want to get pregnant?

Question

i am 16 and my boyfriend and I are in love, and i know you are thinking that we don't know what love is but we have been together for 1 yr and 7 mths and i still get butterflies when i see or think about him. I have been constantly thinking about how bad I want to have a baby and i don't really understand why please give me some advice cuz i am confused and wish i didn't feel this way. I am to the point where i want the condom to break( I am on the pill also)

Answer 1

It is a natural human behavior...we are animals after all. But, we are also cognitively aware enough to know that bringing up a child in a low income family is not always the wisest thing to do. You will need an income...and he might not be willing to stay with you, marry you and become a good father. More than likely, you will both be forced to forgo education--which otherwise would provide more income in the long run if you two had it. Also, marrying young, historically, has had its problems. Statistically, even though you two might be outliers, couples who marry when they are young are more apt to have greater problems and divergence as they grow older...for a variety of reasons.

Answer 2

COST:From pregnancy test through delivery, anywhere between $6,800 and $10,600.Their first year will cost about $11,000. If you go back to work, childcare can cost as much as $3,000 to $4,500 in your baby's first year.Clothing and shoes may cost about $600. A stroller, changing table, crib, car seat, etc. cost considerably more: between $2,000 and $6,000. Even diapers add up to a major expense. By the time your baby is toilet trained, you'll have spent at least $1,600 on diapers. Between the ages of five and thirteen, your child's needs and desires for food, clothing, shoes, toys, music and movies, etc. to grow as steadily as the cost of supplying them. You can easily spend an average of $600 a year on extracurricular activities,

:
You will need the stuff listed above just by the time the baby arrives

Bedding:
Blankets
Mattresses
Baby Pillows
Baby Bed Sets
Crib Sets
Cradles/Bassinets

ROOM DECOR:
Valences
Wall Hangings
Mobiles
Lamps
Lampshades
Mirrors
Rugs

FURNITURE:

Changing Tables
Dressers
Gliders
Rocking Chairs
Cradles & Bassinets
Crib Sets



Toy Chest
Growth Chart
Play Pens
Play Arches
Baby Swings


High Chairs
Boosters
Bibs
Bouncer Seats
Table Chairs


Mobile
Sound Machine
Baby Tub
Tub Seat
Tub Mats
Hooded Towels
Bath Toys

Baby Monitor
Safety Gates
Bumpers

You should really go over this list with your boyfriend and do some research to find out what it really takes to raise a baby, obviously not just love. And i only put about half of the things you will need, that's not the whole list. Don't break the condom and stop taking your birth control pills yet, you should atleast wait about 2 more years before you do that, and since you and your boyfriend are so madly in love, you two should still be together by then. Then you can get married and then you can have your baby.
Enjoy being a teenager while you can,because once you have a baby you will be considered an adult.
Good Luck!!!!

Answer 3

It is hormones and the thought of sharing something special with the one you love.

Best advice is to defiantly wait. Having a baby is not all about having butterflies and having that warm feeling when holding him or her. Lots of money, stress, time and patience is placed in to a baby that grows up. Go to the parenting board on here and you will see a lot of these parents having issue's. Do you want those issue's at 16? With little or none support of family or financial, no matter if you two working or not..as teens can't hold a good enough job, especially while in school, to pay for a baby and also pay for themselves. Plus, it puts a lot of stress on to the family unit you want to create. A lot of relationships go rocky once a baby is born.

If you two really love eachother, you two can wait until you two are ready, with out dependance from others and able to be on your own and support your own selves.

Almost 2 years is actually a short time. Give it more time. Honestly, get butterflies about marriage. If you two are 18 or 19, still together and still madly in love on your own, I say get going on the marriage part and then focus on starting a family. Studies have shown that starting a family first, will most likely end with no marriage.

So goodluck.

Answer 4

From experience - wait. Get your education, get yourself set up in life (education, good job, home) and then have children.
I didn't plan to have my oldest child, but surprise, surprise there she was. I love her and I wouldn't change a thing about my life, except that I wish she had been born when I was 26, not 16.
The person you are now at 16 is not the person you will be at 20 - and that person at 20 will be nothing like the person you will be at 25. Give yourself the time to mature and grow into the best possible person to raise a child.
I won't say that you cannot be in love at your age, but I will say that there is so much in life that you and he just don't understand yet - so many things that you need to and deserve to experience that cannot be done with a child.
So my advice: Experience life! I consider from 18-25 to be your time to live for you! To live experience all the wonderful things that you won't be able to when you're saddled with "life" responsibilities. If this man is truly the love of your life then he will go along on the journey with you. Don't wake up someday and say "I wish we would have....".
Trust me -- I love my daughter, but even she will tell you that being raised by teen-aged parents wasn't a picnic. There is a drastic difference in her childhood versus that of her younger siblings who born at a time when I was more emotionally mature and financially stable. She will also be the first to tell you that having lived that life she has no plans to have children before she's 25.

Answer 5

I'm 19 and with the boyfriend of my dreams. I too have thought of having a baby with him. Guess when....at 16 yrs old. Now that we have been going out for 3 & 1/2 years, i don't know what i was thinking. we have so much fun together and with a baby, it would eliminate. I still want to have a baby but i now seems like a beter time. Enjoy you youth, and just remember the longer you wait the more the excitement will build up.

Answer 6

This is actually a familiar feeling. A lot of teenage girls feel this way. It's normal. Consider this though, you are only 16 and your boyfriend probably isn't too much older......you both have a lot of growing to do. It's difficult to grow up with someone and not grow away from them. You have a whole lifetime ahead of you to give birth.

I dated my ex boyfriend for nearly three years. We were in love for the first year and a half. Then things changed along the line, I was maturing, he wasn't. I had goals. He dropped out of school. I was exploring the world, he was stagnating. Then we became a three. I gave birth to our child. It was a wonderful birth and a great experience. The pregnancy brought a lot of turmoil and worry. I worried about school and money and myself and the baby and everything that comes with being a mother. I worried a lot. So I educated myself. I took parenting classes, read books, wrote a lot about what I want my child to have, looked up resources to free stores, and things like that. I didn't get a job. My ex couldn't understand that no one wants to hire a pregnant 15/16 year old. He was 18. He didn't work or go to school, didn't have any idea what we were going to do with this child, was totally completely immature about the whole thing. After I had the baby things got even worse. He was used to me catering to him. He was my center of attention. Then came baby and baby was (and still is) my center. This causes a lot of stress on a relationship. Our relationship got even worse. He got abusive. I got depressed. It was a rocky road to say the least. Now we are broken up and have been since my daughter was three months old. I regret nothing. He is no longer in the picture. I finished high school, moved out. I am doing okay for being 19. I was lucky to have support from my family. They made sure I had everything I needed for myself and my child. Being a teen mom is tough. You lose a lot of your friends. They all want to drink and party or shop and you are stuck out of the loop because you are pre occupied with your child.

There is a time and a place in life to have a child. Do you think you are there yet? Maybe you could try getting a pet to share together? Or babysitting?

Answer 7

It's natural to think about wanting a baby :)

You're 16.... yes you may be in love but you cannot be stable enough to provide for a child.

I'm 20 and I am such a different person than I was when I was 16.. give yourself some time to grow as an individual before bringing a baby into the picture.

If you love him enough to want to have a baby now, your love will still be as strong in say 5 years, when you are ready and able to give a baby a great life. I'm sure you will make a good mommy one day.. just don't make it today.

Good luck ;)

Answer 8

I think it's pretty natural to want a baby at this age - I'm 17, and I would love a baby, and I don't even have a boyfriend. I know some of my friends feel the same way. It's the stupid estrogen. But please don't do it. Get yourself a good education, and just hold off. Having a baby now will make your life that much harder - we've still got a lot of growing up to do ourselves.

It might help to talk to someone about it in person - your mom or boyfriend or just somebody.

Answer 9

I dont Understand why u want to get p regant so early i can relate to you by saying u get butterflies and ur in love an everything but Understand your only 16 No offense that is still a baby u have your whole life ahead of you why do u want to waiste it by getting pregnant that young If iwere you i would wait till your really ready kuz once u have a baby its over No more freedom you wouldnt be able to get to party if u do stuff like that your constantly waking up and taking care of it and most portantly your still in school i imagine so why would u wanna get pregant at that age do yourslef a favor wait till your older like maybe 18-19 or even 20

Answer 10

Get a puppy , and if you can take care of him , and I mean vet shots ,cleaning up the crap , the hollaring and yowelling, aaaannnnd get you boy friend to SHARE the responsibility, then you'll find out if he's just there to sow his oats or if he's in for the long haul . Either way there is a price YOU and only YOU will have to pay. and there is NO avoiding this . YOU WILL LOSE YOUR CHILD HOOD AND YOUR FREEDOM . THAT IS FACT. EVEN if you decide to give your child up for adoption . the memory WILL be with you the REST OF YOUR LIFE UNTILL THE DAY YOU DIE. as a parent , you will never NOT have children . its a life long comitmen , please allow me to reiterate that untill it becomes redundant . A LIFE LONG COMITMENT. that never goes away . Look at a 46 year old woman with 1 child ,then look at a 46 year old woman with no children .the one with the kid is wore out ,gray and wrinkeld . the one without has kept her youth , she didn't give it away to her kids. ( i can feel the hate mail comming) as the plastic surgons inject more collogen. live life while you got the chance . you cant aford to when you have a kid. it's always '' i'm sorry friends wecouldn't find a sitter for thekids '' 3-5 years is all your by friend is gonna put in on that ,and you can check those stats on anny site .and you want to know why ? cause young men are selfcenterd ,self absorbed , egotistical arrogant asshole that tthink with the wrong head. Iknow , Iwas a young man once myself . so , if you want to know if you should have a kid , think of it financaly. DAYCARE 4-600 AMONTH. RENT ON A TWO BD APT. 5-800 AMONTH , CLOTHS ,CAR SEATS , LAUNDRY , DIAPERS, IT GOES ON AND ON AND ON . Night on the town for fun ? nonexistent for the firts 5 years . Been there done that . I started my family at 29. and i didn't want to then ,, now , i wouldn't give it up for the world!!!!!!!