Can we still be friends?

Question

My boyfriend broke up with me on tuesday, we had been together for 8 months. I completely understand his decision, as things were becoming difficult, we couldn't be together when we needed or wanted too as we lived to far apart (different countries)...we both still have very strong feelings for eachother and are both very upset by the decision, but we also know that it is for the best as it was too difficult being apart but being together, (no matter how much we saw eachother we knew we would have to seperate and that would be hard on us both). We could talk about anything, laugh at eachothers silly habits and jokes, and he would constantly sing to me and tell me how much he liked me and felt me inside, his respect for me was also amazing. Bless i'll miss him. But i know we couldn't be friends yet as our feelings are still strong it just wouldn't work, but once we've had a break would it be possible or would the feelings come back?

Answer 1

Nope, move along. Why would you want to torture yourself like that anyhow?

Answer 2

I don't know about you two, I mean, every couple is different. I've had break-ups where 'still being friends' meant never seeing that person again... but I also had break ups where it's meant what it said... you do need distance, and you need discipline, because the desire to fall back into a relationship together can be strong... and you can have fun for a while then, but it's pretty sure another break-up isn't far away...

Let the smoke clear, and see what happens- you can try at being friends, and it can work, but if he's not interested, then it's going nowhere... if he does want to be your friend and you want to be his, then sure, go ahead, why lose touch with someone who means a lot to you? The friendship that follows may be one of the strongest you ever have in your life!

Answer 3

Give yourself some time to mourn and then move on. If need be, sometimes counselling helps. A breakup of a relationship is not unlike a death in the family if it has been a long time relationship. If you are feeling grief and possibly guilt from the breakup, then counselling will help you to realize that it was not something either of you did wrong. It just wasn't meant to be.

It is also good to remember that somewhere out there is someone who will cherish you and love you both as you deserve to receive.

Answer 4

me and my boyfriend were together for 29 months, we loved each other very much. On the 29th anniversary of us getting together he proposed to me, and i said yes. 6 days into the engagement, we had planned a quiet romantic dinner in for us two. So i went round his and walked on him having sex with another man, this devistated me, and obviously we split up. Months after we agreed that we should try being friends still, and it was cool to begin with, then he started having loads of different partners, and it broke my heart everytime, the guy that i loved was already over me and havoing fun with someone else. So i would personally say don't remain his friend as no body deserves getting hurt, but at the end of th day you have all these people giving you their opinion, but you are the only one who can answer this question for you, follow what you heart says and not your head. I wish you all the luck in the world.
Hope i have helped.

Answer 5

Im friends with all of my X's but 2. I see most of them on a regular basis and we chat often. It took time with all of them to become friends, but I wouldnt ever trade their friendship for another relationship. I always think that at some point during or before the relationship, we were best friends.... So why would we end that just because we arent together anymore? There was something I liked about them... so why cant we be friends still. PLUS.... I always ALWAYS remember that there was a reason we broke up, and not to repeat those mistakes. Good luck to you!

Answer 6

It's possible, but you'll always miss the relationship the way it was and constantly compare it to "how things used to be". It may end up causing damage to the good feelings and memories that you still have about one another. I mean could you see yourself talking to him as a friend "about your new boyfriend" or him talking to you about "his new girlfriend"? I think that would be painful and cause feelings of resentment. Only years down the road could you two handle such a frienship. Good Luck.

Answer 7

I completely understand. But as much as you want to be friends. It's gonna hurt you more. What if your on the phone just chatting and you find out he's with someone else.How much will that hurt you? As much as it hurts to say goodbye it's for the best! Good luck and remember don't cry because it's over smile because it happened! x x x

Answer 8

If you live in different countries this "relationship" is only going to go so far anyway.

If you feel too strongly about just being friends let him know that you'll stay in touch but for now you need to step back.

Answer 9

yes, as soon as u guys would be close again.... u'll start seeing each other. Before being close again, u both might have had other sexual encounters n adventures.... but the thing which clicked between u guys.... the chemistry.... u can't stop that.
u see when sodium is exposed to air.. it burns. U have to keep it away from air.... so its chemistry. Good Luck !!

Answer 10

If it is so wonderful why do you only want to be friends. Distance can't stop true love. I know for me personally it would kill me emotionally to let him go. Remaining pen pals might be the way to remain "friends" This is a real tough one, I think you know the answer. It's in your heart! Good luck!

Answer 11

if you really wanna know u can talk about it with him or just tell him that u still have feelings for him but you really want to be friends with him..trust me ive done that and it pretty much works but remember things dont always work the way u awnt them to it depends on the guy