Why do they hold marriage as the goal they base sucess or failure in life around? What is wrong with living a happy independent life while having friends and dating?
I'm just wondering as I see so many people asking why they can't find a guy/girl to marry. If it's a family you seek, you still do not need to be married to accomplish that.
2006-12-28 03:54:26 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Also, a study released this year showed for the first time, there are more unmarried households in the US than married.
2006-12-28 04:00:43 · update #1
. People tend to get lonely. When your just dating you might have a date on valentines day or x-mass or new years etc..And friends sometimes have there own lives too. Being single at the end of the day your by yourself. And there's nothing wrong with that. I know I lived that life for 6yrs. I dating alot. Had friends. I had a full cycle life. But sometimes at night you wish you had that somebody there. Don't get me wrong I also loved being by myself too.And as a person gets older you want to share your life with someone.If your not ready for marriage, then stay were you are. Marriage is a true comment. Its no longer just your life. It means that you commented to think in do for a other person first before you. And a lot of people don't relies that.There a lot to being married. Go out in buy ten stupid things men do to mess up their lives by Dr. Laura C. Schlessinger
2006-12-28 04:23:47 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would say that society seems to put so much pressure on living the American Dream. You go to College, Meet a spouse, have 2.3 kids, have a good job and house, have a little dog, and live happily ever after. Although that's not normal life these days, people still crave companionship. We were created as social beings. People are unhappy when they can't find what THEY are looking for.
Although for years I thought of myself always being single and into my career. I never saw myself settling down, I still craved that at times. Finally after a bad relationship that I resolved I felt truly happy being single. That is when I met my husband.
2006-12-28 05:22:35 · answer #2 · answered by steffiegirl815 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is a book by Gary Smalley called the DNA of Relationships that is incredible. In it he explains that we are all "hard wired" for relationships and seek out relationships to complete the circuitry so to speak. It makes me think about Tom Hanks character in the movie where he is stranded on a deserted island and he creates the relationship with Wilson. We want to have people in our lives that validate us and give us self-worth. And ultimately have that special someone that will do both of those and more in a secure, trusting, exclusive relationship. Sometimes that can happen without marriage but usually being married adds a depth of security that most of us desire.
2006-12-28 04:12:11 · answer #3 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The folks you are talking about have never BEEN MARRIED.
I think a lot of people get married because they want to be married, but they forget that the most important part is to marry the right person. The difference is marriage as a social/economic unit or marriage as a sacred union between two people who are faithful and devoted to each other's well-being.
2006-12-28 04:14:26 · answer #4 · answered by my sign 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people get extremely lonely. And being alone for some people is really heard. Either they never learned to enjoy being with just themselves, or they were raised to BELIEVE that true happiness comes from getting married and having a family.
Its hard sometimes when people have not been trained to think outside the box.
2006-12-28 05:35:37 · answer #5 · answered by TracyBee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think society puts so much pressure on us to feel as though somehow we're not "complete" unless we're married... which, of course, is ridiculous.
You find that pressure everywhere: friends, family, books, movies, television, etc, etc, etc.
Personally, I think there's absolutely everything right with living a happy life-- in whatever form that takes for you.
As far as children: you're right, of course, you don't need to be married to accomplish that.... but, then again, with kids, it's not about "you" anymore... it's about "them." First and foremost.
From your other questions, it looks like you might be going through some personal changes. All the best to you.
And good luck!
2006-12-28 04:06:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Unless you want to have children that are messed up, then you would naturally want to be married in order to have a family.
Why would you bring children into this world without having a mother to relate to the daughter and a father to relate to the son. Of course being in the home isn't an automatic 'father', and similarly, just because a 'father' doesn't love the mother doesn't mean he wont love the child.
But WHY pick someone who doesn't want to be with your child 24/7? Thus the despair over finding a spouse.
You want someone who will love you enough to commit to the relationship (the love part) to committ to the kids (to being there and being a F/T parent) and to the business (yes, marriage IS a business).
2006-12-28 03:59:57 · answer #7 · answered by FavoredbyU 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The fact remains that people pair up. The world is geared that way. There is a biological need to have children and to pair up, in addition to the religious concept of marriage to produce children.
People also feel rejected and unloved if they cannot find a mate - like maybe there's something wrong with them.
There's also the fact that people crave security and marriage is supposed to provide emotional security, if not physical, financial and sexual security.
2006-12-28 05:37:21 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
no person gets married to break up. To experience unhappy is trouble-free. To cry is widely used and regardless once you have self assurance such as you're getting the extra helpful end of the deal it relatively is a existence changing party. And sure ive long gone with the aid of ability of the samething and had all the equivalent thoughts. in spite of the undeniable fact that the previous announcing is going time heals all wounds and for probable the main section it is actual.
2016-11-24 20:11:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Like you, I don't understand either. I guess the grass always looks greener. After being married to an abusive man, I don't choose to go there again. I like my single life. I come and go as I choose, I spend my own money (that I'm not handing over to him), my life is peaceful, I don't have to worry about whether I'll come home to a grouchy, hateful man.
There ... I think I've said it all ...
2006-12-28 04:53:21 · answer #10 · answered by Sally 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋