GIve it time, if you really care about her and want to develop a life commitment, you don't want to be the rebound relationship. She needs time to heal and you can be instrumental in assisting her to see her worth.
However, she will want to validate her attractiveness and worthiness and that may mean jumping into a relationship. Statistics show such relationships do not work. If you truly want to be with her and her children, be the one she comes to love over time, not the flash in the pan.
She needs emotional support, help with the children and real friendship without other ambitions. At least ... for a time. You need to be able to read her emotional state. To win her, give her flowers, listen to her rants and love the children and spend time with them so that they want you to be their dad.
If she is as wonderful as I believe you think she is, she will sense the kind of man you are. Marrying a friend is the best kind of marriage.
This means telling her you care but also telling her you are willing to wait til she has time to get past the feelings of rejection and betrayal, and loss. Hopefully, she is stable minded and this will only take months. If you hang in there with her and her children you have a good chance of being her true and faithful love for life. Good luck!!
2006-12-27 09:17:08
·
answer #1
·
answered by Anonymous
·
1⤊
0⤋
Do not tell her. Be a supportive friend, and that is all. This is not an opportunity for you to move in. It's her time to try and readjust to her life, her emotions, and her new place in the world. It's a tough time, and dating you isn't going to be one of her priorities. So back off. In time, if she is interested, and you have been supportive and a good friend, then maybe the next step will be the right thing. I would give it at least 6 months though. I know when I divorced, I wanted nothing to do with men or dating for at least 6 months. However, I did end up eventually marrying the man who was my friend through it all - keyword "friend". We married 3 years after my divorce if that is any indication.
2006-12-27 09:11:19
·
answer #2
·
answered by nottashygirl 6
·
0⤊
0⤋
Maybe you can start by being friend and offering assistance with her children, when a man has cheated on you put you in debt if can be hard to handle the betrayal.
Spend the day with them, plan some activities like a picnic or offer to take her children out to the movies, zoo etc.. Build a bond with the children also.
2006-12-27 09:13:31
·
answer #3
·
answered by Emily L 4
·
0⤊
0⤋
Thats a tough one. It really depends on what her current mental and emotional state is. She doesn't need another bomb dropped on her. She'll be confused. IMO I think you should atleast wait 2-3 months. She should have come to terms with her divorce. She's not "over it", but her mind may be in a better state that it is currently in. For the mean time, just keep being her friend. She'll need that.
2006-12-27 09:13:25
·
answer #4
·
answered by gloried 3
·
0⤊
0⤋
Maybe instead of asking her out you could help her out sometimes on the weekends with stuff that she needs done around the house and yard, as the friend that you are. Then you can get a feel for when she is ready to move on, and you'll be helpful in the meantime. Hopefully, you would want to help her out anyway, so this would be a workable solution. Best of luck to both of you!
2006-12-27 09:13:00
·
answer #5
·
answered by mizchulita 3
·
0⤊
0⤋
You need to give her time to get over the divorce it is not easy because she probably still has feeling for him. You do not want to rush into a relationship until she is ready. I would say a year or so. You can just be a good friend to her now.
2006-12-27 09:17:17
·
answer #6
·
answered by red1967 4
·
0⤊
0⤋
If you waited 10 years, you can wait another year, let her get settled first, its a big change in her life, be there as a friend to help for now. I think she will appreciate that more than you trying to ask her out.
2006-12-27 09:28:49
·
answer #7
·
answered by jimmy.parker06 5
·
0⤊
0⤋
You should wait until she is stable enough to start dating and then just tell her how you feel about her! Take her out on a date and let her know how you feel inside and she might be hesitant at first but if the feeling is mutual she will come around. Good luck!
2006-12-27 09:12:07
·
answer #8
·
answered by Anonymous
·
0⤊
0⤋
You should wait until she is stable enough to start dating and then just tell her how you feel about her! Take her out on a date and let her know how you feel inside and she might be hesitant at first but if the feeling is mutual she will come around. Good luck!
2006-12-27 09:10:34
·
answer #9
·
answered by Lori J 2
·
1⤊
0⤋
i'm 36 and that i does not be waiting as a lot as now someone 23. There are too many variations in adulthood. I have some youthful acquaintances, yet we are at extremely diverse degrees in existence. i'd be very uncomfortable in my opinion. At 23 you're basically extremely beginning existence and an man or woman and choose that factor to change into who you're. i do not study about you, yet i'm a diverse man or woman than at the same time as i replaced into 23. yet you want to do what's ideal for you and under no circumstances difficulty about what others imagine. if you're comfortable with it , then you extremely ought to do what's ideal for you. you at the on the spot are not robbing the cradle- both actual one of you're adults. at the same time as i replaced into 33 I dated a 28 3 hundred and sixty 5 days previous or maybe he replaced right into somewhat youthful for me. He wanted to not sleep all evening and drink and characteristic relaxing, that's fantastic, yet I have a occupation and commitments and issues to be stricken about. He replaced into an excellent guy, yet basically at a diverse degree in existence than me. I now am with a 40 2 3 hundred and sixty 5 days previous and it can't be more beneficial. i love a extra mature , known guy, who knows a thanks to be a guy with self belief. i'm confident he's an excellent guy, yet 23 is somewhat youthful in my humble opinion. supply him a at the same time as to be... good success.
2016-12-01 05:51:30
·
answer #10
·
answered by jaffar 4
·
0⤊
0⤋