How do you trust your boyfriend when he does nothing but acuse you of cheating?

Question

My bf and I have been together for four months and during this time it seems that while I'm at school he is at home. But while I'm at school his friends call him up and tell him that guys are talking to me and that they keep trying to take me away from him. He says hat he doesn't belive them and he trust me, which he should because the thing is that I don't even like to talk to too many people because it does nothing but cause a problem for me and him. But then again if I am at home with my mom and he calls and I say that I really cant talk he always thinks that I am cheating. It really makes no sense because no matter what I'm always with him everyday until eleven pm which is the time that my mom says that I cant have anymore visitors. I just don't know what to think sometimes, and when I do think about it sometmes I think he is feeling a sort of guilt himself.

Answer 1

Hi there.

I think he is terribly insecure, and apparently your reassurances don't work. You are correct in thinking maybe he's projecting his own guilt onto you. I'd be very careful. It is entirely possible he's up to no good. I think you need to have a talk with him and tell him one last time that you're not cheating... tell him what you're telling us. If he doesn't understand or start to trust you, I think you're better off without him... this can only get worse if it isn't stopped right now.

You live with your mom so this tells me you're quite young. I don't know why he'd be so insecure/jaded at such an age but maybe if you can just talk to him you'll find out what worried him so much. And his friends don't sound so good either. Just be careful and if he stressed you out too much there are plenty of fish in the sea who won't be suspicious.

Answer 2

Firstly I want you to know I reported that mathmaticia idiot!! What a terrible thing to say to you!!! Some people!

Now...
Let me just say. As difficult as it is. Until this boy gets control of his self-esteem issues his behavior isn't going to change. In fact he may get worse.
As much as you like him you should care about yourself and your safety more. If this boy really cares for you I think he wouldn't try to keep questioning your loyalty to him and the relationship you have. Maybe the possibility exists that he is fooling around. By attacking your character you won't question his. Talk to him.
In my honest opinion I really just think you should break off this relationship. Jealousy isn't healthy or productive. Out of my own personal experience a boy who shows this much unnecessary and unjustified jealousy 4 mos. into a relationship will become abusive eventually. I'm sorry that you are hurting so much but you have the right to a life and friendships [male and female] outside of this relationship. You are not his possession. When you are in a caring and trusting relationship both people want only good things for each other. That includes a happy social life.
There are boys out there who have much more to offer you. Don't get yourself bogged down by someone who doesn't have any self-esteem. Jealousy is not LOVE. I know it may seem like a cold thing to say but it may take years for the boy to address these issues in himself. Are you willing to wait and try to help him? You could be waiting a very long time!!
Good luck to you!!

Answer 3

This is not something that gets better over time; it usually gets worse. I have found that guys who accuse a girl of cheating all the time are either very insecure and controlling or they are cheating themselves and they assume because they are, you are too.

Neither hold much promise of a bright future in the relationship; the more you give in and try to appease them, the more they try to control you.

Probably the sooner you end it, the better. The longer you are in a relationship with him, the harder it will be for him to let go. To save his dignity as much as possible, if you do end it is best to tell him that you are not ready for a relationship with anyone right now and want to focus on (whatever something else important in your life you want to focus on), being in a relationship right now is not what you want...it is hard to argue with what a person wants (although he will probably try to tell you what you want or accuse you of cheating and just assure him you have not, but if that is what he choses to believe, that is his choice, but it does not change your decision.

Answer 4

All relationships are built on trust then love, if he does not trust you then he does not feel for you and is only trying to keep control of you. If he is jealous then this is his problem and not yours. He should learn to accept you the way you are and to trust you at all times. Be open and tell him that you can not handle it with him being this way and that it is just pushing you apart instead of bringing you closer together. Honesty and openess are the answer

Answer 5

If he don't trust you it want work. Trust and Communication is very important in a relationship.

He must believe his friends, if he don't trust you.

Your only been together for four months. If your are having this problem now what is it gone to be like in the next four months.

Both of you need to get together and go over your relationship.
Trust is very importation.

Answer 6

first and foremost its u and ur boyfriend. not u, him, and his friends. they need to keep their noses out of u two's business and get a life. and if they really are in ur business like that it is possilbe that his friends may like u. he is a complete idiot if he hasn't fugured that one out. f he continues to blame u kick his *** to the curb because its obvious that he is either insecure or he is doing somethimg himself and covers u the guilt by blaming u. or what if his friends never told him anything. he could just be a complusive liar.

Answer 7

No "action" can regain his have faith. in uncomplicated words time heals this wound. What you likely did replaced into no longer an excellent deal, regardless of the reality that that's the fact you went interior the decrease back of his decrease back to do it. Be uncomplicated any extra and he gets over it.

Answer 8

i think he is acting dumb.maybe you caought him on the rebound and his ex was a cheater.people like dem **** it all up for people like us.just keep ur head up mami and prove to him that here are good people out there.

Answer 9

YOU CANT MAKE SOME ONE TRUST YOU WHEN THEY DONT, IF YOU HAVE NOT GIVEN HIM A REASON NOT TO
TRUST YOU.THEN HE MAY BE THE ONE THAT GOT SOMETHING TO HIDE.AND NEED TO MAKE YOU FEEL
LIKE IT YOUR PROBLEM. LET HIM KNOW HOW YOU FEEL
ABOUT THIS, AND IF HE CANT TRUST YOU THEN TIME TO
LEAVE HIM ALONG.

Answer 10

Why should you trust him? He obviously doesn't trust you!!!!!
Dump him, you don't need that over possessive crap.