how can I tell someone whom I have been seeing for the last 5 years that I am done. Yes I am married, and he is also, I understand it's wrong and I should know better but we have both been through hell and back with our partners and 2 wrongs don't make a right. I think we got together to support each other in our marriages and ended up falling for each other. There have been several times we both tried to end it but we couldn't. I would end up call him or him me. I would stop but I have to see him. He owns his own company and we have a contract with him so I will see him every month or so when he comes in. Please help. I know I am wrong fromt he get go. I really adore him, but I know I can't go on with the relationship we have been having for the last 5 years..........
2006-12-27 07:59:47 · 20 answers · asked by live, love, laugh often! 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
This depends ,the relationship I mean, on you and only you. You say you adore him.Do you love him? I think in your case,adore possibly means ESCAPE from your everyday life,all the complications.
Five years ,a long time .You know him well.
Marriage, becomes comfortable,probably a habit after a while. It's hard to pull away. I know.I was married 25 years;divorced,my choice, and I am happy with the decision. It took years to reach.
Put behind the guilt.You have may not "have been wrong from from the get go." Life is a two way street. We can always turn around.
2006-12-27 08:34:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a sticky situation. Unfortunately, u will both hurt.. thats just the reality of it. When someone means something to u and u know that u cant be with that someone what will u feel inside?? Hurt. Also, y would u be staying with ur husband if u have been cheating on him for the last 5 yrs? Seems that he isnt what u want either.. or was it exciting to have a lover on the side? Oh what a tangled web we weave when we practice to deceive, looks like u have to find ur way out of this one. If u were having issues with ur husband, why didnt u go to him. Why didnt u talk to him and try to fix things with him, not go crying to ur lover. What about hurting ur spouse and him hurting his spouse, or doesnt that matter? Like the old saying goes "what comes around goes around".. Good luck...
2006-12-27 16:09:00 · answer #2 · answered by snowbunny67ss 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you are in pretty deep, but you really have to weigh the situation to get the better outcome. ask yourself is your relationship with your husband going to work out? if not this is the relationship you should end because if it was so great why did you end up cheating. sometimes a what seems like a bad thing can be a good thing. pray about it and do not take anyone person's advice judge for yourself. life is to short to be miserable. i come before the letter u in the alphabet, in short make yourself happy before u can make anyone else happy.
2006-12-27 16:26:45 · answer #3 · answered by sexy black 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you don't want to end it with this guy. If that's the case, get divorced (both of you) and become committed. If you don't love your spouses and aren't committed to them, why string them along, only hurting them more? I'm not saying you should throw away your marriage. If you can work things out with your husband, try putting your energy into counseling. But the reality of it is, you're in love with another man. You have to decide what you're going to do SOON and do it!
2006-12-27 16:13:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
There's no way out without pain for both of you. If you both really want to get together you should get divorced first. If you are meant to be together, then you will be, but only if you do the right thing. Good luck with this!
2006-12-27 16:04:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are serious about ending it than I would cut all ties from him, including the business contract. If he calls later down the road, tell him never to call you again and know you are ending the cycle of betrayal to both of your spouses.
2006-12-27 16:11:48 · answer #6 · answered by CA DIVA 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
5 years is a long time to repeat the same mistake. Ask yourself why, than ask yourself what is best for ALL the people involved in this. It's not just the two of you. I hope there are no children.
2006-12-27 16:05:44 · answer #7 · answered by whateverhohum 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hmmm. sit him down and tell him and see if he wants the same thing. Maybe you 2 will end up together . Either way work on yourself. Love you then love others.
2006-12-27 16:04:31 · answer #8 · answered by James B 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
girl the only reason you think you like him is because he is there to understand you but lets say you all would hook up you all wouldn't last cuz what you have is just a fling that happens when you can't stand your partner.don't go base on the sex cuz it won't work if you all get together. stay with your man the one you are married to and keep things the way they are now
2006-12-27 16:06:03 · answer #9 · answered by Izzy 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Tell him what you had is over. When he visits your office behave in a professional way and don't discuss anything personal or be alone with him. Change your phone number and don't call him.
2006-12-27 16:04:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋