Should I help her??? I think she just wants to use me.
2006-12-27 19:21:44 · 16 answers · asked by Princess 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Just say no....
2006-12-27 19:25:22 · answer #1 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
What she is asking you to do is completely unreasonable.
Don't feel guilty about turning that job down.
I'm sure you would help with babysitting and things like that but that is where I would draw the line.
If she wants you to help financialy help her out, that's too much to ask of you.
This is her problem. Not yours.
Christmas ad birthday presents? Fine. Helping with the birhday party planning? Fine. But not child support. That's the father's responsibility.
I can't believe she asked you that.
That's being just a little too needy.
Just tell her you will help her whenever you can and leave it at that.
Helping her raise her child would be a huge resposibility and task.
It would lessen your quality of life. It sounds like she just wants to use you.
I say.."No thank you to that. It could even cause huge arguments between you as to how best to raise the child. Your opinions would differ from time to time.
If she is SO tacky as to ask you that, then she is tacky enough to fly off the handle in anger, the first time you differed on how the child should be raised and discipline matter.
It's just a bad idea, no matter how you look at it.
You would start resenting each other after awhile.
It's worse than living with your boss. It's a social no no.
Tell her it's too risky. You don't want to damage the relationship you have with her.
Good Luck. I hope she understands. She might not. She couldn't be that smart. Look what she asked you to do, without hesitation or thinking that through first.
Whew! Just say, "No".
Again, Good Luck, sweetheart.
2006-12-28 03:39:52 · answer #2 · answered by Molly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. She's family, family exists to help each other out. It'll also keep her from considering abortion and possibly actually choosing to kill her kid through such a tragedy. It'll make the kid's life better having that support, and it'd be a way for you to develop a closer relationship with your family.
However, I'd talk about adoption - it could be another very good option.
2006-12-28 03:36:37 · answer #3 · answered by Surfin' Hawai'i 15 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you think she just wants to use you then offer your help as a sitter...a paid sitter. That way she you can interact with the child and she can still have social life. Tell her you will be there for emotionally, but you can't promise you can be there physically because of your own prior obligations.
2006-12-28 03:27:52 · answer #4 · answered by kathylouisehall 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok honey...
I just looked at your other questions.
In one of them you clearly state.. and I quote "she is often very critical and mean to me" ... referring to your cousin.
In another question you state you are 21 and still believe in Santa Claus.
Another one asks if your boyfriends dog took a crap on the rug should you clean it up...
You have some major issues.
Either you are asking fake, stupid questions, or you really REALLY need to seek professional psychiatric help.
Either way... if you put up with an abusive cousin and pic up your boyfriends dog crap, you all deserve each other.
Get a life!
2006-12-28 03:47:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you want to raise it get custody and raise it. If you don't you should still help her she is family.Whether she is using you or not at least you know that in your heart and in your mind that you are doing the right thing for the child. If she does not want this child she should consider adoption and maybe you could help her with that.
2006-12-28 03:24:58 · answer #6 · answered by Mary C 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
As long as you aren't the father, tell her to go find the babydaddy and let him fork out some cash.
If her immediate family is not offering to help her, they must know something about her character you don't (but suspect)
It is not your responsibility and you need to tell her NO NO NO,
unless you don't mind not having a life.
2006-12-28 03:25:22 · answer #7 · answered by Chris C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what? that's a strange request.
Why is she having a child she can't support?
Oh I would recommend social services and other treatment plans. Make sure that DAD is paying his fair share- married or not- he is financially responsible for that child until its 18 years old- BY LAW!
Sorry- if she wants you to be responsible for her child, she should allow you to have full parental rights too.
2006-12-28 03:26:54 · answer #8 · answered by Denise W 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just for you info illegitimate means "not real" believe me that child will be real.
2006-12-28 10:18:44 · answer #9 · answered by elaeblue 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well there you go. you answered your own question.
the child is not your responsibility.
if you'd like to help, the child is still not your responsibility unless you specifically claim it to be... even then, by law, it probably isn't, but you know what I mean
if you'd like to help but aren't responsible for it, i see nothing wrong with that. that would be very kind of you. kind for the child, not your cousin. that would be supporting your cousin's nasty farm animal, selfish deed, which isn't so kind of you.
yes, help the child, if you want. that would be kind of you.
2006-12-28 03:26:49 · answer #10 · answered by justwannaknow 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What about the babydaddy? Why isn't he helping out? You can help out if it won't be destructive to your future, but otherwise, you should encourage your cousin to consider adoption or abortion according to your beliefs.
2006-12-28 03:30:09 · answer #11 · answered by billb_tx 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋