is he cheating?

Question

Cheating husband?
My husband works at a ditribution center...in a freezer...he wears old clothes...and heavy sweatshirts...today I come home from work...which is when he leaves for work.....he said he has to work on dry side...which means like bananas...which doesn't require him to wear sweatshirts...okay fine...well he has a descent shirt on ...ok...jeans...but still has his nasty work shoes on...he has a burned dvd in his hand that he says he copied for one of his co-workers....I just find all of this odd...am I jumping to conclusions...I don't want to ask/accuse...


I should have also told you all that last January he was chatting and had exchanged phone numbers with another female....gave him his moms #


also if this helps with an answer...when we are in "bed"....he now kisses me very roughly...and does other things that he normally doesn't do...when it comes to the "bed"

he has my old car that he now drives...anyway I was doing laundry and found a very thin long hair on his sweatshirt...my hair is thick...and I am a hairdresser...and I know it wan't mine....but could it have been a hair left from me since it was my car

Answer 1

OK - I answered it last time you asked - but cheater alarms are now going off. Time to confront him. Not just because you have some evidence but because you have that special feeling that wives get - I think you know best.

Answer 2

Honestly for anybody to answer that question without knowing you two it is hard to tell, but from what Ive gathered. The fact that he was wearing a nice shirt does not mean he is cheating or meeting a girl. If that were so he would not wear his filthy shoes and if its possible that he may just be carrying nice shoes in the car or a backpack, he would put all of his nice clothes in there to avoid getting them dirty at work. basically the fact that he wore those nasty shoes should be a relief to you. I have taken burned DVD's to friends many times. The phone number thing is a completly different subject. The fact that he gave a girl a phone number that he knew you would not answer is very suspecious. The bed thing can go either way. He may just be feeling happier lately or he may feel guilty. Sorry I could not be more help on that one. The best thing to do is to just talk to him about it calmly, avoid a fight if you can, kill him with kindness and make him feel guilty. If he is a good guy and he really is cheating it will come out.

Answer 3

That is always a tough situation, and while the odds aren't looking good, maybe it's time to have a talk. Not the kind of ..I yell at you and you get defensive talk, but one where you find out if he's happy with things or you tell him your concerns, that maybe you are being jealous cuz you haven't spent time together but you just want you both to be happy, so if there is a problem?

I would also make sure he knows that while you enjoy being intimate his recent behavior is a bit differnt or uncomfortable for you, and see if he responds more favorably knowing your feelings.

Either outcome, knowing is better than living a lie & you both can end up with the lives you deserve together or apart. I hope of course it's just an misunderstanding.

Answer 4

The exchanging phone numbers, would bother me the most, it does not prove that he is cheating, but he could be on the look out. It's time to have a talk with your hubby, maybe it's just a wake up call for the 2 of you, are you taking each other for granted? Or getting a little bored with each other? (this happens in all marriages), if he is trying new things in bed, at least he is still wanting you, Talk to him , either way it's not too late.

Answer 5

DVD... could it be a porn? Maybe that is why he is acting different in bed... maybe he wants to try new things.... don't let your mind run wild.. but do keep your eyes open and step back and ask yourself the questions... would he.. why... and am I jumping the gun? Does he come home on time... can you get a hold of him at work? Could you go to his work when he wasn't expecting it? Do you see his pay cheques... if you do... do you see the amout per cheque.. ( if he is missing days you will see this in the amount that he is getting paid )..... just keep your eyes open.... and if things keep popping up.. then ask him straight out... get the number of the woman that he was chatting with.. ( how did you get that info lol) and talk to her... call her.... hope things go ok.. take care...

Answer 6

Don't jump to conclusions I would ask about giving his moms # to another female if you did not snoop to get this info. Marriage is based on trust you seem very unhappy with your husband. Does he treat you bad verbal or physcial abuse? If he does you need to get out before someone gets hurt if not. Try to pray and ask the Lord to give you and your husband better communication skills. When women get married they all of a sudden think they can question the man every moment about everything which is wrong and annoying. You are his spouse not his mother love and accept your husband. Try to gain him by being someone he enjoys hanging out with don't be so uptight losen up and enjoy you. God bless you I know what you are going through but for your sanity forgive your husband and try to focus on what attracted you to him inthe beginning we forget so fast when problems arrise. Wifes use to win their men from their chaste and quiet spirit. Work on making your house a home for both of you.

Answer 7

Does seem a little odd. However, it is extremely easy to jump to conclusions. You could always just ask..if he gets really defensive then sometimes they are guilty..or have a guilty conscious. Who knows really..been there done that and it's hard to deal with and figure out when it's a lie or the truth. Only you know when he's lying..if you've been together long enough. Good luck!

Answer 8

As women, we have this connection to the ones we love. We just get that feeling and it consumes us. if you are a pretty rational person, then you are probably right. tell him what you think. Don't accuse him, just tell him why. Don't be stupid. Listen to everything he says and remember. No one can keep a lie right. Also, look at yourself. Are you getting "BORING" or "COMFORTABLE" ? A man coming home to the same ol' bag, serving the same ol' dry chicken, wearing the same ol' Tee shirt and ponytail, can lose the effect YOU want. Then, he goes to work and sees "HER". Freshly showered, fresh make up and the always friendly work personality. Why wouldn't he be intrigued? Just food for thought.

Answer 9

Well...I don't want to jump to conclusions, but it all seems suspicious. Has he started listening to new music, taken on new interests, or is he taking better care of himself (working out, wearing cologne,etc...)? My experience when I suspected my ex-husband was cheating was that trying to talk with him about it just got me MORE lies. If he is willing to betray your vows, he will have no problem lying to you. I would encourage you to get some cold hard facts - cell phone bills, pictures, etc... before confronting him. I'd also encourage you to get a good attorney.

Answer 10

you could just ask him but hes not going to tell you the truth even if he was and that will just make him accuse you of not trusting him. the roughness in the bedroom could mean hes just wanting to explore new things.the same old ways get boring if you know how its going to be every-time besides, didn't that turn you on even more trust in him until he gives you reason not to, i see nothing there that shows signs of cheating.