after splitting from my husband (my choice) i started dating a guy who i was crazy about. he came on strong, then disappeared & really hurt me. i have now met a new man who is fantastic in so many ways, but i am having such a hard time believing everything he says to me & so afraid i will be hurt again if i give myself to him 100% like in the past. any advice on how to trust again? don't like the feeling that i've been played.
2006-12-27 08:13:13 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
As you grow and mature, you learn to ask the right questions and determine if someone is coming from a place of integrity.
You can only be played if you are in the game. When you stop playing the victim and start coming from a place of ownership and authority you will always be led.
Lead or be led, your choice.
2006-12-27 08:17:16 · answer #1 · answered by Rowdy Yayhoot 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Dear, ...I only wish that I could tell you how to trust again. What I can tell you is ;...... ah first ,I wouldn't give anyone 100% ,cause any way your settin' your self up PERIOD. Then it would depend on the person....i wonder......I f you are anything like me ..people mistake politeness for weak ness. ...So..this is the only thing that I have to offer you.... I decieded too take My little red wagon,..put all my good stuff inside( meaning me)and walked slowly back to my porch . And sat there .. know what happened? ...... All the cons , and all the women,(I guess I meant yo say girls) that I had met, came strollin' up to see why I'd stop playing.? ...............And I .Watched these people , run around bumpin' heads ! Goin' in circles.......and I realized it was because How I chose played,' was not to play.' it was weird... so I Watch them for awhile...... however , (like poker ) always anti-up again. Never give up!!!
I know this sounded simple..well maybe I am..... but I know who
iI can trust ..... Ms.Kate
Very good advise waozoo!!!
2006-12-27 09:08:42 · answer #2 · answered by rrainn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try this one on for size, honey: I've dated 3 gay guys. Trust issues are my thing! Take it from me, when you meet the right guy, you'll know it. It may take a while but it'll all work out in the long run. My best advice is to just go with the flow. If you really like this new guy, try him on for size but don't trust him until you really get to know him. If you think he's not telling the truth like the other guys, open up to him about your previous relationships and your trust issues. Any guy who really cares about you will understand COMPLETELY! If he disappears like the other one, he wasn't worth it anyways.
2006-12-27 08:20:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I truly believe that it is all about how you see yourself. Do you really know who you are? When women are whole without a man in their life then they will attract men with the right intention, but when we look for men because we need them we leave ourselves vulnerable. There are personality types for men and women, there are plenty of books on how to understand these types. Know your men before you choose one. Trust you first, trust that you can make choices. Asking the question about trust then do you have reasons not to trust this one? Ask the right questions of this man if you are having doubts, he is the only one who can clear anything for you. You set the boundaries, let it be known what you will and will not tolerable and stick to your beliefs. Be strong. You will not be played if you set the game rules. Only you know what you will or will not accept in your life, but start with belief in yourself woman!
2006-12-27 08:34:26 · answer #4 · answered by bullied2much 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
just accept the fact that it could happen and if it does you really don't want to be with him anyway. if he betrays you, it will hurt, but he will lose more than you.
2006-12-27 08:16:08 · answer #5 · answered by snocy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋