Does anyone know how i can gain control over my little brothers and sisters?

Question

They are below the age of 14 and dey are so wild. i try my best to control and quiet them down but nothing seems 2 work.

Answer 1

find something nice and quiet they can do, make up a new game, or do something fun with them like make a talent show, kids love that and they will have fun, have some of them be the judge, you can watch and have fun and they can have fun to, after that sit them down for a nice movie something they all can agree on ((yes i know that may be hard)) make popcorn and you can go do what ever it is you have to do.

Answer 2

I'm the eldest of 3 and I too tried to take control over my 2 little brother when we were still living in the same home. Now that 10 years have passed I understood that my brothers didn't accept my authority probably because I took it for granted that they had to obey me and I was probably to much authoritarian. Today, if I had to do it again, I would try to show them more respect; they might have shown more consideration to what I told them if I hadn't constantly tried to overpower them.

Answer 3

Speaking to an older child:
you have understand them very very well
you have to be stronger than them
you have to be faster than them
you have to be smarter than them

and thats just the basics, it wont get you what you want, it just gives you a fighting chance.

Now, you need to understand their motives, and incentives.
You need to truly serve them, not being silly, but genuinely seeing to it that their feelings are understood and considered.
You need to earn their respect. They are immature, and that means they arent capable of knowing who they should or shouldnt respect. Their natural inclination is to give it to the people who are "cool" but more likely to get them into trouble, and less likely to people who are "booring" but are really motivated to serve their best interests.

Bottom line: you cant control anyone, but putting everything you have into understanding, then being in a place to act on it can sometimes give you a little bit of influence.

In ten years they are not going to remember who they are now. Right now, as politically incorrect as it is to say it, they are insane. Their brains are transforming, their emotions, their hormones, and our culture really is centered around making things complex and confusing for kids that age. They are insane and they dont know it.. they think they are sane and that the world has gone insane. They are only half of the persons they used to be and they are halfway the persons that they are becoming, and you dont know both of those people.

If you do things now that leave emotional marks when they turn 22-24 for the boys and 20-22 for the girls, and their brains and bodies return to sanity, they wont be able to clearly remember why they have the emotional marks, but they will trust them implicitly. If you make bad blood now, it can last a lifetime, even after the kids return to being sane.

My suggestion: prayer, and lots of it. You cant keep your husband from cheating, or becoming an alcoholic if he puts his heart into it. How many diets have you been on? How many new-years resolutions do you break a year? If you cant change the adults who arent insane, who are closest to you, and you cant even change yourself, what gives you the delusion that you can change someone else? The only one who can change someone else is God, and sometimes he actually does it. He does it in His own sweet time, but be willing to be patient, and loving, and praying for 5 or 10 years. Ive seen lots of good come from that.

Bribery is the worst answer. It will actually make them hate and disrespect you more. If you bribe a kid to eat his spinach by giving him ice cream when he is done, he will eat. But all the time he is eating spinach he is rehearsing how bad it is, and how good ice cream is. All the time she is eating the ice cream she is rehearsing how good it is and how bad the spinach was. Over time they cement their opinions much stronger. Im a sunday school teacher in my church. I decided to try a "rewards" system where performance was rewarded well. Before I tried it only about 30% of the kids were doing their homework for class. While it was going about 95% of the kids did it. When it was done the kids were much more self-absorbed, self-focussed, and only about 15% were doing the same homework. This wasnt a one month thing, this whole process involved about 50 kids over a period of 2 years. There is a LOT of data there backing me up. Bribery is effective in the short term, and sinks you in the long term. If you are looking at working with them more than a month, dont do bribery.

Beating and intimidation are short term tactics, as is blackmail. They nearly always backfire. The only way that physical discipline works is if it is established by a parent, that an understanding of what the crime was, and what the punishment for it was, had been solidly established ahead of time, and if it is administered by a parent. In their mind they are your equal, and want to be your better. How would you take beating and intimidation tactics from them? They dont have the right to do it, you would get mad, and you would get even. If they were trying to force you to do something, you might stupidly do it once, but when the beating came a second time, you would fight back with all you have. They will get mad, hate you, and fight back with all they have. Remember, you must must must act from a true understanding, and not just a want.

I like what Belle said, and I think its a key. Human beings are creatures of Joy. We run to it like a moth to a flame. If you want to connect, the place to do it is joy.

Answer 4

Bribe them! Or get their interest with a game or a scavenger hunt. They are probably bored since school's out and just want something to do. Can you have a craft time, just something simple to make that will get them sat down and doing something busy with their hands. How about having a schedule and having movie time, craft time, game time. Even exercise time to get them tired, then maybe color time. Some organization will give them something to look forward to.

Answer 5

i sometime find something bad about thim and tell them this''if you dont do what i say i will tell on you'' or u can just get something for them and they must do what u say 2 get the gift but they will olny do that if the gift is good or u do them a favor and they do something for u.

Answer 6

Put them in the closet!! So they can write a song 'Trapped in the Closet!!!'

Answer 7

maybe they just need to be spanked and then they will relieze who is the boss and do what is told when told.

Answer 8

beat them up then they'll be scarred of you.