My husband, my son, and myself are court ordered to have paternity DNA testing done. I was court ordered to pay for and set up the testing. I have had to reschedule my husband's test multiple times. Once because he went to jail. Once because he got out of jail too quickly to have his test done, and now again because he says he has no transportation. My lawyer suggested I drive him to get it over with and guarantee he go to his test. But I want no contact with him and do not think it is my responsibility to arrange his transportation. How much can I actually be responsible for in this situation?
2006-12-28 01:28:05 · 10 answers · asked by vcstarr 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I know everyone will react with drive him to get it over with, but he has a history of violence towards women. I have no interest in being alone in a car with him.
2006-12-28 01:34:50 · update #1
My lawyer is working for a VERY discounted rate because I cannot afford much, so he's trying to get out of as much work as possible in the case. So he doesn't want to fight this in court if we can find a way around it, but I doubt my husband will cooperate.
2006-12-28 01:49:13 · update #2
If anyone knows any court orders, laws, etc... from MA that I can refer to about this kind of thing, please let me know. Then I have official back up. :)
2006-12-28 01:53:11 · update #3
Your husband has been ordered by the court to get tested but he has failed to comply. Keep records of the appointments you did set up, and then take those records to the judge who ordered the testing and ask that your husband be held in contempt for not complying. Throw the ball back into his court. The court cannot expect you to force your husband to take the test, only to perform due diligence. Having set up three appointments demonstrates that you have complied with the court. Your husband is the one who will be in trouble if he doesn't get his act together, IF you keep the court informed.
2006-12-28 01:33:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is a grown man who should be able to handle scheduling for transportation. Why can't he take a cab or a bus to the location of the test? However, if you were court ordered to pay for and set up the testing then you may be responsible for setting up transportation since he does not have any. Although you are not comfortable with taking him to the test it may be best for you to guarantee that he goes to do it. Good Luck!
2006-12-28 01:36:21 · answer #2 · answered by Michelle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a COURT ORDER. He should have to get there by his own means - it's not your responsibility. I suggest you play hard-ball with your lawyer, or better yet - get a new one. I don't know why you don't want any contact with him, or what the situation is, but I would think your lawyer should be protecting your best interests - and allow you to keep your distance. I think your only responsibility would be to have yours/your sons done. You are not responsible for your obviously, irresponsible husband.
2006-12-28 01:41:27 · answer #3 · answered by Bondgirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not your responsibility to transport another adult. However, you have to determine what is going to cost you less time, effort, resources. It is frustrating when you have to sholder the load for another person. There are some situations that simply do not have a good solution, it becomess a question of choosing the lesser evil. Apparently you have some contact with him to know that when he is in jail, etc. By standing by monitoring when its convenient for him to complete the test, you allow his schedule to dictate what you do. Don't let it drag out, bite the bullet and get it done. At lease you have the comfort of knowing that it is not pending any longer.
2006-12-28 02:10:09 · answer #4 · answered by msfeliz777 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do you want to reschedule it again? drive the bugger even if you don't want to, or pay for a cab it is not really your responsibility but he clearly does not want to go and is making it hard for you, get it over with so you can start fighting only once a month when he is short on the child support.
2006-12-28 01:33:13 · answer #5 · answered by ponitail 55 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like this guy is a nut case. I don't think that the lawyer should have suggested that you pick up a crazy deranged violent individual. If you feel threatened, don't follow that lawyers advice.
2006-12-28 01:41:43 · answer #6 · answered by toonice 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The court ordered you to do it and made it your responsibility. That's all you need to be concerned with. Listen to your lawyer.
Get it done.
2006-12-28 01:34:46 · answer #7 · answered by Le_Roche 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think u should do it just to get it over w/...and no your not responsible for this...but if u do it than it is sure to get done....and u can get it over w/!!!
2006-12-28 01:33:22 · answer #8 · answered by Rachel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if I were you, I would do what ever it takes to get it over with....get it behind you and move on with your life.....good luck
2006-12-28 01:30:50 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
close ur legs
2006-12-28 01:32:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋