What is a good curfew for a 17 year old girl?

Question

I got home at 10:30pm last night and now my mom is mad at me. She told me that I wasn't supposed to be out late, and that 10 would of been late enough. I drive so its not like she has to pick me up or anything, and I tell her exactly where I'm going so its not like she couldn't find me if she needed to.

My mom never told me what time to be home at all she said was don't be too late, and as how she let me out until 10:30 the other night I thought that 10:30 was a reasonable time. Also I think that I am pretty responsible, I get good grade and my homework done on time. I also make sure that my younger brother(16) gets to work on time and that he gets home from work alright, even if that means I have to stop what I am doing to go get him. And I do call her if I am going to be late, even if its just by a minute.

Answer 1

This is coming from a mother but I don't want to preach. I would say that as long as you are responsible and are where you say you are and with who you say you are with that has to be between you and your parents. Did your mother give you the 10:00 curfew before you came home at 10:30? If she did and you were late then I would place the blame with you. If she did not tell you what time she wanted you home and you came home at 10:30 (which I personally think is a reasonable time) then the fault would be with her not setting up the guidelines before hand. In your defense I could say that you will be out on your own soon and you need more responsibility and freedom (we were all 17 at one time). In your mother's defense though. Things are a lot different now then they were when we were teenagers. Parent's have a lot more to worry about than our parents did. Even though you are 17 and responsible that does not mean that all of the other people out there are. My advice to you would be (although it will be hard) to be honest with your mother and follow her rules. The more you adhere to her rules then then more she will trust you and perhaps allow you more freedom. We all have to follow rules we don't like or agree with. I will give you an example in my life. I am a nurse and last year the agency that accredits hospitals decided that nurses should not wear acrylic nails for "infection control" purposes and women getting fungal infections under those fingernails. I was very conservative with mine and kept them just longer than my finger tips and did not paint them wild colors (atually french manicure). I was not happy about the new rule because I loved my nails and felt like it was taking away some individuality and I ALWAYS wear gloves when I even go near a patient so no risk of infection to them or me. But, still have to abide by the rules whether I agree with them or not. Hang in there dear. You will probably be a mother some day and have even more things to worry about than your mother and myself do about our kids right now. Your mom will always worry about you whether you are 17 or 37. You cannot be replaced and she just wants what is best for you while still allowing you some freedom (driving) even though that in itself is hard.

Answer 2

It depends on circumstances and your maturity level. Did your mom make it clear that you were supposed to be back before 10? If so then you broke her rules and violated her trust. I don't know your mom, but I would venture to guess that you will get further with her and be allowed later curfew if you showed the responsibility and respect of making it back home by the time she requires of you. Try talking openly and respectfully with her about a later curfew. A little respect goes a long way. The way you sound in your question you come off as being very defensive and argumentative. Be open and honest. You're a young lady, there are plenty of reasons why your mom wants to protect you. You need to show (not just tell) that you are responsible and that a later curfew would be OK.

You're 17 and close to becoming an adult, but remember you're still a minor and living under your mom's roof so you need to live by her rules.

Or you can do the typical teenage thing... Yell, scream, throw a fit, sneak out, get caught, yell, scream some more. Pout and wonder why your life is so horrible and your mom is so mean. Move out the first chance you get, realize that it sucks and figure out a year or so later how good you had it.


Good luck.

Answer 3

I would say 10PM on a school night and 12 Mid. on the weekends or when school isn't in session. I think that all depends on what else is going on too along with the area you live in. She's just looking out for your best interest hon. A good rule of thumb would be also, to call her if you know that you are going to be a little late for whatever reason. Parents worry more than you know and you could never understand how much until you are a parent yourself. Trust me, as a teen I thought that my parents rules were too strict. Now that I am a parent, I understand why.

Answer 4

12

Answer 5

11

Answer 6

for teenagers there is a curfew and that's everywhere. It's 10:30 and if your not home and your caught out your parents can get in trouble for that so I would stick to that curfew. On school nights it's 10:00 and weekends it's 10:30.

Answer 7

your mom should let you stay out untill you decide to come home tell her "i came home at ten alot of other girls would be out all night" your gonna be 18 so that means no leash no curfew you shouldnt have a curfew and that shes not gonna have controll over you

and you are very responsible by what you said your mom should crack after you explain your responsibility

im only 14 and i have no curfew i have staright F's but my parents know i am responsible and make good choices

i just h8 homework i get 100%s on all my tests

they just want me to be happy

and more importantly safe

your mom just really loves you and wants you safe and not out getting pregnaut or something of the sort just tell your mom those things will not happen and she'll probaly accept the fact your an adult now and let you stay out

Answer 8

at 12

Answer 9

listen to someone a tad older and wiser, tell your MOM you'll be home at 10, and come home at 9 that night, next night say 10, come home at 9:55, next nite say 10 and come home at 9:30. TRUST ME, you'll get your hours extended for showing good faith, AND ACTING VERY ADULT, proven to work ! then ya get a tad bit more freedom to PARTY a TAD MORE ! (thinking man's way) all of a sudden it's extended to 12 AM, bam then ya 18, and it's 1 am and later, before ya know it your at a diner with your friends at 5:30 after closing the clubs !

Then you become an adult, and miss it, you can stay out as late as you like but, then there's work YUK ! I'd give my world to be 17 again

Answer 10

A lot of it depends on you. It sounds as though you do the right things (let her know where you are, etc.), so she may be upset about something else. Ask her to set specific time for you, or offer to let her know what time you will be coming home, if you have something going on that will keep you longer than normal.

It doesn't sound like you have a set curfew (so that means she trusts you), and I would try to avoid one. Communication is the key...find out what her real problem is, and work it out.