I leave in usa and my fiance lives in India, we are about to get married in two months, my dillema is that i found out few days ago that she is having an affair with married man who is 16 years older then her, i confronted her and she said she did it without thinking anything and she is sorry for mistake, would you call it a mistake? what should i do? should i forgive her and get married to her cause i really loved her, but now i am not sure.
2006-12-27 15:07:27 · 28 answers · asked by Mr. one 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Remember that you are going into this marriage with your eyes open-if she cheated on you once she will do it again-a leopard never changes his/her spots-she will cheat on you again and expect you to forgive her-get out now-don't be a fool for one woman that evidently don't love you as much as you love her-she is not trust worthy-a cheat will always be a cheat-if you marry her and she continue to cheat she will bring something home to you that Antibiotics can't take away-think is this worth getting married to a woman that cheated on you before you married her-you love her-but she don't love you-take your hat off and stop using your head for a hat rack.
2006-12-27 16:25:24 · answer #1 · answered by brown sugar 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would end the relationship now. She cheated once, she'll probably do it again. It really does sound like she is only using you to get into the US and become a citizen. Yes, it is sad but, there are women out there in other countries who would marry a man in the US just to get out of their country for whatever reason and become US citizens.
Her saying that she did it without thinking is just an excuse. It's not a mistake, she knew what she was doing and did have the ability to say no. I wouldn't forgiver her for this and it is time to move on and find a good woman here in this country. It's a huge place and there is someone out there for you.
2006-12-27 15:15:48 · answer #2 · answered by kerrberr95 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
if you really love her then maybe you both should call off the wedding and just try to work everything out between the two of you before you make an even bigger commitment. Either that, or leave her because once the trust between the both of you is broken, its hard to regain that. She must not be 100% happy with you if she is seeing another man. And dont you want to marry a women who will be 100% faithful?? Theres nothing worse than a cheating spouse. You already are having problems before the marriage has even begun.
2006-12-27 15:15:24 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mr One,
Forgive and forget, marry her but have her promise that she never speak of or see that man again and tell her that if she can't do that for you then the wedding is off! If you love her only (marry her), if you care about her and you're not sure if you really love her but you think so (don't marry). Good Luck!
2006-12-27 15:17:18 · answer #4 · answered by beamer 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no i dont call it a mistake she knew what she was doing what i would do is forgive her (just because we have to forgive and its good for us) then i would break the commitment iwth her. trust is something key in a relationship, and trust is something hard to get and very easy to loose. i just wouldnt be able to trust if someone did that to me. just like she didnt think that time there might be a second time
on the other hand i've known people who actually make it work, and when they promised they wont do it again they dont. they go to counseling, all that marriage classes, and try to make it work.
but only u know urself, if you will be able to trust her again and dont hold anything against her.
hope all works out for the best
2006-12-27 16:04:02 · answer #5 · answered by answerplease 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Only marry her when you are not hurting anymore. Give yourself time to heal, trust is hard to recover in a relationship so if you have strong feelings don't leave her but let her know how much it hurt and make sure you are ok with what happened, take it slow.
2006-12-27 15:10:49 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Now is a good time to get out of this engagement. It sounds to me like you are just being used to get into the USA legally...have you considered that she might just do this again if you got married? Cheating is not something that is supposed to be forgiven.
2006-12-27 15:09:23 · answer #7 · answered by aimeelopez 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't get married right away I would see if she's gonna stay true to her word and keep a close eye on her see if she can be honest with you even over small things but yea I'd give her another chance maybe only one more but atleast one everyone is entitled to one ***** up. But If she gets to acting funny again or does it again put your boot up her a.ss and out the door
2006-12-27 15:20:31 · answer #8 · answered by eazy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you even consider marrying a woman who cheats on you.she done you a favor by doing it before you married her because after you marry her and she cheats guess what you have to pay her alimony so take off and run now and find a woman who will be faithful to you.
2006-12-27 15:11:04 · answer #9 · answered by sparky75us 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't marry her. It's good you found out before getting married.
2006-12-27 15:14:33 · answer #10 · answered by Hoping he will bless me with #1 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋