If Abortion Is a Women's Choice, Why Isn't Child Support a Man's Choice?

Question

Personally I think I man should be held accountable for every mistake he makes in regard to an innocent life.

But there seems to be a double standard in the law. Why is a man held responsible for an innoncent life that he created when a women isn't?

Can a man have an abortion from giving financial aid if he decides he didn't want the child in the first place? Why should a man be forced to care for a woman and child he doesn't want? Clearly this is something that only a man can decide for himself and only men can understand.

Aren't these all the exact same arguments pro-choicers give for abortion rights?

Once again. If you get pregnant (or cause a woman to get pregnant) you should have to live with the concequences. It's about personal responsibility. I know you hated the word when you were a kid but its time to grow up now.

Answer 1

Could someone please explain to me why it is that men feel the need to complain endlessly about the very few instances in this world where a woman actually holds the power? Jesus Christ, thousands of years of patriarchy, higher wages, and a much smaller chance of being raped, abused by a domestic partner, etc...I guess that wasn't enough for you? you still feel you've got a raw deal? You would like a say in our reproductive choices as well? Well, tell you what, when you start having to deal with the thought of carrying a life within your own body and giving birth, you can have a bigger say.

And by the way, you're not completely without any control here. That worried about it? Keep it your pants. We ALL have to deal with consequences when it comes to sex. Some of us play a bigger role when it comes to reproduction. It would stand to reason that we have a bigger say.

Answer 2

Having gone through an unwanted abortion, I know exactly how you feel. My EX killed our child so it wouldn't interfere with her graduate school. Selfish, huh? There was nothing I could do, it was her body and therefore her choice. I have come to terms with the fact that men have no rights when it comes to an abortion.

That got me to thinking about the whole child support thing, just as you have. I asked this same question a few months ago, here are the answers I received: http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=At9o7E18IpL7K1M8TWX9amXsy6IX?qid=20060612215519AAfYc0r
The best answer has links to some great articles about men's rights. It is a growing movement.

I will always take care of any child I help to make, but they need a fighting chance to live. There needs to be a kind of surrogate system put into place; where another woman carries the child to birth so the real mother can forget about it and live her life as she chooses. Of course, she would have no rights to ever see the child she ABORTED from her life.

Answer 3

Actually, the State of Georgia has been known to grant custody to the father, with the mother owing child support. That system works both ways. And as to abortion... If the two weren't willing to be a family, what the heck were they doing trying to make one??? More specifically, if they wanted sex, that's fine, I suppose, but why? Oh, WHY did they decide to have sex without birth control? And, if it's one of those "had the protection, but things happen" deals, then they should both have thought about the consequences before hand. Youth does not mean irresponsible. I have seen 16 yr olds be more responsible than 42 yr olds.

Answer 4

I am with the other women on this who have responded with the following: this is an absolutely ridiculous comparison. First of all, the question posed is an oxymoron in itself. You are asking why a woman has the right to decide to terminate a pregnancy, but then turn around and ask why a man is made to be responsible for a life he didn't want.........seems to me that this just re-enforces my idea that men want to have their cake and eat it too. The man isn't "forced" to care for the woman. The man is legally obligated to take care of his child though. I would say that if you weren't ready for a child, maybe you shouldn't be sticking your penis where it doesn't belong. If you are man enough to come inside her, then you should be man enough to take care of what comes out.

Answer 5

Well for one - a man is not forced to care for a woman "he didn't want" - he is legally and morally obligated to support his child.

Any time you take tab A and stick it in slot B you are playing baby Russian Roulette unless you are surgically or medically rendered sterile.

Yes women have option of abortion, where as men do not. Bummer - but considering that the baby in question is residing in the mother's body - she can pull rank on this one.

If a man (or a woman) was to avoid being forced into legal/moral obligations then there are clear and effective ways to prevent the problem....#1 Abstinence #2 Surgical Sterilization #3 Toys and hands.
If a person so chooses to engage in sex - then they do it knowing fully well that a child may result. Just like a scratch off lottery ticket - one time you might not get anything, the next time might be a million, but you can't win if you don't play!

Answer 6

They shouldnt be forced to pay child support.
Its ridiculous how a woman can trick a man into getting her pregnant and have a child simply so she can collect a check for the next 18 years.

Answer 7

Well, Im sure that someone would eventually say that because, while an abortion effectively removes the obligation, the same cannot be said of a living child who's simply ignored by the father. That life is a fact and that fact doesn't change because it's ignored.

That's one argument.

However, I'm of the belief that it's no more moral to terminate a life in the womb than it would be for a man to kill his child and the mother of his child... which would also effectively remove his obligation.

Answer 8

Actually, if you want to compare, a man should be responsible to RAISE the child, not just walk away and pay child support. If a man is a single parent, he is ALSO entitled to child supoport, it isn't just men who pay. So you have hit the nail on the head about the controversy...a man can walk away, a woman cannot. And a woman not only subjects herself to child support, but also the physical dangers of carrying a pregnancy. If you want to TRY and compare the 2, compare apples to apples. And what makes you think that men ACTUALLy pay their child suport? Many find out when they try and collect social security, that they aren't able to on account of back child support.

And BTW, no woman who has had an abortion will tell you that she 'enjoyed it', or that she is devoid of responsibillity. There is plenty of fallout, both physical and mental, from having to make that tough decision, one men can't ever understand or relate to. Stick to what you know, son...and stay out of women's issues.

I really hope the poster below me doesn't think that aborting a 5 week fetus is the same as a man killing a woman and a child...unless that woman and child are parasitic twins sharing his body...

Answer 9

they are both a double standard. in ohio(maybe more states) the original law was a father was physically and financially responsible for the child. meaning he got custody,but no support. women fought for the physical responsibilty,but not the full financial responsibility. the term deadbeat dad is political propaganda. the government is involved in child supprot for a reason,they make money off of it,not for the benefit of the child.

Answer 10

I am not so sure that the 2 should be compared. It is a woman's choice to give birth....or not. The father of this fetus does not have to grow and give birth to this baby, as it is not in his body. But if the pregnancy is carried out, yes he should be financially responsible for the well being of his child or children. I understand your argument, but the same law applies to a woman, if she gives birth, and decides to walk away from this child, or custody is granted to the father, she would have to pay child support as well. This is a sad state of our culture when parents argue about being responsible for their children. It is not only about money, it is about love as well, and if you love your child, you should want to make sure this child has what he or she needs...2 parents. If men do not want this responsibility, then take precautions to prevent the situation (or mistake as you stated)...keep it zipped up, or wear a condom, even if the woman claims she is protected. I do not speak from experiance, I have raised 3 children, and have never collected 1 dime of support...it's just my take on the issue.