Ive been married now for 12 years with 2 wonderful kids and a lump of a wife, i still keep myself fit, clean, tidy, and presentable but the missus is letting herself go.Not only has she put on 70 pounds in the last 4 years her filthy habits are getting worse, take christmas day for example she had a triple helping of sprouts for the simple reason she knew by bed time they would be rumbling in her belly and she would have some massive farts, well the dirty cow done the dirty and dutch ovened me "it was foul" she laughed it off as though it was a joke, but i didnt laugh i'm seriously thinking of leaving her, its not just this she has some rotten habits and she is a mess, the kids are embarrassed and we havent made love since last may.
2006-12-28 03:22:44 · 34 answers · asked by qcumber man 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
oink oink ditch her take the kids and go let the kids see her though or talk talk is good
2006-12-28 03:33:53 · answer #1 · answered by Queen of Boredom 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She probably behaves like this as she has formed low self esteem and opinion or herself, esecially if you call her a pig to her face. Rather than trying to deal with it, she lets herself go and plays the fool. She probably thinks to herself that even if she made the effort, it would not be worth it because you still wouldn't fancy her. I think you should be kind and tell her how you miss how she was when you were younger and try to give her some support in losing weight. Take her to the gym with you and work together on getting her back to how she should be. My ex used to criticise me and sneer at me how fat i was and it is just soul destroying really. If she thinks you are seriously behind her she will probably make the effort. Compliment her when you see an improvement and encourage her. Get the kids on board too, encouraging her. When you are single you realise how valuable a marriage is. You may be lucky and meet another person to be happy with, but your kids may not be that impressed and you may not meet someone, leaving you on your own and lonely. So think very carefully before you hit the road and enter the world of women who play games with your mind and give you an STD!
2006-12-28 03:39:02 · answer #2 · answered by bluegizmored 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You married for better or worse. She obviously has issues that need to be addressed. And have you always been this supportive? You are not talking to her. Talk to her in a kind way. If you do not love her leave. The last thing you should be doing is calling her names. You are disrespecting her. And she is disrespecting herself and all involved! Is she depressed? Figure it out and work with her. Closely. Get counseling for both if need be. You obviously were attracted to a beautiful woman before. What happened? Support the kids mom for them. Words you say are spiteful and hurt them am sure. As hurts her too. It doesn't look well on you either!. You are better than this. Happy new Year.
2006-12-28 03:32:20 · answer #3 · answered by bountyhunter101 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My advise would be to go to couples counseling... that is if u care at all. It sounds like u've waited too long.
But if u did go to couples counseling, I bet u would learn a thing or two about ur wife, and y she has let herself turn out the way she has. And since it IS counseling, u would be able to talk, and let out ur feelings about everything that has been going on. U could even bring the kids in, and go to family counseling. She may have NO idea that what she's doing is hurting u all so much.
If u love ur wife at all, u would try ur hardest to work through ur difficult times. If u loved ur wife at all, u would be very angry with urself if u left her, then found out later how well she's doing, and that she's turned back into the woman u fell in love with.
Well, I hope everything works out.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
2006-12-28 03:53:25 · answer #4 · answered by silvr_chyk_serah 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My question to you is do u love her?Am sorry that she laughs at u when your trying to tell her,and that she just brush's it off. It sounds like she believes that u will never leave her. I known men to leave there wives over this. Before you make that move you need to let her listen to the Dr. Laura C. Schlessinger talk radio show on 640am 12noon-3pm Mon-Fri Southern CA time. and she gots a few good books out. Your wife really needs to read the proper care and feeding of husbands and ten stupid things couples do to mess up their relationships and stupid things parents do to mess up their kids. Dr. Laura really gets on women that are just like your wife. Sometimes a person needs to hear it from someone from the outside. So again my question to u is do u love her? If u answer yes, then please look into the Dr. Laura show and get her books. Just remember things don't happen overnight. This is something that has to work its course. Your wife is going to need that time and help. Your wife needs to change her ways if she wants to keep you, her husband.God be with u and bless your marriage.
2006-12-28 03:42:57 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you ever think that she may be depressed or that your lack of attention could be part of the reason she has let herself go? How about showing her a little attention. Do you really think it's just all HER fault? Think about your "pigginess" as well... what odd habits do YOU have? If you don't want to work on your relationship, get out. YOU would not be worth the effort if you are not willing to work on things with her.
2006-12-29 01:07:20 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
forget the bad habits do you still love your wife? if so cook her a nice romantic meal buy her a new sexy dress and sit and have a heart to heart. she may just be tryin to get you to notice her to see shes not happy. after i had my 2 boys i lost my sence of self i didn't feel sexy or have any interest in sex i was to lost in bein a mum and i didn't have the time i needed to find myself again and all my husband could do was ignore me or complain i'm now getting a divorse and finding myself again.my point is your wifes not happy shes lost and maybe she needs your help to find herself. tell her you love her and you and the kids are worried about her
2006-12-28 06:34:16 · answer #7 · answered by nat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should leave her. Not because she is a "PIG" but because she is obviously too depressed living with you to care what she looks like and you obviously have no respect for her.
The kids will definately feel the tension in the house and it will be doing them no favours at all.
I hope you never treat anyone as badly as you do her and vice versa.
2006-12-28 03:47:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Somehow I doubt you are catch that you are portaying yourself as. Anyway, I would suggest talking calmly to your wife without insulting her and possibly suggest doing some workouts together. Maybe get some couples therapy as well. Perhaps a few ettiqette classes for the 2 of you.
2006-12-28 03:28:28 · answer #9 · answered by Reisnoh 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
How rude. You should be discussing this with your wife. You mention she's put on 70lbs - childbirth can do this to women, as can being in a miserable marriage with a shallow twit. You obviously don't love her (why else would you refer to her as "pig", "lump" and "cow" ?) I suggest you leave her - do her a favour, and give her a chance to find someone who has an ounce of respect - you obviously do NOT.
2006-12-28 03:30:38 · answer #10 · answered by Bondgirl 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You seriously need to sit down and talk to her! A 12 year long marriage is worth saving especially because it would devistate the kids! Try marriage counseling. If she loves you then she will change to be with you.
2006-12-28 03:29:16 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋