Why are some black men jealous of black women's accomplishments?

Question

Why are some black men jealous of black women's accomplishments and accuse her of being a sellout? Some brothers will even go as far as to say sisters didn't work damn hard to get where they are and that the white man just handed them these opportunities? A lot of black men complain that black women are gold diggers when sisters are often times more successful and more likely to graduate college then black men? A lot of black men like to blame black women saying they don't need them and are too independent when it was their unreliablity and inability to support the family that made her so career focused in the first place?

Answer 1

I have seen this kind of thing, and as much as I would like to give you an answer, I think I can only guess as to why. My best response would be that if a person is not doing well in life, then the envy the feel for others becomes anger if there is some difference between them and the other person. If that person already sees the other as being lesser in the social order than themselves, then they have an even bigger chip on their shoulder.

Answer 2

See people often forget that women's liberation was completely different for white and black women. White women left their homes to work because they chose to which resulted in the break down of their homes. Black women, always had to work since they been in this country so feminism and black women working had little to do with the destruction of the black family. Drugs like heroin, cocaine and crack to me had a much bigger effect on the family unit. Black men at times do sound a little sour when discussing black women and make assumptions about them being stuck up or having certain attitudes just because she's educated or accomplished. To me, that's only a few brothers with chips on their shoulders because a real strong brother would value a strong independent sister as an asset.

Answer 3

Wow! someone has really made you angry. Yes lots of Black women are doing more positive things than SOME Black men but not ALL. I believe many men can feel a bit inferior if their women are making more money. I would not go as far as to say jealous though. I do often wonder what kinda woman raised the man of any race that can walk up to people and ask for a quarter.

Answer 4

Regardless of race, we live in a patriarchal society in which men are perceived to be the "stronger" of the sexes, whether it be financially, intellectually or emotionally. The truth of the matter is (perhaps particularly so in the black race) that more often than not women remain the "backbone" of the family unit, the "glue" that holds the family together. Our earliest learning experiences from infancy on are not initially from our Fathers, but from our Mothers. On some subconscious level some men are aware of this and feel slighted because the primary caretaker and teacher in their child's life is not themselves, but rather their child's Mother. This perhaps may be one of the initial origins of some men's future negative feelings towards women. Later these feelings may escalate and be erroneously displaced, manifesting themselves in other areas of life, including (but not limited to) some women's financial and professional abilities. Jealousy can be viewed as being an immature reaction that deceptively masks ones inner feelings of insecurity.

Answer 5

First of all, a real black man is not jealous of a women's accomplishments. My ex-husband always accused me of being "white" just because I held down two great professional jobs, saved money and carried myself like a lady! All the while he was blowing every dime he made, drinking himself to death and going out with different women!! Well, I had enough of him trying to hold me back and I filed for divorce. Since I've divorced him, I have furthered my education, maintained my jobs and purchased my dream home, I'm just now 30!! He's living in a shabby apartment and working a minimum wage job. He's also constantly calling me to get me back in spite of the fact that we have been divorced over 3 years. I feel he was jealous because he was insecure within himself. I don't feel a real man has jealous feelings toward a successful woman. Only someone who is insecure.
The gentleman I've recently starting dating always tells me how proud he is of me and that he wants to be like me. He says that he sees me as a strong black woman and an excellent role model. They fact that I am successful, independent and with no children is a major positive.

Overall, this question depends on the man. I real man would not feel intimidated by a woman's success. Black or White.

Answer 6

Its an excuse for Black men like that to say that: for instance, if she admits she needs a little financial assistance to help meet her needs she is labled Gold Digger. If she has her own crib, car, and is a business Executive making loads of cash, she is dubbed too independant and then the guy remains jealous and has the balls to say the White man handed her the riches. It is a ploy to detract our attention from the fact that most Black men are tired of us anyway because we are their complexion and they go venture to find new things leaving us in the cold, and call us cold and callus. But I am smart, beautiful, and worthy to be loved. Men(of all colors) don't be jealous, just thank God for Strong, black women who have found their way.

Answer 7

I feel u. but ever since the end of slavery there has always been this vibe between a black men and black women. read the willie lynch essay it explains everything. U know that this society is very patriarchal. u know the man is suppose to be the one that makes the most money so he can provide for his family. but times are changing. and thats makes a black men very insecure. and i am glad that black women are getting better jobs and suceeding in life. It also gets rid of that stereotype of black women being ghetto and gold diggers. i see it like this: this just gives them an excuse to find them a white woman. plain and simple.

Answer 8

Well, in general most men are jealous of some womens accomplishments. Some men think that women should just stay at home and cook and clean and the men hould make the money. It's just that most pimps etc are black and those are the kinda people who think that women are only good for one thing. Just ignore them, find a great guy who will accept you for all your accomplishments, who knows he might even be black! lol

You know the saying: If you can't find a good black guy, find good white guy!!!

Answer 9

Well you are right. Minority men usually like to keep their women in a level lower than them. It is a univeral macho thing. The world is changing and men have to accept that women are their equals. So a racist, black man may say the woman is a sellout cuz she accomplished something he may not have been able to.

Answer 10

HEY ALL THE SMART GIRLS CAME ON OUT TONIGHT. I WAS WONDERING WERE YALL WAZ AT. RIGHT ON. I am not going to get into this fight because everyone was well said and all points were well taken. All I can say is I can see the situation from all points of view and a little of every answer have valid points as well as the question. Okay I see the sisters don't bother to answer any stupid questions that's were you were. LOL