I have dated him on and off for about 1 1/2 years. I was in an accident and am trying to get completely healed, out of debt, and financially straight before marrying. I also need for my son to be old enough to drive himself to school as it is about 17 miles from where will be living b/c he has been in that school system with his friends since kindergarten. His son goes to school in the county we will be living in and I will be taking him to school. He says he is willing to wait, but I know he wants to marry sooner.
2006-12-27 18:07:57 · 19 answers · asked by MimGregg 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
In my accident I suffered a closed head injury that has now disabled me. I am still trying to learn how to do things, and live closer to rehab. Also, I am not able to drive very far by myself due to these injuries.
2006-12-27 18:27:01 · update #1
In my opinion that is not long at all. If the man loves you , then he should be willing to wait for you. I am sorry to hear about your accident and that you are not just thinking about yourself. It seems to me that your main concern is for the kids and that is wonderful. I just wished that more parents would think like you if they were put in the same situation that you are in. My mom pulled me out of school in CA to move to WA to get married to my step-dad. I had to start all over again with friends and it really did take a toll on me. I felt like I was an outcast because I did not know anyone. You are the only one that knows what you are going through and what is right for you. If your gut tells you to wait, then I would wait. Good Luck and God Bless!!
2006-12-27 18:36:55 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
A different perspective: I have to wonder why becoming completely healed from an accident has anything to do with why you need to hold off getting married...you have to be all moved in when you are married? you can't drive your son a 1/2 hr or 45 mins a day for a year or two, to school or meet a bus somewhere? What is your son 12? He can adapt..he would be still in middle school, and he would be entering in before high school starts...the two boys can bond more if they go to the same school, no? Are you sure that these reasons might not just be superficial in some way? 2 to 3 years is a long time. Make sure you are being true to yourself in regard to wanting to marry this man.
2006-12-27 18:24:01 · answer #2 · answered by What, what, what?? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
3 a million/2 years is honestly no longer too long in case you're satisfied to attend that long. i realize it truly is not as long, yet as quickly as I get married i could have been engaged for 2 a million/2 years. We have been waiting to get engaged and we'd have liked to get engaged, yet we'd have liked to attend till we are in a greater effective place to get married in the past we do. while we get married we could have been at the same time for 7 years. in case you're satisfied being engaged for a whilst, then do it. some human beings have looked somewhat placed off with my long engagement, asking "why?" all the time, yet do no longer enable it complication you and endure in innovations which you do no longer could desire to respond to to every physique else! relish you're engagement, that's a blast!! solid success :)
2016-10-28 13:00:37 · answer #3 · answered by dembinski 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In most cases I would consider 2 or 3 years a little on the long side but you make a valid point.
It WOULD be easier on you to wait til your son can drive himself to school.
It sounds like you have a loving and understanding fiance.
Since he is willing to wait, I don't see a problem in your waiting a couple of years.
CONGRATULATIONS!
2006-12-27 18:13:19 · answer #4 · answered by Molly 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
why would that be to long when you have the rest of your lives to be married? I know people that have been engaged 5yrs...there is no set time limit and usually the people who rush are the ones getting into trouble with their marriages...don't rush and do what you feel is right...if he says he is willing to wait then go with what he says he may want to marry sooner but he has also said he is willing to wait...
2006-12-27 18:27:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why not just really talk to him, if he isn't ok with it he will tell you so. I don't think it is too long, but then again what do I know? I was engaged for 5 years before we got married. Worked for us. Go for what works for all of you, not what would work for all of us.
2006-12-27 18:14:19 · answer #6 · answered by misstigeress 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think it's too long. if you are really convinced you are right for each other and you will eventually get married, limit your engagement to 1.5 yrs at the most, any longer and it seems as though you are unsure of your feelings.
2006-12-27 18:17:47 · answer #7 · answered by prettyme 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever heard of that new saying "I'm just not that into you"? If you are that structured about your life, and unwilling to jump in for LOVE, then maybe you might want to re-evaluate how you really feel about this man.
2006-12-27 18:19:26 · answer #8 · answered by tired 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I have witnessed couples waiting more than ten years to marry.
An long engagement is up to the couple, not society.
2006-12-27 20:25:14 · answer #9 · answered by LC 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just a humble opinion on my part: Yes. But don't marry if you are not committed to it for life.
2006-12-27 18:13:01 · answer #10 · answered by taxigringo 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋