I'm so upset. Nothing seems right. Starting with friends that ditched me for NewYear celebration, then poor raise at work, I dont' feel well - I got a flu, then last night my husband said something that really upset me. Since we won't celebrate New Year with our friends we originally planed to, he said we will be celebrating w/ friend of his, who is single, old, boring, drinks a lot. Three of us in the club. I don't like it. I told him I won't have any female to talk to. Because that guy doesn't have anybody. Plus other couple invited us to their house. My husband won't go there, even if he knows the people (they're more his friends then mine) and I accepted invitation. He says to me "okay if you don't want to go to the club with us I'll go with him. " What should I do? I'm so tired of arguing and his stupid comment is that I don't have respect for him 'cause I won't go to the club with him and his boring friend.
2006-12-28 02:52:30 · 14 answers · asked by Sandy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Your going to smile again when you decide it is time to count your blessings instead of your woes.
2006-12-28 02:55:43 · answer #1 · answered by justgr8buys 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you have every thing in comparison to your husbands friend. As you said he has nobody. Just look at it logically, there is always someone worse off than yourself. Does it really matter that you will not be spending time with the people you want. I say good on your hubby for making a stand. Snap out of it, or alternatively you go where you want and let your hubby do the same and then meet up at the end of the evening.
Which ever way you look at it, you really have not got it that bad, and maybe you should start looking at the positives in your life rather than the negatives.
Happy new year. x
2006-12-28 10:57:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You two are not respecting each others desires of interests ? Ouch . ! ! ! . . . Not a safe place to be in a relationship. Been there, done that.
The holidays can be sensitive time for feelings. My suggestion . . . this is not time to 'get into' the deeper issues of what needs to be addressed as is clearly showing here . . . If you can't agree of where to go together, then each go to where your interests lie with the communicated understanding that the two of you are going to make a 'date' about a week after the New Year to openly and clearly communicate the changes that have occurred in your relationship.
There are bigger issues going on here than New Years socializing events. Let the New Years social events go this year, you to attend together or separately the event(s) you choose . . . then, about a week after the New Year have a 'marriage meeting' to readjust out of step events that are going on. I wish you well.
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2006-12-28 11:03:34 · answer #3 · answered by onelight 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sandy, sounds to me there is a lack of understanding and communication all around. Try talking to your husband why he wants to go with this friend so badly, why it is so important to him. Does he owe this man a favor or something, does he feel sorry for him because he is all alone. Maybe if you find out why he is doing this you can be more objective. Remember to be happy you have to give. Sounds to me like you are tired of giving, and your husband does not give much, either way, try to understand his reasoning, and give to him what he wants, it is after all just one evening, and life is not always about you. If he sees you give to him more, I am sure he will come around and start listening and giving to you more. Some men understand more when you give in sweetly.. remember the old saying you can get more bees with honey, then vinegar.. Good Luck, you will smile again. Give and it will be given unto you...so try smiling and you will get tons of smiles back from your friends and those around you. Those friends that ditched you for New Year Celebration, are not worth worrying about, obviously they showed no loyalty to you, so you owe them nothing. Give to your husband, he is the one you owe your loyalty and love to.
2006-12-28 11:08:36 · answer #4 · answered by Mari-Mari 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well the flu is a good excuse... Simply tell him to have a good time without you stay home, that you aren't really feeling well anyways, & have a few drinks by yourself or invite a friend over just you and her... sometimes you just need some time to pamper yourself...Take advantage of it...
2006-12-28 10:56:21 · answer #5 · answered by momof3 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him go with his pal
...If he didn't want to do what you would have liked, why do you have to do what he would like, though it is clearly gonna be crap being singled out with no girl friend? What is he blabbing away about no respect...Let him go with his friend, you call some friends up and and do something you wanna do. Anything you want, anything you know that will make you smile.
2006-12-28 10:59:47 · answer #6 · answered by gnomus12 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I just got divored last month, and lost my job yesterday, and I have a son to take care of,( on my own, cuz it wasn't his.) Except for the flu part, I'd say your doing better than me......so stay in bed if you have the flu, nobody wants to catch it off you, and sleep it off, and quit your blubbering.
2006-12-28 11:05:57 · answer #7 · answered by INDRAG? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
right at midnight in the new years, make that you wish for the new year to not been depressed and sad anymore, go to the club and dance all night and have alto to drink and have a blast there
2006-12-28 12:33:56 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to the club with them and dance and flirt with every hot looking guy there. He'll be so jealous that he'll never suggest that you guys go to a club again.
2006-12-28 10:57:38 · answer #9 · answered by Tina 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him to go to the club an dyou go out with your friends or over to the couples house or you could compromise go to the club till ten the go to the other couples house or with the other poeple - DITCH HIM FOR THE NIGHT
2006-12-28 10:56:19 · answer #10 · answered by noel22f 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have learned that life is too short to be miserable with a mate that doesn't respect you or isn't any fun with you....find another, listen to "Drive" by the Cars, that speaks volumes about being alone.
2006-12-28 10:55:21 · answer #11 · answered by 666K9 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋