Ok, I'm 16. I LOVE babies. I'm always trying to get my fiancee to get me pregnant, but he won't. So he promised me that he would give me one a few months after I turn 17 so I'll have it when I'm 18. So I thought about it and I wasn't sure if he'd want to because I'm moving in with him when I'm 18 and I seriously doubt he'd want to put up with a newborn baby as soon as we moved in with each other.
Now he says that he wants to wait, but he promised. So then I got sad. And now he says he'll give me one when I turn 17. But now I feel like I'm making him give me one.
Some one please help!
2006-12-27 15:43:03 · 21 answers · asked by happily_taken16 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
okay I'm 17 years old and i might be pregnant myself i am terrified about telling my parents I'm engaged and we are both excited. I love babies as well i want to be a day care owner but just because you love kids doesn't me that you are ready to raise and take care of one of your own 24-7. I think that if your fiancee is not open to the idea without making promises and your persuasion then he is telling you he isn't ready the baby deserves to have two parents ready to care for it and willing to. You two may love each other i don't doubt that but live together a couple months maybe a year and just enjoy married life before rushing into a family!
2006-12-27 15:50:11 · answer #1 · answered by Yielle 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know that you probably won't listen to this, but DON'T have a baby. You are 16 and just a baby yourself Right now you need to be concentrating on finishing high school and going to college. No offense, but I'm pretty sure you will have a miserable life if you have a baby. If you have a baby you will have to financial support it; that is expensive. A pack of diapers alone costs like 10 bucks (i think, i don't have kids). Not to mention the cost of clothing, sheltering, providing medical care, food, etc.
If you don't believe having a baby is difficult, to spend a day and night with someone that does have a baby. You will see it is not all fun and games. You can't just ignore a baby b/c you want to go out with friends, watch TV, or even sleep.
Get an education and a good job. Get finanically stable and then have a family, you will also enjoy it more that way.
2006-12-27 23:54:46 · answer #2 · answered by Answer Girl 2007 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, you really do seem to be putting a lot of pressure on him. You both need to talk about the good and the bad of having a baby. He may be thinking about these things and that's what's causing him to want to wait.
Money is a big issue. Health care. Job security. What if you have more than one child? Would having a child affect either of your career goals? Are you both still in or planning on school?
There are lots of questions & they should each be discussed and answered before you jump into parenthood because you 'LOVE babies'.
Have you read parenting books or taken parenting classes? Get all the facts first & then decide when the best time is. Make sure you can give your baby everything and still have a life with your future husband.
2006-12-27 23:50:43 · answer #3 · answered by bionicbookworm 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh my honey! You are looking at having a baby like it's a toy!
A baby takes your whole life to commit to! You never can just back out and throw it away, you can't say "I'm bored" and give it up. I know this is going to sound hard coming from a stranger but Wait.
I am a mom, I had my first child at 18 (i was married) and it was a mistake, a beautiful baby girl mistake. I waisted my youth taking care of a baby (and believe me I love them too). Trust me, a mother who knows is trying to save your youth.
If your fiance loves you he will wait until the right time, like after your married and moved in.
Can you even support your baby? Most places wont hire under 18. How are you going to pay for clohes, food, diapers, hospital bills, etc. I suggest you see how much this is going to cost you...
Try to remeber most moms today are in their late 20s early 30s and you will be a mother who can't drink, or drive past certain hours (depends on state), can't gamble, or smoke,get a good job, have her diploma or do anything an adult can. Finish school, see how your relationship works... Talk it over with someone you KNOW and TRUST.
You are to young to have a baby. Please take my advice sweety... I hope things work out! Good Luck and God Bless
2006-12-28 00:15:41 · answer #4 · answered by .j,kjhgd,jghf 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are way to young to think about having kids. Just because they are cute, they don't stay that way. And it is very different having your own kids than it is playing with someone else's baby. It will change your life and his dramatically and is a huge sacrifice. You should be concentrating on school and your future before you have kids so you can give them a better life and be a happier person yourself. I think if your boyfriend does not want kids yet you should not force him, he will resent you in the long run for it and it will affect your relationship. Wait until you are financially ready and emotionally. You may think you are, but a 16 you're still a kid. If you have kids now say goodbye to everything fun and hello to a huge responsibility. You will no longer have the freedom to just do whatever you want, and you can also say sayonara to a social life, having children is a full time job and responsibility!!!!
2006-12-27 23:53:00 · answer #5 · answered by MRod 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you serious??? You sound ridiculous. How old is this guy that is going to give you a baby??? Do you not want to do anything with your life, you have a choice, grow up and live a little. Then have kids and enjoy the time with your kids. Not when your still a kid yourself. You're not even living with this guy...alot changes when you live with a guy. You two might not even be together when you turn 18. Come on now...talk to someone. Like a teenage mother who has a baby at 17. Babies are wonderful and pure miracles, but don't bring one into this world when your still a kid.
2006-12-27 23:51:57 · answer #6 · answered by *ashley* 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
At least one of you has their head screwed on straight. The funnest thing about babies is when you get to give them back--a fact you will realize when you have a baby of your own. Pushing your 'fiancee' for a baby now is a surefire way to make him run away going mach 5 with his *** on fire. Some things you might want to consider:
Raising a kid will cost you at least $500,000 over the next 18 years--it might be a good idea to have a diploma if you ever hope to earn that kind of money.
Saddling a teenage boy with fatherhood is a surefire way to make sure he ISN'T a father.
Try living for yourself before you decide to live for someone else. Biological imperatives aside, in most developed societies it's a good idea to take advantage of the 'living independently' option, just so you know you can.
And to answer your initial question, YES you are making him get you pregnant. He's sent some pretty strong signals that he doesn't want to be a daddy just yet, and I'd say he's the smart one of the pair of you.
2006-12-27 23:55:52 · answer #7 · answered by shoujomaniac101 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
So you've got a great job and bought your own house and have enough money to put a kid through college and your only 16 ? Great job.
Of course if you don't, then you've got no business trying to have a baby. Kids take a lot of money and require a lot of hard work. Babies are not pets. Don't forget to tell your boyfriend that he will be legally responsible for support also. I'm sure he'll want to get you pregnant then.
Try using that lump on your shoulders called a head. People like you drive me nuts.
2006-12-27 23:57:30 · answer #8 · answered by Carman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are so YOUNG!!!! Please don't rush into having babies, I know you love them and want to have a child with the man that you love, but it doesn't sound like he is ready. I would suggest moving in together, getting married and build up a nice little nest egg and THEN have a baby together. Be 16, and 17, and 17, and 19, and 20.....these are the best years of your life, ENJOY THEM, go party with your friends. Wait until he says he wants to have a child b/c HE wants one, not just you.
2006-12-27 23:49:36 · answer #9 · answered by Aubrey's Mommy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As a Mom of 2, who had her kids young I suggest you really sit down and think about wanting and planning to have kids at such a young age. There's a lot that comes with having a child. Are you able to financially provide for this child?You may love babies,but it's different when they are yours and you can't give them back to their parents at the end of the day. Are you ready for the responsibility of having a baby?Mentally,physically and emotionally? I'm not trying to be mean,but as a young Mom it's really hard. With a kid it's hard to do things you want to do. Go to school, get an education, be financially stable. Get yourself right and together and then have a baby. Don't get me wrong I love my kids,but sometimes I wish I'd waited. You are young enjoy your youth
2006-12-28 00:03:03 · answer #10 · answered by jade_143 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋