all the time either...you have to give your husband the space he needs, or he wont be around much longer anyhow. Im not at all trying to sound harsh, but i think that if he is acting immature and everything, then maybe its because he has been keeping it all bottled up inside because he has a family to care for. Maybe he is just acting like he is having a good time going out. I mean, dont you like to go out and get away every now and then?? Dont react so harshly...he isnt ditching his wife, he is just having some free time.
2006-12-28 19:17:44 · answer #3 · answered by Stephanie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I would not appreciate being treated that way. And that apparently he doesn't care because he said that he doesn't care if this causes a divorce. :( That's too bad. I would tell him that you both need to sit down and talk and respect each others feelings. Tell him every once in awhile is okay, but doing it often is affecting you and your marriage. If he doesn't care, then I think you have your answer. Sorry. Just keep this in mind..... Do you want to live your life like this? And if you do have kids, what sort of role model/example is he being?
2006-12-28 19:19:17 · answer #4 · answered by ddcalny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like hubby's got different priorities than you. Is he serious when he says that he would choose hanging out in a bar over keeping his family if forced to choose? Unreal. Please don't have any more kids with this guy. If the roles were reversed, would he be okay with that? No, its not fair, but its downright scary, really. He does sound immature like you said. Sorry. I wish you the best.
2006-12-28 19:19:32 · answer #5 · answered by whereRyou? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
File for divorce and see if he really means that. If he is so inconsiderate of your feelings he's a jerk. If he wants so much to be single, consider letting him be happy that way. I'll bet he'll start caring when it comes down to it. It's sad that he won't listen to your concerns. His excuse is ridiculous. It doesn't matter how close to home he is. He could easily be seeing someone else.
2006-12-28 19:54:05 · answer #6 · answered by pinniethewooh 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This isn't going to make you feel better but it is the truth. This is the man you married. You cant force someone to spend time with you and arguing with him is only going to make the wedge in your relationship wider. He has to make the choice to put you guys first. You cant make it for him. It has to be important to him. We make time for the things in life that are important. I am not saying that he is being nice on the contrary I think his behavior is horrid but you married him. I really douth he has changed all that much since you said i do, its just now his behavior is getting louder so to speak. I am sorry your going through this I hope things get better. Sorry life is rarely fair, I wish it were.
Kourtnie D
2006-12-28 20:03:32 · answer #7 · answered by Kourtnie D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are right. He doesn't care if it causes divorce, I'd file now and make sure I got everything. see how fast he'd care then. When it comes to things like this I can be pretty cold.
2006-12-28 19:20:04 · answer #8 · answered by Pandora 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Totally unfair. Make him go to counseling so that a professional can tell him he's an idiot (men are more likely to believe it then) and if he won't go, kick him out. It will never improve.
2006-12-28 19:17:08 · answer #9 · answered by angelbaby109_83 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he like playing the field, put the skids under him..DO you want someone who is running around like that...IF he doesn't care if it comes to divorce, it may...you have to choose...
2006-12-28 19:16:16 · answer #10 · answered by Brenda Soooooooooooooooooooooooo 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋