Help..this is sooo unfair!!!!?

Question

hello, I am 14 and I watch my 5 year old brother on a daily bases, because both of my parents work during the day. My brother is really out of control, he listens to NOTHING I say. I have tried to tell both of my parents calmy and I've done everything, but, they just don't care because they don't have to deal with him during the day. Well, when my mom get's home after work, my brother won't listen to her either. So, my mom and dad both decided that whenever my brother gets in trouble I am punished instead of him. Because they say I am the one who is setting a bad example. When I am not. My brother swears and I am not the person teaching him that. My brother pushes people at school, and I am not the person responsible for that. What should I do?!?! This is unfair

i mean i watch him after we get home from school. duh!

Answer 1

You should be in school and so should he during the day.

Why watching him?

Discuss your parents putting him into after school daycare program or a babysitter. Then I would sign up for activities: sports, youth organizations and community events that will 1) prove you can be a good example 2) Get yourself out to be a teen and have fun. Not a built in babysitter.

Answer 2

Don't you hate when parents do that? Seems like no fair way out! Well guess what I am a parent and here to give you some advice...

Sit them down and act very grown up. Do not whine or complain, just simply state you can't handle it anymore and you need help.

Demand help. Tell them it is not your fault and you don't wish to be held responsible and you shouldn't! Make sure you explain what goes on.

Keep a log of your brother's actions. Write a date and time and write out the bad thing he did. Show your parents at the end of the day.

Pick a time to talk to them when they aren't busy. Usually right after supper when the table is all cleared is good.

If none of this works give your brother some discipline. When he swears say "(name) don't swear! Would you do that in front of mommy?" if he does it again say "This is your last warning do it again and I'll have to call mommy/give you a time out!" If he still persists in the bad thing follow through with the punishment, call your mother or father at work or give him a 3 minute time out in a chair in the corner.

Make sure you are heard but always remember do not cry! I learned this as a teenager. Parents always back away when you cry. Just act mature and like an adult (don't get sassy though
:-P).

I hope I was able to help honey!

Answer 3

As a mother I would say find him an after school activity. Soccer, wrestling, basketball, something with a coach. Let him pick and make sure he LOVES it. The coach will offer guidance as well as u, the game will teach him structure and playing by the rules, the activity will take up alot of his time (sorry urs too but you could meet alot of new people also) he will also have to practice, and at 5 he becomes it! And now u also have a bargaining chip with him, and also if he gets way out of hand, a new punishment, Fair, maybe not, but life's not fair and that's a lesson everyone has to learn. Better sooner than later. So try rec. centers, check with the schools, network with his friends parents, and find something that interests your little brother. If hes got something to do and occupy him than u have alot less behavior problems. And a little more time for you I hope!

Answer 4

I was in the same position as you when I was 14 and I understand where you are coming from. Parents tend to punish the older child for the younger child's mistakes because parents believe that the older one is setting a bad example. Your parents are relying on you to teach and discipline your brother, when the responsibility is theirs and not yours. That is unfair because you are only 14 and you need a life to yourself. Why should you have to discipline him when they don't? Your parents rely on you to be the little parent. All you need to do is to tell your parents that you are not babysitting anymore until they make changes and you start doing things to get your brother in trouble and get your parents upset. Therefore, your parents might realize how you feel. Otherwise, hopefully your brother will mature soon and understand one day.

Answer 5

Wow!!! Hmmmmm........guess what? All little 5 year old boys are just the same, actually he sounds just like my little 5 year old boy......Mum and Dad probably don't mean to put so much stress on you cos they love their kids so much. They're just stressed with adult stuff like the phone bill, the mortgage..... blah blah blah. I'm sure you mum and dad want to tear their hair out half the time too. Wot u do is BE the parent for your little brother when mum and dad are at work. So, when he swears, yells, gives cheek, takes food in the loungeroom etc...... tell him to stop being naughty and to play nicely. Warn him that if he does it again you will put him in his room for 10 minutes. The first few times he may very well just laugh at you. Be tough girl, when he does it again just calmly pick him up, carry him to his room tell him he has to have time out in his room for 15 minutes, close the door and WALKAWAY. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES SHOULD YOU THREATEN TO PUT HIM IN HIS ROOM AND NOT ACTUALLY DO IT IF HE STILL PLAYS UP!! It'll be really tough, but sweetie, he's only 5 and he's just testing his boundaries. In other words, he's just trying you out, seeing what he can get away with........It works, believe me, it'll be a bit tough for you at first, but just try it and let him scream it out in his room. When he realizes you mean business, he'll behave a bit better, for a while anyway.......Don't hit him though, that's way too mean and anyway wot would that teach him????? Only violence. Hang in there babe, you can do it........Good Luck :)....Let us know how you go. :)

Answer 6

Tell your parents that, that is just how kids his age act. If you watch him during the day try and do something educational with him. When he doesn't listen to you send him to time out. If he is doing wrong he should be punished too.

Answer 7

Do you have grandparents or aunts and uncles? Ask them to talk to your parents. If my grandchildren called me with this kind of problem I'd have a real word or two with my daughter. They are pushing their responsibility off on someone to young to handle it. Punishing you for your brothers bad behavior is outrageous. I really feel sorry for you because you are really powerless here. Good luck sweetheart.

Answer 8

You should be in school your only 14 years old!Also if your parents are like that then i can only say the best way to do things with your little brother is by bribing to get to know him better.

NOTE:this might take lots of cash.

Answer 9

it is unfair alright! All you can do is try to talk to them again, and perhaps suggest hiring a babysitter. Of course, you can also talk to another member of the family, or a teacher/counsellor you trust, that can explain to them what's going on. The best thing you can do, finally, is to try to cope with the situation. I know it sounds impossible but in time it will get much easier :)

Answer 10

this is a simple simple question- whenever there is a snowstorm (if you live in a state where it snows) you just tell him (ur little brother) that you are gonna burry him in the snow and that ur parents will think that its funny! then after he is burried you just "forget" he is there and then you won't have to deal with your lil brother untill spring when the snow is melted- although he will be frozen like an ice cube!