I'm bi but sick of getting to much attention from boys. Untill yesterday I had very long blonde hair which I think was the best part of my looks. I'm in a submissive bdsm relationship with a male\female couple and they encouraged me to have it cut to help stop the attention because they don't like boys flurting with me either. Although I'm thinking it might be the dumbest thing I've ever done as not only have I lost my lovely hair but unfortunately I have big stick out ears that are getting me even more attention only its not from people being attracted to me but more just finding me funny looking with shawn hair and big ears. Although the couple I'm with are happy that I did what they wanted and say they want have to worry about men hitting on me much anymore. What do others think. Will boys leave me alone now and is losing my looks worth it?
I asked this question last night but for some reason I got a violation notice so I never got to see the answers so I'm asking it again.
2006-12-27 23:01:59 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Hon, your relationship pushed you to do something you regret. That's not a healthy relationship.
I know, as a sub, you want please your Master and Mistress, but if they were worth a damn as Doms they wouldn't have asked you to do something that would change how you see yourself in such a negative light.
Being submissive doesn't mean loosing who you are inside. I doesn't mean demoralizing yourself or lowering your self esteam. A good Dom would only encourage you to raise your self esteam, make you feel good for your submission to them, help you gain a feelings of worth for your submission.
I seriously think this relationship you're in is not a healthy one at all. Not if it's hurting your identity and self worth as a person.
Have a good cry and leave. Your hair will grow back, but in the meantime, get a hair fall.
And while you're recovering from this unhealthy relationship that forced your to do something so outwardly trivial, but very emotionally painful...I suggest you learn a bit about what it is to have a healthy BDSM relationship.
http://www.castlerealm.com/
(it's a web based D/s recourse center)
2006-12-28 04:10:29 · answer #1 · answered by DEATH 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am a submissive female and i guess i would have to wonder why They have issue with you being flirted with by other guys. If you are not responding or encouraging these men, then why should you have to "pay" for their attention. BDSM is built on trust... do They not trust you?? Plus, i tend to doubt the only reason men look at you is your hair. Usually there is a package that comes with the hair as well. In fact i know plenty of men who PREFER short hair on women... so either way you will get the attention. i think i would, however, really consider what is going on in Their heads wanting you to cut your hair. Seems to me it might be a jealousy or insecurity issue for Them. If you are not collared, i would grow my hair back and get my self with a Dom/me that does not seem to jealous of others and so superficial as to think cutting off your hair will solve Their issues.
2006-12-28 03:53:07 · answer #2 · answered by ? 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That you would cut off your hair, which you seemed to love to detract from your appearance is absurd. That you would cut off your hair to please a couple who get their sexual thrill from the idea of owning you is even more ridiculous.
There are other ways of discouraging guys from hitting on you. The word "no" seems popular. You might have also tried something like, "bugger off".
The next step in your life as you let your hair grow out is to find a real relationship. You know, one that makes you feel respected and gratified. Your current menage a trois a la bdsm doesn't seem to be affording you much in the way of mental health.
2006-12-27 23:12:06 · answer #3 · answered by castle h 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I doubt that will help. But if you're unhappy with your hair now, it grows out again. Not a permanent change, that's for sure. I recently went from long brownish-black hair to short ultra ash blonde, and if I don't like it, it's going right back to chestnut.
2006-12-28 00:12:15 · answer #4 · answered by Danagasta 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that is a message on your boyfriend! beware you've made your GF seem outstanding! at the same time as an acceptable female with a outstanding short haircut is going out at the same time with her predominately lengthy haired acquaintances, she will be able to standout and get all the adult males after her!!
2016-12-01 06:21:51 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shouldn't have rushed into it. You need to make sure you'll be okay with a decision, big or small. And no, I don't think it will discourage boys at all. Most boys flirt with anything in a skirt, whether they truly find her attractive.
2006-12-27 23:07:12 · answer #6 · answered by ☆Tąrą☆ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I prefer hair which is shoulder length or longer, And also since that men who like ladies are more often then not right, they like long hair because it looks more feminine, as most males have short hair.
2017-01-20 08:40:00 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
whether you have long hair or short, you are still beautiful. The boys pick on you because maybe you give them a sense of vulnerabilty..im sure you only did what you thght was best but what you really should have dne was confront them.
2006-12-27 23:19:32 · answer #8 · answered by Star 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
long hair is nice but requires upkeep and u have to grow that out for a long time
2017-02-28 01:24:49 · answer #9 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are beautiful I will hit on you with long or short hair
Maybe you should of went with a color change first.
2006-12-27 23:07:47 · answer #10 · answered by Normefoo 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋