sorry its long
my mum quit work in the 80's to bring me and my lil brother up. my dad earned enough so this was cool. we moved to a different town in the early 90's when i was 7 coz my dad got promoted.
after this i cant ever remember my dad taking my mum out at night by themselves. they never got a babysitter or family to look after me n my bro.
they never had friends over for drinks or meals.
my mum didnt have to work so she hasnt made any friends round here.
my mum and dad got divorced 5 years ago. i moved out 2 years ago. now my bro works and he wants to move out and in with his girlfriend.
my dad is now engaged to someone else.
my mum however doesnt have any friends and hasnt met anyone new. she wants to but since my dad never took her out she never met new people or made friends. she comes across shy and unconfident and doesnt get jobs she applies for.
i really want to help her overcome this. she is lonely but seems scared to go out there.
what could i do?
2006-12-28 08:31:46 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
it is something she has to overcome by herself, the only way she will overcome shyness is by going out and meet people despite her fear. I highly recommend her to read the books by Claire Weeks or listen to her tapes. Also the books by Lucinda Bassett.
Your mom doesnt have much confidence and social skills because she hasnt exposed herself much to that, it will take a lot of courage and perseverance.
2006-12-28 08:38:47 · answer #1 · answered by Alejandra 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe internet dating would be good for your mum.
She could write to a prospective suited and they could try and get to know one another a little before they actually arranged a meeting.
As they would have learned quite a lot about each other through writing,it might break the ice a little.
Not ideal maybe, but just a thought.
2006-12-28 19:38:50 · answer #2 · answered by animalwatch 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Might be helpful to see if she would do some volunteer work maybe a day a week, just to get her out there and build her confidence. She'll meet people, have something positive to talk about and it could be a springboard into working.
Your council website may well be able to advise.
2006-12-28 08:42:37 · answer #3 · answered by John S 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
take her on a holiday
japan is good if you do go try a Ryokan a kind of guest house, they have communial dining,bathing and everyone has to wear a type of kimono for the evening meal.
The Japanese are very polite.
The second night go bathing naked they do not bat an eyelid and that gives you confidence to meet people naked, after that you will never be shy.
It's only this country which has a weird attitude creating a lack of self belief, and a feeling that there is something wrong with ourselves, and there truly is not!
2006-12-28 08:42:10 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
That is so considerate of you...you must be a great daughter!! (like mine). I don't know what you can do, she has to do it for herself..Unless you know someone who knows someone who has a job for her, or people she can have a relationship with. She sounds a lot like me. I'm not shy, but don't have any friends where I live, I am fortunate that my daughter needs me still ( age 27) so she, my granddaughter and I live together. It works out great. Find groups in your area, churches, etc. she will be alright!
2006-12-28 08:42:49 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shyness can often be perceived as being cold or aloof. I would suggest joining a club where the focus is not on meeting people but on an activity that she enjoys.
2006-12-28 22:45:57 · answer #6 · answered by Jon 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to keep fit or yoga together.
Both join up for French classes, or creative writing or something else she might enjoy.
Find a group associated with something she enjoys doing and go along with her.
2007-01-01 08:29:54 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
take her to your local for a quiet drink now and again that should pick her up a bit, meet someone new and make her a bit more confident, instead of applying for a job, she could be her own boss and clean a few houses for money in the hand,she could advertise herself.
2006-12-28 08:38:21 · answer #8 · answered by blank 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
the clarification you warfare to speak is given which you have not got anybody to speak to different than your loved ones attempt in simple terms finding one in each and every of your pals and have a entire bitching communication to them that ususally facilitates women and if that dont artwork ask them to establish an afternoon the place you and them pass out and get them to convey distinctive there friends and meet all there friends it facilitates unquestionably i used to clam up each and every time i talked to all and sundry and that i could no longer communicate to women maximum of all its in simple terms an journey issue! as i replaced into advised as quickly as "self assurance comes with journey!" this is definately actual! wish this facilitates!
2016-10-06 03:24:48 · answer #9 · answered by huenke 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give her diamonds as a present
2006-12-28 08:41:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋