I have a close friend that thinks she should dress like guy to be guy. But I feel that it's not what you do it's how you do it. Now one has to know that she is gay but her girl and she should dress as pretty as she is. What do you all think??
2006-12-27 13:44:54 · 23 answers · asked by tritt4 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Oh I don't think so, my Dear. I think she should dress in whichever way she feels the most comfortable. I've dressed primarily in jeans and smocks, t-shirts or henleys for the past 30 years and no one has really said anything to the contrary.( and more than one person has said I'm adorable) It all should depend on what the person is comfortable in wearing...not what *you* want to see her in. Let her make her own decisions. You'll thank yourself for it later and so will she. Blessings.
2006-12-27 14:13:19 · answer #1 · answered by Mama Otter 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I love butches and think that butches of all kinds make the lesbian rainbow more beautiful. My girlfriend is six feet tall, has size thirteen feet and shoulders like a linebacker. She looks much better in the butch clothes she choices than she would in girly clothes. When I came out, about thirty years ago, the style in my area was androgyny. I was the only woman I knew who ever wore a dress and for many years I felt as if I were the wrong kind of lesbian. I think it's great that has loosened up and lesbians dress all kinds of way. And I gotta say, I am dismayed by the homophobia displayed here by other lesbians. You puke when you look at butches? Shame on you! You should respect butch women if for no other reason than our present day lesbian freedoms and culture are built on their backs. You've heard of Stonewall, haven't you? The people who rebelled against police harassment, drove them back and started the modern gay movement were drag queens and butch lesbians. And as far as people needing to know if she's gay - I do want people to know I'm a lesbian. People need to know that they're seeing lesbians doing everyday things - shopping for groceries, working in the food pantry and interacting with children. Because I'm not immediately identified by how I look or dress I'm far more likely to wear a button or a bumpersticker. than my sweetheart is. Support your friend in what she feel comfortable.
2006-12-27 22:48:15 · answer #2 · answered by jane7 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tara, some lesbians where tomboys as kids and are very comfortable in jeans, shirts, sneakers, and tim like shoes. You want be getting them into a dress anytime soon. If they wear a suit or dress slacks they are mostly men's suits and slacks and never a woman's pantsuite or women's slacks. I prefer women's slacks and pant suites; however when I want to wear a tuxedo, I wear a tuxedo. I don't own a dress and I don't dress like a stone butch either. I have my grundge moments of jeans, tee, sneakers and used too a baseball cap until my barber told me to stop wearing them because it makes your hair line recede.
If you look at the history of the lesbian, most of the role models where dressed very buch there are very few fem lesbian role models. About a decade or so ago there was this fad called "lipstick lesbian" and they have gone back in the closet. You don't hear too much from them. There thing was they wouldn't date a butch woman. There are two types of butch women -- hard and soft. Hard butches dresses in male attire and doesn't embrace her feminity; while a soft butch embraces her feminity -- to a degree (we don't take it too far).
So your friend should dress in a way that makes her feel comfortable and not by what society says.
2006-12-27 22:12:33 · answer #3 · answered by cajun7_girl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your friend wants to dress like a guy, then by all means, she should. If she's doing it because she's gay, however, and feels that lesbians must dress so, she's very wrong. There are many, many high-femme, girly lesbian women. I happen to love butch women and girls in guy's clothing, but I would never want a girl to dress/act/look a way that wasn't really 'her', just because she felt she had to.
You say 'no one has to know that she is gay', and I don't know exactly what that means- if she wants people to know about it, you should support that, whether it's by her dress, or a rainbow necklace or carrying a big flag that says 'I'm a lesbian!'.
That's my two cents.
2006-12-27 21:53:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Dressing like a guy doesn't make you a guy, it just gives you a more masculine look.
Personally, I feel they should "dress to feel comfortable." If they are comfortable, they are happy. And isn't that what we want out of life?
2006-12-27 22:30:36 · answer #5 · answered by AdamKadmon 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have always thought a female should dress like one, a male should dress like a male. I am not into gay life style, so I have no idea of what makes them tick or how their minds work. Could care less actually.
2006-12-27 21:51:16 · answer #6 · answered by m c 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'm going to have to go with you on this one! I don't think women need to dress in frills, or super-feminine, but most women (due to their curves) just look dowdy in male dress (unless it's period dress, like frock coats and more tailored/fitted stuff). Jeans, for instance, only look good on very well-proportioned, even skinny women (though they look awful in swimsuits!)...likewise with flannel shirts, etc.
So, gay girls, IMO, like straight ones, would look more attractive not dressing "butch"!
2006-12-27 22:03:18 · answer #7 · answered by Gwynneth Of Olwen 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She certainly doesn't have to dress any way in which she doesn't feel comfortable. Lesbians are attracted to both feminine and masculine looking women. Everyone has a type.
2006-12-27 23:43:55 · answer #8 · answered by ←Shea→ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on the gay gal.. Personally.. I detest to see a gay girl dressed as a butch
2006-12-27 21:48:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
to each her own!
I'm straight, but dress "butch" simply for the comfort level, I was raised for a while by my aunt and her partner (of 41 years) and they introduced me to oversized guy clothes, ball caps and flannel.
Whenever I wear "girl clothes" and make up, nobody recognizes me
I'm comfortable with the way I look, so is the hubby and the kid, I just hate it when they borrow my clothes
2006-12-27 22:26:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋